Category: Britain - Roaming Brit

From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'

The Rec Cafe - Fratton!

19/8/2023

Today I wanted to offer my congratulations to dear friend Wendy Watson and her colleague Tania Shipp, on their new venture - The Rec Café, in Fratton. Having lived and worked in Fratton for four years, I like to keep up with events there, and was delighted to come across an advertisement in The Portsmouth News, announcing the reopening of this café, after its closure in 2021.

Wendy is a fantastic friend with a big personality, and I always enjoyed her company as a patron of The Newcome Arms, when I worked behind the bar. I have many happy memories, of fun times with her and others at this local pub; it was the main stay of the local community, just as The Rec Café takes on a similar important role.

After hearing about Wendy's recent health concerns, I messaged her to give her my love and best wishes, where I also learned of her new endeavours. There comes a point in all our lives, when a change of scene and direction, is just the tonic we need, to move forward positively in life. Wendy and Tania are embarking on a new course, with all the enthusiasm you would expect, and I would like to wish them both well. I will continue to follow The Rec Café with interest and look forward to hearing about their journey together.

Fratton was an important, life affirming time for me; I worked extremely hard during some pretty challenging times. I also learnt much about other people, as well as myself, and grew exponentially as a person. Fratton is a place where you sink or swim and despite being surrounded by some wonderful characters like Wendy, ultimately, it wasn't where I was destined to end up.

I am so grateful for the friends I made while living on the south coast of England and always look forward to hearing from them. Social media has allowed me to remain a part of a community I love with all my heart; one day I look forward to once again walking down those hallowed streets of Fratton, and of course visiting The Rec Café - until then, I can, at least, view from afar.

Good luck Wendy and Tania, you'll smash it!

Forever Young, Gone Too Soon - Remembering Paul Nightingale!

22/7/2023

The death of someone, young, never fails to shock; this week another old friend passed away and memories from thirty years ago came flooding back. The older I get, the more nostalgic I become, so when someone who used to be close dies, it is important for me to not only celebrate their life, but also all those who have died long before their time.

The early 1990s was a time of exploration and discovery, as I look my first tentative steps into the gay world. As a University student, living in the lively British south coast city of Southampton, I was determined to live my life to the full. Every Friday and Saturday night, I would dress up, get drunk and hit the Magnum Club, in Clovelly Road, the same street that I lived on, in a shared house of like-minded individuals.

The Magnum club (sadly no longer with us) was my first foray into the gay scene and I have such fond, enduring memories of the place. The scene in 1993 was very different to today. In an era of high tempo dance anthems, euphoric house music, recreational drugs, liberation and hard won freedoms, being gay was still very much taboo. Celebrating our sexuality, in a safe and welcoming environment, was absolutely necessary; back then hate, and exclusion, was routine, part of the makeup of society at the time. Friends were our kin folk, in all but name, they were a substitute for our parents, brothers, sisters and Grandparents - rejection from family was commonplace; the bonds we formed then have, in many cases, lasted the test of time.

Paul Nightingale, whose life I remember today, was part of our close circle of friends. We met through hedonistic nights of unmitigated chaos in a club, which represented my sense of purpose - fun and living life to the extreme. Paul was genuine, thoughtful, highly intelligent and extremely loving. He was a scene regular, at the club and the after parties that followed - part of the fabric of a scene that sought to protect its Brethren and nurture in the most difficult of circumstances.

As we partied the nights away on the top floor of The Magnum, friendships inevitably formed. Hugs, community spirit, gay family and a feeling of belonging to something bigger than ourselves, all played a part in the formation of deeply emotional attachments. These affiliations struck a chord with me particularly, growing up at an extremely poignant time of change! Paul was part of a wider group of people who offered unconditional acceptance, as many of us struggled with our sexuality, mental health and relationships. He was also a fellow student and an outrageously charismatic personality, who never failed to entertain. Paul was a gentle soul who just wanted to be part of something better.

When I heard of Paul's passing a little over a week ago, another part of me died inside. He is yet another loss from an unforgettable time, that sowed the seeds for the rest of my life in the UK. He is another old friend from that indelible period, who has died far too soon, and the pain never gets any easier to bear. Deep down, I can't help feeling the self-indulgent excesses of the 1990s, may well have played a part, in the long list of lives lost over the years. Equally, I am fully aware of my own mortality and the transient nature of life itself. Someone once asked me if I had any regrets about growing up gay when I did, and I replied, quite adamantly, 'No!' How could I, I wouldn't have met the wonderful characters I have, nor forged the friendships I continue to build on, day after day, 30 years later. Most importantly, I wouldn't have the memories I made, unfaltering in their significance and auspicious in their nature! People live as they think fit, die when their time is up, and the rest of us are left behind.

It has been many years since I last saw Paul, but that doesn't detract from how I feel about his death. In my eyes, Paul will be forever young - colourful, playful, joyous and special; a boy who I regarded as a friend even when he wasn't there. His presence was a continued link to the past, so fragile today, made even more frangible after each and every passing. His loss is a time to remember what he meant to all those who knew him over the years, and the extinguishing of a light that shone so brightly, even during the darkest of days. Rest in peace, dear Paul, we will never see your like again!

Ten Months in Australia, Twelve Months of Change!

24/6/2023

It really does feel like I’ve been here years, but in reality, today is my ten-month anniversary living in Australia. When we completed our trip to ASIA, neither Darrell nor I could have envisaged where we would be today; a far cry from our life in the UK. A year ago, living in Portsmouth, we were planning our move to Australia in record time. Both of us, would have preferred more time in Britain before leaving in the most difficult of circumstances, but nothing worked out the way we planned and the turmoil that was plaguing our life, finally forced our hand. At the time I was angry, bitter and totally hurt by what had transpired; today I am thankful to family members who really showed their true colours and ultimately released us from a life that only heald us back. Today we are free and it is all thanks to them.

