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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'

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Nathan and Ash!

5/10/2017

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3 October 2017


Nathan and Ash spent day two of their visit to Gran Alacant, relaxed by our pool; in the evening they both went to the beach. They do seem to be enjoying themselves, impressed with this part of Spain and all it has to offer. After work it was nice sat chatting with Nathan after so many years, we had a lot to catch up on; Nathan hasn't changed a bit, although grown up a lot, which is great to see! In truth a week with friends is never long enough; however, I know Nathan will be a regular visitor!

While the boys relaxed, I was at work......


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After a rather late night at LoungeD, we said farewell to two of our favourite Scots Pete and Joan, who are returning to the UK after their holiday. I will be sad to see these two go, they have been great customers, who we have got to know well over the last few weeks; see you soon guys!
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4 October 2017


I had me first day off in over two months on Wednesday, so spent the day with Nathan and Ash, relaxing and drinking in the sun; I haven't done that in a while. Natalee met us at Zest, introducing her to these two guys for the first time. Nathan had left my life, before Natalee came along, so they never met, despite living in the same city. It felt great to be surrounded by people I have known for many years, from Southampton, a city I will always call home, living in Spain or not. Chatting about the things we used to get up to, times, long since past and memories, still fresh in the mind, if a little hazy, was a fantastic tonic for me. I still miss home from time to time, staying in contact with people helps me deal with the homesickness. When old friends and companions come to visit, my spirits are lifted in the best way possible.  It's great to have Nathan here, just like it was yesterday!
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End of Interlude!

9/7/2017

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There isn't a lot of time left now, before the new bar opens next week.  We went out for a few drinks last night, having a fabulous time as usual. This is the last weekend before Darrell and I start working, so it was appropriate to spend time with friends. It has been exactly a year, since I was last employed at Dunbar's, so the first few weeks, opening a new bar are going to be something of a culture shock for me; in a good way of course!
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In today's blog entry, I wanted to reflect over the last year; boy what a year it has been, for both Darrell and myself. This time last year I had finished working at Dunbar's, as Darrell prepared to travel to Australia; spending the final month together before his departure at the beginning of August. We had never spent longer than a week apart from each other in twenty two years; having to spend seven months without one another was going to be hard. Having just moved to a foreign country, without a trusted support network  and without an income, were just some of the obstacles we had to overcome, in what was a most difficult year, one I would rather forget and certainly not a time I would want to revisit again.

Surviving on ones own, isn't something I have done very often in my life, in fact the last time I had to do it, was when I attended University in 1992. I was never any good at living as a single man and found this last year hard. I did of course have a small group of people around me; although these people are no longer there, I am grateful they were at the time. In reality I spent most of the time on my own, or with Jamie, before he left for home in January of this year. After the trauma of Oxfam I was and still am, very reluctant to invite people into my life. Even in Gran Alacant, we have experienced difficulties with individuals, who others had warned us about. Only now am I able to stand tall and have the courage of my own convictions. 

The last year, has taught me a great deal; hardships tend to make us stronger and I have learned to live in a way, only my grandparents would understand. Living on 10,00€ a week, is not something I have ever had to endure, but am grateful I did it. Living hand to mouth at my time of life, is not a way of life I would recommend, but the life lessons you learn are invaluable. As a person, I have always been independent, not wanting to ask anyone for anything. I was more likely to get taken from or used, even if I didn't have a cent to my name; not any longer however; hardship has also taught me to harden up, say no and walk away. 

While Darrell was away in Australia, I was trying to live my life, the best way I could and am lucky enough today, to have gained a strong network of friends, who have been more than generous, towards us. We have gradually changed our circle of contacts over the last year, as our life, and those we used to be friends with, have changed direction. This is probably the first time in my life, when I have actually finally began to think of myself and Darrell only. When you have nothing, you have nothing to give; the networkers and takers, also tend to avoid people like us, because we have nothing worth taking. You are finally left with a small group of people, close, good quality friends, with no expectations on anyone's part.

With Jamie leaving in January, my life really did take a downward spiral. Jamie left me financially in a mess and it was touch and go, whether or not I would survive. With Darrell caring for his Mother and having no source of income, these were dark times, during a particularly bad winter in Spain. This was the lowest point in my life here, the last few months before Darrell returned were deeply disturbing. I saw friends less and less, as they had their own lives to lead and initial reasons of companionship dwindled away.

I managed to pop out as often as a could, to my local pub, Zest in Sierra Mar. I have never been a person, who walked into bars on my own and to be honest never needed to, but when you are feeling low and in need of company, with few people to rely on, it is the ideal place to sit, relax and unwind. The people who work at Zest are great, whose company I enjoy; each of them were there for me, during difficult times. I have formed many close bonds and am lucky enough to call many of those who work there, friends. Zest will always be my local, somewhat of a sanctuary, away from the stresses of life in Spain.

