Stressed would be an understatement; I haven't stopped worrying about this move; needless to say, my blood pressure is sky high. What many people don't understand is we have been here before. I have moved abroad on two separate occasions, returning to the UK each time. The reality of our situation is, we will both be turning up, very much in the same way we did in 1995 and 1998. I don't enjoy moving around like this, far from it, I am a homebody as a rule and not the Worlds best traveller. However, I am a lot older than 24 years old now, when I first set foot on foreign soil; I am strongly of the view, that I will appreciate it a lot more than I once did.

In 2015 we left the UK, for a new life in Gran Alacant; this was a move that caused a massive amount of anxiety and stress for both of us. We had lived in Britain for over twenty years and it was hard saying goodbye to a country we loved; well I loved far more than Darrell if I am honest. Although Darrell settled in to British life well, he never fully enjoyed his experience, especially living in such a cold climate. Coming to Spain was getting away from difficult times, a stop gap if you like, before moving on again at some stage; neither of us believed it would be so soon after moving here.

As readers of this blog know, a series of unfortunate events have together made us realise, that we have to return home sooner rather than later. Darrell's Mother is suffering from cancer and is not in a great way at the moment; we think it's only right and fair to be with her at this distressing time. Darrell is an only child; his Mother is very much on her own. Once again we are both going through testing times; we need to not only restart our life, but also begin again, without a thing in the World. This is a radical clearing out; we will be left with just memories; not a bad thing, we don't need to have so much baggage!

The last few days have been brutally testing, throwing away precious items; mainly mine it has to be said; that have been carried around with me for many years.  We have argued more than ever, become angry over the slightest hicup and feel emotionally drained, I have moved around so much in my lifetime, I really just want to settle down finally.

I have been busy selling what objects I can on the 'Buy and Sell Gran Alacant' facebook page. Thankfully I have managed to offload quite a few. This is a much easier task, than it was, living in Southampton, I don't have the same level of emotional attachment to things now. The only things that are important are photographs and memories; we both need to move forwards, far away from the places we used to call home. For most people Expat life is a dream, for us it is born from a nightmare and will hopefully be our saving grace; if not we move on again!. 

I wanted to say a particular thank you to Rob, Pam from Zests husband, who has been round today helping me clear items and purchasing some for himself. I think he was amazed by the amount of stuff we still have; if he had seen us in Southampton before we came here, he would have been in shock. As I sit here typing away, looking around this emptying room, I am still amazed at the stuff I still have left; I really was a collector in every sense of the word. Today is the start of something new; something that doesn't involve collecting and weighing myself down....Actually it is quite liberating throwing everything away. Today all my my suits, ties and dress shirts headed to the bin; I'm certainly not going to need them anymore!

5 April 2018

I had a terrible nights sleep last night, thinking constantly about our two feline friends. Both Darrell and I feel so guilty about what we have done. We have never given away a pet in our life together. We are feeling particularly down, after forming a close bond with Mollie and Wildling and the reality is, it has put us off having anymore animals in the future. They didn't ask to be given away and loved unconditionally, as all animals do. They were a big part of our life and have left a void, large enough to fill a cattery. Wounds do heal in time; but with the difficulties of our current situation, we are mindful it isn't going to be a quick process.

Big hugs to you both, Darrell and I will always miss you. I hope you both have a happy and fulfilled life, as I know you will with Kayleigh; I couldn't think of a better Mum!

In case any of you didn't know, Darrell and I will be remaining in Spain, a little longer than planned. We have both decided to complete all the necessary paperwork for our settlement abroad here in Spain. This was a rather hard decision, since we had already put plans into action to move abroad. Last week all our belongings were shipped overseas and we have been left without many of the items we need on a daily basis. However the logistics of a move at this point in time were just not practical.

If I were to apply for my visa away from Europe, it was likely the whole process would have taken at least two years or more. This is a long waiting period of uncertainty for both of us to deal with, especially when one considers we will be putting our lives on hold once again. Despite being together for over twenty two years, we would still have to follow the same procedures, as a couple who have been together for two years for example. In fact we would have to do far more, because of the length of time we have been together. Submitting nearly two and a half decades of documents, would have been a mammoth undertaking, especially with only three months to complete it.

Staying in Spain, will allow us to submit the application at leisure, without the time constraints of a tourist visa, in which to complete the task. Once the visa is submitted off shore, we would have a relatively short period to wait, to gain permission allowing us to remain together as a couple outside of Spain, probably five months maximum, compared to the two years on shore.

Today I have started the task of scanning twenty three years worth of documents onto my PC, in order to submit them further down the line. This has to be the most laborious task I have ever had to tackle. Not only do I have to scan each relevant document, but I also have to scan the reverse of each page, whether it is blank or not. The red tape involved in moving to a foreign partners country is beyond belief. We have had to do this twice before; once for the UK and once for Spain, so we should be well versed in the pitfalls which we are. Nevertheless nothing prepares you for the difficulties and expense involved in the official application submission; by the end of it, will will have spend 20-30,000 dollars in total; it isn't cheap; wish me luck!

I will be returning to the UK on the 25th May as planned, just to catch up with friends and family. If you are about, feel free to catch up!

It's been another stressful few days; if I am honest Darrell and I haven't stopped arguing; it's what happens when you move! Moving abroad again for the second time in a little over two years just makes the situation even worse. Both of us are feeling the strain, far more than we did, when we left the UK for Spain in 2016; this is a 'no going back' move. We wont be returning anytime soon; there is a sense of finality about all this; endings are not something I like or enjoy.

We are nearly at the end of this grueling clearing out process and our house is looking rather bare. By the end of the month this will no longer be a home, just a place to stay before our move to foreign shores. Despite only being here for a short while, I have a fondness for Gran Alacant, it was perfect in every way. There is no time to look back now, our decision is made, it's time to move on!

Yesterday was busy; I was up early sorting out yet more paperwork, only this time for not for Spain. We had asked a friend from Gran Alacant to accompany us to Murcia, where we had to have a police check carried out, confirming that both of us have no convictions.

Darrell and I had to travel to Murcia, a large city, about 80KM from Alicante. The Ministry of Justice Office is situated in the centre, above a shop; you wouldn't even know it's there, except for the small sign outside. After handing over our passports and residencia cards, we were good to go. Due to my residency status in Spain, the Ministry will also apply to Britain for my records, killing two birds with one stone, saving me the difficulties of applying for my police check in the UK. Darrell however wasn't so lucky. Due to his non EU status, he will have to ask for his British records himself. The documents were also apostilled or legalised on site, once again saving both of us the time and effort, contacting the relevant Government department. 

This was the quickest pain free task, I have ever gone through in Spain, everything was completed in twenty minutes. We both have to wait for two weeks, to get the final documents back and then finally have all the paperwork translated into English, part of the course when you are living in a non English speaking country; apart from this formality we are nearly at the end of the process here in Spain.

Over the next few weeks, we have just a few final engagements to undertake before we leave. We need to renounce our residency status and apply for our tax refunds, so we can finally move forwards away from our continental adventure. I am of course sad to be leaving this place, but at least we can both say, we have survived the Spanish system and lived a fairly full life.