Our trip to Croatia, to see Darrell's family, was the tonic both of us needed after spending so long surrounded by vitriol, hostility and contempt. Vlatka and Marin, our Croatian Cousins, were welcoming, accepting and full of warmth; we spent a week reconnecting with people who we hadn’t seen for what seemed like a lifetime; rekindling important family bonds was an important part of our journey.

Our time in Dalmatia, offered a breathing space to think about the new life we were embarking upon and the future we planned in Australia, that still seemed uncertain. We were very fortunate to have such valuable time with our Cousins; it was them who put everything into perspective and made us remember there was life after disaffection and happiness after rejection.

After Croatia, we travelled to Thailand, which afforded both Darrell and me, a welcome break, during a period when we needed it most. This was one of the most memorable holidays we have ever been on and offered an opportunity to relax, regroup and rebuild, ahead of a gruelling few months in Australia. Neither of us knew what the future held, so it was important to just savour the moment, forget about what had brought us to the other side of the World and just enjoy Thailand and the wondrous sites that surrounded us in Bangkok. Darrell and I let ourselves go and gradually the bad memories faded; the sites, sounds and vibrant colours of Asia were the distraction, dreams were made of – a precursor to a new life together!

Returning to Australia was a challenge; I had tried to live in Perth twice before, without success, so I was extremely apprehensive about this next big step. Despite my fear for the future, I was aware this was a last chance for both Darrell and me, if this didn’t work, I had no idea what would happen next. Neither of us wanted to return to the UK, so the same determination that allowed me to shed 25 kg a year before, would be the basis for my focus, as I adjusted to living in yet another country, the third in five years.

Australia was the chance to do things right, to make up for all the stupidity and raucous behaviour of the past and create a more prosperous future. There were no guarantees; judging on previous experience there was only a slim chance of success, but with nothing to lose I personally threw my heart and soul into this adventure and did everything I could to stay. Of course at fifty-one years old, under normal circumstances, I really shouldn’t be here. When my application for permanent residency was lodged, I was mindful of just how lucky I was to have the chance to settle down under. Not many people my age are afforded the opportunity to do that. At the back of my mind, after all the paperwork, documentation and legal wrangling, I was still unsure what my fate would be. After all, at my age, any number of issues could stop me from achieving residency; my life now rested with the Australian Government – I wasn’t feeling particularly hopeful.

It took two and a half months to get permanent residency; it would have been shorter, if I hadn’t made mistakes during the application process. Nevertheless, surprisingly, my route to eventual citizenship was secured. After a comprehensive physical exam, no health issues were detected, and my past indiscretions as a teenage boy most certainly weren’t an issue with the Department of Home Affairs. After 28 years together, Darrell and I could finally start living again.

The months since I was grated indefinite leave to remain in Australia have been kind to Darrell and me. I suppose this has been the most productive period of my life. I am Manager of a large retail outlet store, selling Manchester. (the Australian word for bedlinen) I am earning more than double what I did in the UK and with Darrell also on a similar wage, we no longer have the worries we did. We managed to put a large deposit down on a three-bedroom villa, and we are now the proud owners of a lovely new home. Saving money, saving for a pension and thinking about buying another property to rent out is top of my priority list. As I establish myself in Perth, for the first time in my life I have a purpose, a reason to live and a goal to reach. Australia has opened doors that Britain never could, and for that I am truly grateful.

Despite my new zest for life away from the doom and gloom of the UK, there is still a feeling of sadness. I am upset at the way we were treated in Portsmouth before we left, by people we used to love, but most importantly I am grieving the friends and my Father I have left behind. Dad has become very important to me since leaving Britain, he is the only real family I have left, so our weekly chats are important. His encouragement to continue focusing on the future has also been instrumental in us staying in Australia; his support has been a great source of comfort.

Equally, friends have become the linchpin that keeps us grounded in our new life. Letters, messages and phone calls have all been pivotal in the success we now enjoy. Words of love, video calls from the close and a collective network of friends from back home have been a link to people who enrich and continue to enhance our life thousands of miles away. Our future is in Australia, not because we wanted to leave, but because ultimately it was where we are meant to be. Our destiny was always to return to Perth one day, the future is here for the taking, it’s up to us to make it work!

Important reminders of a past that has so firmly shaped my future!

27/5/2023

I suppose this was the week winter really began to bite here in Australia. Of course winters down under are not the same as they are back home; there are no freezing temperatures, ice and snow, but there is a distinct chill in the air, and already I am feeling the bite. I have never been a person who enjoys this time of year, feeling the cold more than most, which is one of the reasons I moved to Australia in the first place. However, Australia does have seasons like the UK; it is a fact of life I just have to live with. Suitably wrapped up warm, Darrell and I have already been discussing a move to a country on the equator, without the winter we both detest. That is a long way in the future for now but we can of course keep dreaming, as we have done all our lives!

Surprisingly for me, it has rained a lot, more than I expected. I have never experienced Australia in all its seasons, so I didn't really know what to expect; in a homage to Britain, the heavens opened, and it chucked it down, sometimes for days on end. Despite the wet, if I am perfectly honest, it really hasn't been that cold. I think I feel the chill now, more than ever, because my body has acclimatised to the Aussie weather and as Darrell reminded me recently, we haven't really experienced a winter for a long time, having been travelling since leaving the UK in September 2022.