​Natalee Michele is back in our life, after we fell our nearly a year before. Darrell arranged for us to meet at Zest, where we sorted out our differences finally, realising in the process that out initial reasons for breaking contact, were probably made up in the minds of others, trying to drive a wedge between friends. It is good to have her back  and I am thankful to all those who played their part in getting us talking again. 

Our first cat Precious,  died in March. Her health had become steadily worse over the winter and by March, she was practically lifeless. A friend, Paul took me and Precious to the vets in Santa Pola, where I decided to have her put to sleep. The lady vet thought she had experienceda brain hemorrhage and suggested the most humane option. This all happened on the day Darrell returned to the UK, renewing his visa and sorting out the last of the paperwork for residencia  in Spain. Like Darrell, I miss Precious everyday; we still have Lily, although after the death of her sister, she has aged dramatically; I don't think she is long for this world. I am happy we rescued Lily and continue to give her a good life. Animals play a very important role in a home.
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Darrell in Britain

​Darrell returned home in the middle of May, finally back together, hopefully for good. I am not sure whether this is the end of the tough times or not. The insecurity and anxiety I feel is still there, inside of me, after such testing times. I still believe there are real struggles ahead for us both, as we adapt to yet another new chapter in our life. This will once again be a learning curve, a time that will help secure our life in Spain or not and hopefully avoid returning to Britain anytime soon. The bipolarcoaster ride, I have been on since 2014 continues unabated. In time  as we both gain the security we deserve, the ups and downs of our life will cease to be important. A smooth ride is all I desire, doing our time, forebearance over personal burden and vestigial perseverance, in the face of disaster, will help to repair the damage of the past. To learn, is to evolve; evolving helps to forget; always a reminder of challenges overcome!
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Overdoing it!

3/7/2017

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Another lovely weekend here in Gran Alacant. After a shaky start weather wise, Darrell and myself popped out for dinner at our increasingly favourite restaurant, Tutti's. As usual the food was exceptional, equally the service. They are a great bunch down there, always welcoming and friendly!

Just around the corner from Tutti's we had a brief stop over at Dunbars, chatting with Carol, from Sierra Mar, who it has to be said, I don't see too often, but always enjoy her company. Carol and myself have a lot to talk about, we are both political animals from the 'right' side of the argument; always vocal, always opinionated!

We then left with Annamarie, for a night at La Piedra and Ohana's for Brazilian night. Had a ball as usual with good friends; meeting some new and wonderful characters in the process; who could ask for more!

Sunday was a difficult day in all respects. Getting in at 6am, is not the norm for me. Typical, true to form, I suffered all day, staying in bed, in the sweltering heat, fan full on in my face. It's hard being 46!
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Line dancing!

16/5/2017

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Click on photo 'Linedance International,' to take you to their website.
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Whilst at Dunbar's yesterday, I met a  lady called Julie. Julie was in Gran Alacant, looking for a venue, to carry out her line dancing classes. Mandy was more than happy to accommodate, offering a spacious upstairs function room.

It was fantastic talking to Julie, who has just moved to El Altet, with her husband. Currently, they run classes in Benidorm and wanted to expand further, using a relocation, as an opportunity to come to GA.

I will be taking part in the classes myself, especially as I am looking to loose weight, having put on about three stone, since moving to Spain. Back in the 1990s, I was a regular nightclub dancer, and understand, just how much weight you can lose, by dancing,

I am sure there will be many people interested in joining Julie with her weekly classes, why not sign up today, cowboy hats optional! 
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Dunbars!

16/5/2017

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I was out and about in Gran Alacant yesterday, having a few beers before Darrell gets home tomorrow evening. After a quick pint at Zest, I popped up to Dunbar's to see my old boss Mandy. Bumping into Shaun, a fellow Expat, I got to know, whilst working for Mandy, a year ago, was a bonus. I always enjoy our conversations, yesterday was no exception, as we talked about the weather and politics, perfect  subjects to get to grips with, sat in the Spanish sun, drinking cognac. I had a thoroughly enjoyable afternoon; despite the sunburn, I received, whilst sat on Dunbar's beautiful terrace, in the scorching sun!
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I got home relatively early, after picking up some fish and chips, to take away, from Zest. To be honest, I would much rather spent time out, during the day, than at night. When you have weather this good, you have to make the most of it!  

The sunset was gorgeous last night and I spent an hour sat on the balcony with the cat, watching the sun go down.  It's funny, despite all the stress I have, I don't feel it in the same way I did, in the UK. Spain has many downsides, but it is a great stress healer!
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Dunbars - Mandy!

17/3/2017

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Had a lovely day yesterday.  Firstly we popped up to Zest, with Dawn to say farewell to Brett and Lee, who had sadly, already left.  It was Norwegian day in the square, their weakly prize draw, fish and chips and gorgeous sunshine, so we had a couple of beers and another one of those unusual chats, this time about Switzerland and Jeremy Kyle.  It's good to talk!

Darrell and myself also popped up to see Mandy, my ex employer who has just returned to Gran Alacant, reopening Dunbars, for the summer season.  I haven't seen Mandy since May last year.  We had a lovely afternoon, spent chatting with this wonderful lady, there was a lot to catch up on. It really is good to have her back!
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The Fork - Part II

2/1/2017

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The Fork - Future
Direction?​


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There are times in ones life, when one feels desultory and directionless. This morning I was watching ‘New Life Down under’, the BBC programme, that shows how different ones life could be, relocating to Australia or New Zealand. Funny enough they were in Darrell’s home city, Perth. Now I have lived there a few times before, and am always interested to see just how much the place has changed over the years. In 1995 and 1998, I felt unable to live in Australia; maybe I was just too young, or maybe, there were other deep rooted issues, that I had, at the time, that prevented me from staying!

The Television programme was an eye opener for me today. I was looking at a place, I didn’t know any more. Property prices had gone through the roof; rather like they have in the UK. The cost of living was also completely out of the reach of people like me. I am of course always interested to see if I could live back in Perth, but the revelations, made clear on this show, put the breaks on that idea; I was going to say dream, but in truth, living in Australia has never been a dream, it has always been something I would have done, if necessary, in order to move forward. Well and truly out of my reach and in a way, I was glad of that, because, when one considers the options available, whilst determining future direction, the more paths there are, the harder it is to choose.

I have no regrets about trying to live in Australia, it is a beautiful country and there are many opportunities out there, for people with the skills to negotiate their way through life. Australia is beginning to suffer, at the hands of, the World economic crisis, and there are many difficulties associated with trying to build a new life there. Australia does not recognize mine and Darrell’s marriage, the main reason I am still living in Spain. I would have no legal status down under and that is not acceptable to me, after being in a relationship for twenty one years. The difficulties involved in trying to establish ones self in a Country that does not accept ones sexuality are a complete no go, a non starter! I am not saying all Australians are homophobic, but from the ones I know of, I believe a good proportion are. That is a terrible indictment on this fine country!

The United Kingdom, has always been my home, so leaving it and coming here was a huge wrench. I have lived in Spain now for a little under a year, but could Britain still be the future for myself and Darrell? Well the circumstances of our arrival in Gran Alacant are well known, so for the foreseeable future we are unable to return to the UK. There will be a time, when we have to, but that is a long way off at the moment. There is much I love about Britain, I miss the good wage packet each month, the convenience of city life, going to the theatre, eating in good restaurants and of course the biggie, the friends I left behind.

If I look back at the time in Britain, did I ever really have a sense of direction? Well yes I did; for the ten years prior to moving to Spain, I had a good job, working with a charity I loved and people I adored. I had many friends in my personal and professional life and felt that I could finally achieve all the things I wanted to, moving up the corporate ladder as it were and achieve good things. Of course, in life, that is what we all desire; given the right opportunities and working environment, all my ambitions were perfectly achievable. I obviously didn’t bargain on having a Sociopath for a Manager, who not only gave me a false sense of hope, but also, endangered my physical and mental wellbeing. I thought I had a sense of direction at that time, but maybe, I didn’t, maybe it was all smoke and mirrors, a mirage. The false sense of security, I thought I had was nothing more than what others wanted me to believe.

To be honest, I haven’t given up on Britain; maybe one day in the future I will end up back there. I have spoken about the future many times before, not least in this blog, and it does change all the time, depending on my current thought process. The one thing that tends to stay the same, is the possibility of returning home at some stage, mainly through practicality and necessity, not because of desire!

So it does look like, for the time being at least, myself and Darrell will be staying on in Spain, for a good few years minimum. It was always our dream to live in Europe at some stage, loving the many wonderful occasions , we spent in countries, from France to Italy and Hrvatska. Continental Europe has always been a draw for us and unlike the UK and Australia, there are opportunities here, that just do not exist in either of the other two countries.

Lets look at what I have managed to achieve in the first year, briefly, as I have covered this before. I managed a charity shop, something I did in Britain, worked in a professional kitchen as a chef, write for a magazine, teach in a school and in March will open a new bar. Personally I don’t think that is bad going, for my first year living here. I have achieved far more in Spain, than I ever did in the UK or Australia, For these reasons alone, I have to give this place a chance. I want to be a success in life; at the moment I can gain at least some of what I desire, living and working here. Spain has been good to me, it’s time to give something back!