It is important for me to stay in contact with those closest back home and since I have moved to Australia, I have made a conscious effort to speak to friends and family as often as I can. Luckily, with the wonders of social media, it is far easier than it once was. In 1995, when I first lived in Perth, my relationships with people back home suffered greatly. Without facetime, video calls and heavily reliant on an intermittent dial-up connection, it became virtually impossible to keep in contact with people on a regular basis. It is one of the reasons I ended up moving back to the UK in the first place. Today I am happy and content, knowing I can just pick up my phone and speak to my dearest and dearest on a mobile device. This has allowed me to settle into expat life down under as easy as I did in Spain, and I don't feel as homesick as I did 27 years ago.

My Father is the most important person in my life, along with Darrell, and I am fully aware of his advancing age. Dad is very nearly 75 now, and I do try and stay in contact as much as I did back in Britain. Once a week, usually on a Sunday, I ring Dad, as I always have done, and we chat for an hour or so. Like me, he discusses his ailments and day-to-day life in the UK, especially politics. This link to home is important to me, as I integrate into Australian society, knowing my roots and hearing about the little sleepy market town I used to call home, makes me feel part of something bigger. I may well be a village boy at heart, but the choices I have made today are far removed from where I grew up in the 1970s and 80s. Having said that, I have never forgotten where I come from, and my Father often mentions places and people who are now all but a distant memory, but an important reminder of the past that has so firmly shaped my future.

This week, I have also heard from my old colleague and dear friend Sue, who sent me an 'emergency Coronation package' from the UK. Despite King Charles III being the Head of State in Australia, there was very little fan fare for the crowning of our new King. I did manage to find one shop selling some Royal memorabilia and duly bought myself a mug, but otherwise there was little to welcome the new Monarch.

However, Sue put together a jiffy bag full of all the things I love, commenting on the 'over the top spectacle' taking place back home and how she knew I would love some mementoes from Britain in the post. There was a Coronation programme, some new King Charles 50 pence pieces and my favourite, a Coronation Tesco carrier bag. It was wonderful to receive a little slice of Tesco here in Australia, a company I thoroughly enjoyed working for.

Whether speaking on the phone, seeing familiar faces online or on a mobile phone, or indeed receiving a letter in the post, I am always so happy to hear from friends. Darrell and I may well have been through testing times in the UK, but the people who really matter have been so warm and supportive, and they continue to play a very important role in our life. Life in Australia is so much quieter than we are used to, but knowing mates are just a phone call away has helped us adjust to this new expat existence.

Between working, Darrell and I have been concentrating on the new house. It has been a very long time since we owned our own home, so we are spending most of our time renovating and buying new furniture. One has to remember we turned up in Australia with just a couple of suitcases, so we are having to build our life from scratch - daunting yes, but fun nonetheless.

This week we had to have new taps fitted in the kitchen, after the old ones sprung a leak on Sunday. Yup, that's right, just as we were about to sit down to our Sunday roast, water started pouring everywhere, and we had to call out an emergency Plummer. $748 later after frantically trying to find the water meter and isolation switch, we had a new set of taps and some rather bruised hands, trying to stop the water gushing out all over the kitchen - oh the joys of owning your own home.

With Darrell on holiday this week, we have had a new bed delivered for one of the spare rooms and have managed to get it looking a bit more respectable. It isn't finished by any means, but it is looking a hundred percent better. Ideally I want to replace the carpets throughout the house, but they will have to wait until finances allow, so for now we will make do with what we have.

Today we were also given a quote to replace the rotten fence in the back garden. We had hoped it could have been fixed, but it is too far gone. In consultation with the Strata we will have to replace the whole fence with a colour bond alternative; this should cost about $2500, according to the local fencer we have asked to do the job. This is far less than I expected, and I should have the money to do the job in a few weeks. These days we are working with our own cash and no credit. After building up huge debts in the past, it is the last thing I want to do now.

With three days off, Darrell and I did manage to spend some time away from our life in Midland. We spent a lovely morning in Perth city. We actually haven't done this together for a good three months, with our lives consumed with work and house renovations.

Morning coffee and cake at the Westralia Dome Café, followed by a spot of shopping and lunch at The Shoe in Yagan Square, was just what the Doctor ordered. It did feel good to be happy and relaxed for a change, something we really should do more often. It will be a while before we can do it again, however, especially with expenses mounting - new fence, drainpipes and new rates bill about to drop in the mailbox. Still it was a perfect day, surprisingly sunny and there was no, yes no rain, who could ask for more.

The end of another week beckons; each day that passes, Australia feels more like home. Both of us have everything we ever wanted and are so thankful for the opportunities we have been given here. I am glad we embarked on this journey eight months ago and look forward to the future with happiness in the main. With friends and family so far away, there will always be a tinge of sadness, but they understand the decisions we made, and we are aware of just what has to be done. We will both keep on striving for success and will not look back; life is indeed for living, so we will make sure we live it well, just as I'm sure all of you will too.

Thanks for staying the course, thanks for your continued support!

The Coronation of Charles and Camilla - The future of the Monarchy!

7/5/2023

When I left the UK, a little over seven months ago, I could never have expected, the monumental changes that have happened to the Great British Monarchy. Sitting on the Makarska promenade, overlooking the Adriatic, along the Dalmatian coast, I discovered our late Queen had died. As an ardent Monarchist, I immediately felt a sense of sadness, that I hadn't felt since the death of Princess Diana in 1997. This was the beginning of the Carolean era and the end of a reign that had spanned seventy years.

It is difficult to put into words how I felt about King Charles in September 2022, because I, like most people of my generation, have a conflict of interest. I have never forgotten the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, in that Paris car crash, in the early hours of Sunday morning, 26 years ago. Watching her emotional funeral on television, I remember how angry I felt towards the then Prince of Wales and how I could never forgive him for what he had done to the people's 'Queen of Hearts.'

A lot has happened during the intervening years; the woman who was the 'third person' in the marriage of Charles and Diana, was now Queen, and the bitterness felt towards Camilla has all but disappeared. Even I have changed my opinion of the Royal couple; as I watched the Coronation on television, I felt content that our new King and Queen would be an asset for Britain, as I put my feelings on the death of Diana to one side.

HM The King appears happy with Camilla, in a way he never was with Diana. As hard as it is to admit, the new King and Queen seem like a perfect match. Their body language, affection and etiquette, towards each other, is that of a happily married couple. If they had been allowed to marry all those years ago and others hadn't interfered in their relationship, things may well have been very different. The arranged marriage with Princess Diana was a disaster because there was no love between them, very different to what you see today.

There was no public holiday in Australia yesterday, and I finished work, just as the King and Queen left Buckingham Palace to travel to Westminster Abbey. I rushed home as quick as I could, to settle down and watch the Coronation. With a tinny, plate of Chicken and Chorizo and Cherry ripe for desert, I watched this blend of the ancient and modern unfold before me. I was awestruck at the spectacle; feeling emotional watching the beautiful service, my Monarchist credentials were well and truly confirmed. This was unlike anything I had seen before; like most people alive today, this was the first Coronation I had witnessed, and I was transfixed at the historic occasion. This was my homeland doing what it does best, and I wasn't disappointed.

As someone who understands the historic significance of the coronation and the institution it represents, I was delighted to be able to pay my respects to our new King and Queen, who have, and continue to, work tirelessly for the Commonwealth, charities and country I once called home. Their service and duty is without question and without a doubt, they are the future of the Monarchy and a link to a past, rich in history and symbolism. The King's continued commitment, is the bond that connects the British people together, in a way no elected Head of State could ever do. They are the embodiment of a country that I will always call home, and also the King and Queen of Australia, where I have chosen to live.

Reflecting on such a historic occasion, has allowed me to remember important milestones in my own life and the opportunities afforded to me as a result. The King and Queen have large shoes to fill, but they are now both in a position to make things happen. The Monarchy will change and adapt during King Charles reign, of that I am sure. Despite his advancing age, Charles, like his Father before him, was always a moderniser, but he must be careful not to go too far. Modernise the institution of which you are head, but keep the elements that allow it to flourish and grow, at the centre of its existence. My fear is, any streamlining of the Royal Family will go too far, and we will be left with a mere shadow of the past. The Monarchy's appeal is in the mystique it portrays, not in the power it wields; for that reason, the King must remember the journey that brought him to the throne, and respect the heritage that is indicative of its success!

Like everyone, I wish the new King and Queen well; it is time to embrace Charles for all his faults and, most importantly Camilla, as his loving wife. History is littered with the failures of the past, let's not let that happen to an institution that sits at the very heart of the British psyche. As a Brit, the King has a special place in my heart, as his Mother did before; I am happy to pledge my allegiance to His Majesty and hopeful for the future that pledge represents!

Celebrating Eight Years of Blogging!

8/4/2023

Eight years ago, I was trying to make sense of traumatic events that were shaping my world. 2015 was not the greatest year of my life, but it was, however, one that would teach me much about people and the lengths they will go to, to cause harm to others. Darrell and I went through a torrid time; abused and attacked by people we thought were friends and colleagues, we made a life-changing decision to leave Britain and restart our life far away from the nightmare engulfing our every waking hour.

We both had good jobs, worked hard, and did our best to help others when we could. We had a lot of people around us, some good, some bad, but as we stumbled through that painful thing called life, we felt happy and secure with the characters that made up our close circle of friends. These were positive people in the main, and as our circumstances changed, and my health began to suffer, we were lucky enough to have the support of some truly amazing individuals.

It was difficult to understand what was happening to me, and even harder to determine just who to trust. I was aware that something strange was happening, but I just couldn’t understand what. Writing down my thoughts and feelings, was a way of coming to terms with situations that were beyond my control. It allowed me to express my emotions in a way I wouldn't otherwise have been able to. The turmoil that was overwhelming me, was difficult to fathom, but by documenting events, I could begin to discover the reasons behind my immense feeling of sadness.

I have written much about that time in 2015 - not all of it legible, much of it rambling, and all of it difficult to reread. The bullying that made me who I am today, had been methodically collated in abraded unedited paragraphs, that painted a picture of mistreatment and intimidation. Even today, I haven’t read my original blog; the trauma I suffered is just too recent, and the effects too raw.

The decisions Darrell and I made in 2015 were the catalyst for a journey we are both still on today. After a life spent together in the UK, we decided to sell up, move away and leave Britain for good. After our marriage in September 2015, we embarked on a new life in Spain, and the darkness that surrounded my first blog all but disappeared. I continued to write about the confusing occurrences, that prompted our departure with gusto, but my melancholia had turned into anger and rage at what had happened. In beautiful, idyllic surroundings, I was able to sit with a clear head, and finally understand just what brought me to Spain.

Spain was an enlightening experience, it finally gave me a reason to live again. I was the happiest I had been in a long time and the stress and depression of 2015 gradually began to diminish and dwindle, finally subsiding into obscurity, as my new life in Gran Alacant became my priority.

Writing about my adventure on the Costa Blanca became a cleansing and cathartic exercise. Each day, I wrote about the mundane aspects of Spain, the cost of living, friends and the milestones that became so important, as I integrated into Expat life. Even when Darrell had to return home to Australia, while his Mother went through treatment for cancer, I still wrote - engaging, contented words linked to a country and a dream I could finally call home. This was the most free I had felt in years, and I was finally doing what I wanted, not what others expected me to do.