I have no doubt that I will reach many others forks in the road and will have many more decisions to make in the future, but for now, my life, it’s direction and future are firmly grounded in Gran Alacant. For the first time, in many years I have focus, able to take command of my own destiny and can finally see success, just around the corner!

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Fork in the road!

26/7/2016

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So today is another fork in the road moment.  After six months in Spain, five months in my current job, I am now finally moving on.  In reality, I probably stayed in the job too long.  The nature of work is very different out in Spain.  You have to make all your money in the summer season, which only consists of about two months.  This money has to also tide you over for the winter.  How great I hear you say, you get to have all the winter off.  Well yes that is a bonus, but when you consider just how much you earn, and in my case the limited hours you work, it is very difficult to sustain yourself for any length of time, let alone, all throughout the winter.

I am lucky enough now, to be able to take a step back, while Darrell returns to Australia, earning far more than you can here.  There are many things I want to do with my time and this is the chance I have been waiting for, to explore all new avenues open to me at this time.  With my first new column being published on Friday, I do of course have my first glimpse of the future.  I am a writer, and that is what I first and foremost want to concentrate on. This blog, Spanish Views has been noticed and that is a great thing for me.  I now have a regular slot in a magazine, expressing my views, on a number of different topics, in the main those that are expat focused, but I also have a lot more ideas for discussion.  I of course write this blog, as well as updating Bipolarcoaster and Foreverenduringcycles and am currently working on a new website that will be focused on bullying, offering help and support to people, who may have been in similar situations as myself.  

I am also applying for freelance writing jobs and others in Spain or internet based companies.  In the meantime I do want to start my tefl course in Barcelona, as soon as I can.  This will allow me to teach in Spain.  Whilst not cheap, it does offer a more secure future, long term!

I would of course like to do more writing for newspapers and magazines.  I have written much in newspapers in the past, most noticeable about the age of consent reduction in Britain, the debate surrounding it and the nonsense spouted about it by people, who really have nothing better to do with their time, than write discriminatory rubbish.
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I also have a love of poetry.  I have written many pieces in the past and often sit down and write a poem that has meaning at the time of writing.  I would like to get some more poetry published, having my first piece published in a book called 'Light of the World', in the early 1990s.
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I also have a book to finish.  Yes I am writing my memoirs, the first unedited chapter of which I include, for my readers to take a sneaky look.  I have been writing this on and off for about ten years now, so it is about time I sat down and finished it.  To be honest, so much has happened in my life over this period, I haven't been able to keep up fully, but it is now firmly at the top of my priority list!
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Then there is the continuing saga of the charity I used to work for.  I have been asked to write about what happened for a magazine, when I am able.  Whilst I am dealing with the legal ramifications, through various Government bodies, I am unable to write about it in the way I would like.  This is the reason I haven't been able to finish the 'My Story' section of this blog, but it will happen soon!

​So I do have options available to me now, I have finally semi retired, at least for a short while. Someone like me, has a lot to say and a lot to write about, so you can be sure, you will hear from me a lot more in the future, as I explore more ways to creatively write about a life I never chose!


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Resignation!

26/7/2016

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Today I have resigned from my job.  I have worked at Dunbar's for five months now. having left The Horse Charity I worked for, on the promise of earning more money in a restaurant over the summer season. In reality it didn't quite work out that way.  I enjoyed working for the Dunbar family immensely, but with only a limited number of hours a week, it has not been possible to remain working there.

Darrell will be leaving for Australia very soon, so I will be able to spend the next few weeks, with my partner before he goes, and will try and get a part time job, once he leaves.  That is important. Darrell can also earn far more money in Australia, over ten times as much, so he will be funding our home in Spain, by living in Australia, until the visa situation there changes.

The situation, whilst not ideal, will allow us to eventually be very happy and comfortably off.  

A sad day today, resigning from a job I enjoyed, but if you are not earning enough, it's time to move on!  I certainly do not want to make the same mistakes of the past, hanging on to a job, when I just need to call it a day.   
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Natalie and Mark!

21/7/2016

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Look who popped into work this morning, Natalie and Mark, two of my favourites from Gran Alacant. Always make me smile. Taking Jamie to the market and babysitting for an hour, was a blessing! 
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my adopted home of Perth, Western Australia.

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    A place to call home
    Finally, a place we can call home.  A community of like minded individuals, who used to call Britain home.  Now Spain is our choice, an altogether gentler, happier, sunnier and safer experience!
            Luke Feb 16
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