Our Spanish dream was not meant to be, and I was just grateful to have lived there, for as long as I did. As Darrell's Mother got worse and my Mum was taken into hospital, we left Gran Alacant, Darrell returning to Australia, me moving in with my Aunt in the UK, to be close to my Mum during the final years of her life. I was back in a Country I despised, but surrounded by loved ones, and I made the most of what I had left.

I spend four productive years in Portsmouth, surviving against all the odds, building up a substantial amount of money during the pandemic and working in a job I loved. Even while working, often long unsociable hours, I was able to keep writing and documenting some truly historic times. The streets were empty, businesses were closed, and I explored a city I knew little about, despite being born there in 1971.

The years I spent with family were bitter-sweet. In the main, they were good; I got to know my Aunt and Cousins well and loved every minute I spent with them. All of them gave me a reason to live, especially when Darrell was trapped in Australia at the height of the pandemic. I celebrated some important landmarks with my kin folk, my 25th wedding anniversary and my 50th Birthday and despite the sadness I felt, not having Darrell with me, I was content with family who supported and loved me.

Like most good things in life, times changed, and the fruitful, hard-working period I enjoyed in Portsmouth turned sour. Suddenly, the people I loved were no longer there. Affection turned to hate and resentment and by the time Darrell returned to the UK, my days in Portsmouth were already numbered. Once again, my blogging turned dark as unhappiness and dejection became the prominent feature in my life. It was time to move on and leave the past behind. Even the ones you love the most can hurt you, but I wasn’t in the mood for forgiveness, and I am glad to be away from people who made my final months in the UK some of the most hurtful and miserable in my life.

Of course, it didn’t all end so badly; I made some amazing friends in Portsmouth who will always be with me. They were the saving grace and a reason to write happy and uplifting thoughts, even during the most upsetting of times. The closing few weeks before we left for Australia were filled with love, laughter and unforgettable memories; everything else didn’t matter any more. We could leave with our heads held high on the final leg of our eight-year journey and a desire to finally be free.

When faced with unsurmountable challenges, Darrell and I always walk away. Both of us hate confrontation and with the stability that kept us together as a family crumbling, it was once again time to say goodbye. Australia is the final stop on a deeply personal and challenging eight years. When I decided to start blogging in 2015, I could never have predicted where I would be today. In April 2023, Darrell and I are living the quiet life down under; both of us have fantastic jobs and have bought a new home together. As our eyes look towards the future, I remember the immortal words I wrote all those years ago ‘ live life better, achieve everything you desire and don’t let the bad times destroy your future.’ We have done this unreservedly and continue to strive for prosperity in this unforgiving World!

... And finally, I would like to wish all my readers a very happy Easter, and thank you for your continual support!

Revisiting The Past From Afar!

5/3/2023

Me and Lee circa 1976

I've been away from the UK for six months now, and I often think of home. Understandably, I am not missing that little island in the North Sea in the traditional sense; I literally can't stand what Britain has become, and that is a bit of a shock for me. I feel a little bit detached from the memories I made over the years, the people who were a part of my life and most importantly the childhood that made me the person I am today.

There are many aspects of my childhood I didn't like; coming of age in a small provincial market town on the south coast of England, was not a barrel of laughs, especially during the 1980s. However, the good outweighed the bad, and there is much more that resonates fondly with me, than not, even today in my fifties. Yes, I did have my problems, but in the main my recollections are of happy times, full of laughter, surrounded by friends and loved ones. Enjoying lazy, long summer days, we played outside until the sun went down, and the street lights came on.

I have written a lot about my childhood throughout this blog. 'Short Stories From My Youth,' documents my early years, as a small boy finding my way in the World. Living thousands of miles away in Australia, I often think of my roots, even though I would rather forget the more challenging aspects of an era that certainly wasn't easy.

Relocating to Australia in the past was difficult; during the 1990s there wasn't the access to internet as there is today and staying in contact with friends and family was hard. I became extremely lonely and withdrawn and returned to the UK relatively quickly, when in reality I should have stayed; how amazing my life would be today if I had remained in Perth back then. Today I am reliving that original journey, only this time with enthusiasm and determination. Most importantly, I am in constant contact with people back home, and that is keeping me here, sane and content.

As I child I lived in a social housing complex on the edge of the south coast town of Fareham, a short walk from my families village of Titchfield. I have mainly positive memories from my time living here and most importantly, I was never lonely. Nashe House, as it was called, was filled with young families and children of the same age. My next door neighbour, Lee, was my closest friend at the time, and we would often play together outside. Our front doors were always left open, we were in and out of each other's flat all day; the community of which we were all apart was welcoming, giving and always there to give support when needed. None of us were rich, this was the 1970s, after all. What little we had, we gave gladly, and there was a sense of belonging in a way that doesn't exist today.

My old next door neighbour Lee has been in constant contact since I moved to Australia, and for that I am truly grateful. He has messaged consistently, and we often talk about the lives we once shared, a lifetime ago. Lee is a link to the past that I wouldn't otherwise have, and he has helped me adjust to Australian life, just by knowing he is there, echoing the memories we made together as children. His friendship has been instrumental in keeping me grounded and focused, as I restart my life in Australia, and that is something I am truly grateful for.

Let me be honest, I haven't kept in contact with many people since leaving school; I had very few good friends at that time, and if anything I was glad to walk away through the school gate on that final day. It is only because of the advent of social media, that I have managed to interact with school friends and those I lived with in Nashe House. Had I been born even a few years before, I am not entirely sure if I would be in contact with anyone from that period today. For that reason, Facebook, Instagram and the like have helped me communicate with those I would have ordinarily lost contact with.

Lee's Mum still lives in the neighbourhood, and he visits her often. To be honest, I wish I had spent more time with my Mother before she died, but we can always look back with hindsight and think 'what if?' Last week, he visited his Mum as usual and sent me photographs of the community, I used to call home. Apart from a brief visit, I haven't been there in many years, and it brought back so many memories, seeing it, as it is today.

When I was a child, everything seemed so big. The block of flats where I lived appeared vast; I remember looking up to the balcony above our front door, head spinning, feeling dizzy, at the sheer height of the 70s brick structure above. Just outside our small front garden, the dedicated washing area, where residents hung their clothes to dry, was an arena to play and make memories. The rolling green fields of the school opposite flowed infinitely down to the old railway bridge, where I used to forage for blackberries with Mum and Dad as a child. The surrounding houses and shops, offered a chance to explore, finding new hiding places, adventures and journey's to fulfil.

This was a time of wonderment and finding my place in the World, but it was also a period to push boundaries and see just how far I could go. As children, we were always looking to towards each new day with enthusiasm and awe. Without a care in the World, life flowed like water off a ducks back.

Lee's photographs conjured up an explosion of nostalgia and remembrance. Reflections of an innocent time, free from stress and worry, came flooding back. Laid bare before me, were photographs of my juvenescence, forty-five years in the future. I vaguely remember different scenarios related to these modern day digital photographs, but I don't recognise the run down nature of a neighbourhood that used to be so well-kept and looked after.

Lee and I grew up at a time before technology, before mobile phones and computers; we used our imaginations, rather than websites and search engines and enjoyed an outdoor life, going from neighbour to neighbour. There was no fear or hate towards the residents in our locality, just respect, regard and recognition towards our extended family next door. This was the decade before the 'rot set in,' and all of us lived happily side by side. This is the part of Britain I miss every day, but wherever I live in the World, those sentimental, wistful anecdotes will always be a product of the past. I can recall these narratives in my home town or my adopted home of Perth, it just takes a friend like Lee to jog the old grey matter occasionally.

I am glad to have grown up when I did, at a less complicated, more simpler time. The people who remained in my life were the important ones. Happily, I am in contact with my old childhood friend Lee during a period of great upheaval, when I need his words more than at any other time. As I adjust to life down under, it is good to know my past still plays a part in my future direction; without retrospection and foresight, I would surely make the same mistakes again!

Tesco's End - Farewell to a faithful old friend!

29/1/2023

This week, I have finally said a fond farewell to my job at Tesco. After nearly five years, I emailed my letter of resignation on Friday, ending what was probably the most productive period of my life in Britain. This was the hardest decision I had to make, but the reality is, my lifestyle break had come to an end, when I started a full time job here in Australia. The contract dictates the steps I had to take under such circumstances and with a little bit of prompting from my now ex-boss Sammy, I handed in my notice with immediate effect. Sammy was instrumental in ensuring I was able to take such an important career break in the first place; after some deeply painful days in Britain before we left, she was there offering support when I needed it most. Without her, our success now, may well have ended very differently and for that I will always be grateful!

The truth is, I hate goodbyes, and this was one I really didn't want to say. I understand I haven't been working in Fratton for five months now, but by holding on to the possibility, I may return to my job one day, I was somewhat comforted. You may well call it a safety net, or just not wanting to let go, but for me, it was about holding on to the good times and life enhancing memories that I made, everyday I went to work, behind the customer Service Desk. There were no bad shifts, although in reality there probably were, but nothing to speak of, and I always thoroughly enjoyed my time at Tesco; luckily for me, I will always look back at my time with fondness and there aren't many jobs you can say that about.

I don't think I have every really worked somewhere quite like it; the people were the most generous, giving and open bunch I have ever met and all of them felt like the family I needed at that time. Most people spoke of the friendly atmosphere and just how well colleagues got on with one another, but it wasn't until I left in September 2022, at the beginning of my journey to Australia, that I realised just how much I was going to miss the place.

I have to be honest now, and I know some of you won't appreciate it, but there isn't much I am going to miss about Fratton. I never enjoyed living there and would never want to live there again, but the friends I made, the generosity of spirit you see in the people from Tesco and indeed Fratton as a whole, is truly heart-warming. This was a community that treated everyone with respect and dignity, no matter what their background, and the enduring memories I made will stay with me for the rest of my life.

When I look back to my departure and those last few weeks at Tesco, I don't think I have ever felt more loved in my life. These were my family in all but name, they gave me everything I needed - from a shoulder to cry on, advice and direction, or a place to crash if the worst came to the worst. My colleagues, no, my FRIENDS, were there encouraging me, every step of the way, and I will miss them all, especially now everything is so final!

My time at Tesco coincided with some momentous events, not only in my life, but also in the history of the World. I started working there after returning from Spain, while Darrell was in Australia caring for his Mother. When I needed support, the team were there for me. It was never a chore going into work, in fact if you ask anyone who worked there, I was more often than not, early, so I could chat with friends. This was just what I needed, as I tried to build a life temporarily without my husband. This sense of belonging became even more crucial when the pandemic took hold in 2020; all of us bonded in a way that would have been unthinkable before.

Working through the worst public health crisis in a hundred years was often scary, especially during the early days, when none of us knew just how bad things would get. I remember working on the desk, which looked more like a bunker, with fruit and veg crates piled in front, as a barrier between customers and us. There was no PPE or sanitizer initially, and Tesco did everything they could to ensure our safety; these were times of great anxiety and stress, but they were also days of comradeship, laughter and music.

As shops closed, theatres were boarded up, pubs, music venues and places of entertainment shut their doors, Tesco remained open. Things were very different, of course, but we hosted events on those great occasions that would normally see people celebrating in the streets. From VE day to Christmas, we all did our best to make sure customers enjoyed their time; after all, we were the only stores open in this new dystopian World. Supermarkets were crucial as key workers like me made our way to work every day, through deserted, empty streets, to serve customers and hopefully brightening their day.

Today I am lucky to include many customers as friends, born out of the pandemic and the respect we showed for one another. From the Fox Lady, Joanne and her multicoloured hair, and the dear late Mrs Fisher, who I talked with throughout the pandemic, until her death just over a year ago. Together with colleagues, Managers and all those on Front End Support, I had the best four and a half years of my life.

I have shed a tear or two, as I moved across the World, which is only natural. Things will never really be the same again. I am, however, aware of where my future lies, but I am also mindful of where my journey began. The World was just a little bit sweeter at Tesco and I laughed just a little bit more; I hugged so much better (even throughout the pandemic, naughty I know) and I was just a little bit, yes just a little bit happier, in a job I loved more than any other that had gone before.

I leave behind people I love and always will, the memories of a special time in my life, friends like you wouldn't believe and of course my biggest, bestest, loveliest friend of all - Jules, my big Brother, forever, and someone I wish I'd got to know better. Nevertheless, we will always be there for each other, as much as we can, and when the time is right I'll be back in Fratton, sharing the love; picking up from where I left off, the day I closed my locker door, rekindling the nostalgia I will always feel!

Dedicated to Jules, my Brother from another Mother!

Year in Review 2022!

27/12/2022

Wow, what a year it has been for both me and Darrell. So much has happened in such a small space of time, I just don't know where to begin. I suppose I should start at the beginning - Darrell had been back in the UK for just a few short months and both of us were planning a future together in Portsmouth, in the aftermath of a pandemic that had conspired to keep us apart for nearly two years.

We were pretty happy and sorted at the beginning of 2022. Both of us were working in jobs we loved and were discussing the possibility of buying a home together for the first time in many years. The pandemic had been kind to us at least, and we had saved up a substantial amount of money for a deposit, but it just wasn't enough for somewhere big enough for our needs. To be honest, when I look back, I don't think either of us really wanted to live in a pokey one-bedroom flat, in a city we just couldn't call our own. I'm not sure if that sounds completely right, but what I am trying to say is, it never really felt like home. It didn't have the memories needed to form an emotional attachment. Although I had some strong friendships, keeping that connection alive, ultimately it wasn't enough to keep us in this famous naval city, on the south coast of England.

Darrell was working hard at Cancer Research in a job he loved. His boss and my friend Zerina was instrumental in keeping us both in Portsmouth for as long as we were there. She is one of my closest and dearest friends and a lady I hold in the highest regard. She has helped both me and Darrell out more times than I care to remember. Her advice has been invaluable, and she was a huge presence in both our lives. I don't think I have ever seen Darrell so happy in his work, as he was there, and he really put his heart and soul into a position he loved. Back then, I was sure we would stay in Portsmouth for the rest of our days.

Equally, I was thoroughly enjoying my position at Tesco, as I had done since I started there in 2018. In many ways, I had become part of the furniture and had settled into my role with ease. For the first time in many years, I had formed close friendships with some truly remarkable characters. These were the lifeline that kept me going when Darrell was away, and they held me together, while living a rather frugal existence in Portsmouth.

My colleagues on the Customer Service desk where I worked were such a close-knit group, it was always going to be a wrench leaving them behind under any circumstances, let alone what transpired later in the year. Together with my closest friend Jules, this was the World I wanted to keep, grasp tightly and not want to let go!

Jules was normally the first person I saw every morning, forever smiling, consistently welcoming and invariably so full of life. We talked about everything and anything, and he is the nearest to the Brother I have never really had. Our bond grew especially close during my last year in the UK, and I really don't think I would have survived those final days in Portsmouth without him. He was a shoulder to cry on, an encyclopedia of advice and always, just always that little bit 'extra gay'. Every morning we saw one another, we would always have the biggest bear hug and make sure to end our morning natter before work by saying those immortal words 'be extra gay today,' as we did every day, bringing a little bit of sunshine into an otherwise drab, dull world.

Of course nothing was quite as it seemed and although my work life was the best it had ever been, things at home were not working out. I had lived with my Aunt for four years and thoroughly enjoyed my time there. She was, in all but name, Mum, especially after my Mother died in 2019. My Aunt, Darrell and I all got on well in the same house, and it was an arrangement that worked perfectly for the most part. I suppose I became complacent and took our living situation for granted, believing things would carry on very much in the same vein, even when the danger signs were there.

Her son and my Cousin moved back into the family home in the middle of the year and despite a rocky start, things worked fine. I have always had a close bond with my Cousin, and in many respects he reminds me of myself. I'm not saying everything was a bed of roses, but we all learned to live under the same roof amicably and life continued as it had done before. Darrell and I did keep ourselves to ourselves a lot more, but I believe deep down we already knew it was time to leave.

Things came to a head after an uncalled-for family intervention. This was an unnecessary interference into what was essentially a personal matter, problems that just needed to be ironed out and boundaries set. As is the case in many families, talking seems to take a back seat, as situations spiral out of control, everyone burying their head in the sand, hoping issues will just go away. Both Darrell and I are as guilty of that as anyone. Sometimes it takes an argument to brings things to the fore and make us realise there is more to life.

My Cousin Rachel is one of the most honest up front people you will ever meet and despite a rather heated exchange of views, both Darrell and I were glad things were said as they were. This was a row that all three of us would have sorted out, no matter what the outcome, and we just expected things to return to normal. Like best laid plans of mice and men, it didn't work out that way, and an unwarranted text from someone who had not even witnessed the argument, suggesting Darrell and I should consider our position in Portsmouth, finally put the nail in the coffin.

We both decided, after receiving the text, that it was time to go. When people start digging the knife in, without a thought for no one but themselves, let alone two people who had done nothing but help, we knew our time was up. For our own sanity and peace of mind, we had to leave. There was no point staying somewhere where neither of us were wanted. This was a sad ending to our time in Portsmouth, but it also gave us an insight into what some people are really like. When a leopard finally shows its spots and the abuse starts flowing, it is time to head for the hills and not look back.

I will forever be thankful to my Aunt for taking me in at a particularly difficult point in my life. I will also always love my Cousins Rachel and Joe and their respective extended families. However, when I look back, I suppose I was never really a part of their lives anyway; I lived very much on the side lines, and both Darrell and I were quite happy to go back to 'us against the World,' and avoid family ties altogether - it's how we work best.

Initially we just walked away from a situation that had become toxic, but after a chat with my Aunt we returned to see if we could repair the damage that had been done. Despite getting closer to my Cousin Joe, spending a memorable last few months with him, we just couldn't see a future in that house with my family, and we decided to return to Australia and give this place one last chance. This was not an easy decision to make, but as I watched the decline of Britain on the news, and my own personal issues bubbling away, the warning signs were there; I knew it was something we had to do.

I spoke to my employer, who was amazing and fully supported my decision to take a 'lifestyle break' for a year, leaving the option to return to my job on the table, should everything fail down under. I couldn't thank my Manager Sammy enough for all she did for me at that time. Without her, I would have just walked out of Tesco and been left high and dry in the worst of circumstances. Her advice and help ensured a smooth transition to a new life in Australia.

The last month in Britain was a double-edged sword. This was a time I cemented friendships in a way I hadn't before. I had so many leaving parties, I lost count of the number of times I said goodbye, but these were people who wanted to give us a memorable send-off and show just how much they cared. I was on an emotional rollercoaster, and many tears flowed over the weeks before we left. Many of those who waved us on our way have kept in contact and continue to wish us well. All of them made our departure that much harder, and there were times I really thought about staying, but pulled myself back from the brink and continued to strive for a better future in Perth.

The hardest person to leave behind was Jules, tears really did flow on my final day. After all the planning, arranging of flights, hotels and travel, nothing can prepare you for actually saying goodbye to someone close, akin to family. Jules will always be in my life, I will make sure of that. I video call him when I can and message him often. My life is a little darker without him in it, and I wish things had turned out differently and our friendship could have grown into something even more special than it already is. It wasn't meant to be, and I will keep the flame of friendship burning bright from the other side of the World. There will always be a special place in my heart for the best friend who kept me going in the worst of times; of course I will always have regrets, but I also have to look forwards to the future.

We left Portsmouth on a rainy Saturday morning, after a series of emotional farewells. On that final day, Zerina turned up on the door step, just so she could wave us off. She did what others didn't, people who should have been there, and for that she will, like Jules, remain a friend for life. She also continues to phone, message and video call; as Darrell said to me, just the other day, she would have been his reason to stay. Zerina, along with Jules and my dear friend John, were the family we should have had, the people who truly loved us, and we loved back. You certainly can't choose your family, but you can evidently give it a damn good try!

Sitting at the airport, waiting for our first flight to Croatia, I was able to reflect on my time in the UK. I had, and still have, a feeling I won't be back any time soon, definitely not to live again, and it was time to let go of the past. At great milestones in my life, I have always thought about the 'what if's' and 'buts.' Our almost knee-jerk reaction to up and leave, had brought home the nature of what we were doing, we were leaving Britain for good, saying farewell to friends for the last time, but happy to leave the crap behind. In a few hours we would be with loving family in Croatia, with people who we cared for deeply, far away from the pain we were leaving behind.

Our trip to Australia was always about saying au revoir. With the UK becoming a distant memory, it was now time to connect with our Croatian Cousins before continuing on to Thailand. Marin and Vlatka had been in our lives since 2008, when Darrell went to Croatia to see family for the first time. We continued to go there year after year, and had many special memories to take with us on our journey home to Oz.

It had been a few years since we last saw them, and we hugged just like it was yesterday. Spending ten days with them at their home in Makarska was a joy and made us realise what family was all about. We had had such a torrid time before we left, we forgot that there were people who actually loved us and within a few short hours of arriving, we were comfortably at home, looked after by people who only had our best interests at heart.

Spending two weeks in Croatia was just what we both needed. We spent time visiting the Dalmatian Coast, relaxing in one of the many cafés and bars along the Makarska Riviera, gazing at the icy blue sea and just enjoying the peace and quiet. Vlatka and Marin prepared home cooked meals, and we sat talking to the early hours, catching up on family life in this beautiful Dalmatian town. I always feel like I am home when I am in Croatia, and this trip was no exception. This is a family like no other and the love they show is certainly unparalleled in my life; leaving is always the hardest part

Sitting outside a bar in Makarska, drinking a pint of Karlovacko, I heard murmurs from the tourists walking along the promenade. It had become apparent that HM Queen Elizabeth had died back home in Scotland. This amazing lady, the best public servant the UK has ever known, had quietly passed away, leaving a great gaping hole in all our lives.

My respect for the Queen goes back to my childhood, she is the only Monarch I have ever known. I became emotional, as I would if it had been a member of my own family. The Queen was the constant in my life, and she was now no longer there; words can not describe how upset I was.

I suppose in a way, it was quite poignant that she passed away as we were leaving the UK for a new life down under. An era was well and truly coming to an end, and her passing just reinforced the decision I made to leave. I was at least able to toast her passing, and made a promise to myself to watch the funeral from Thailand on the next leg of my journey.

Leaving Croatia was a wrench, as it always has been, but the time we spent with family was invaluable. We promised not to leave it so long in future and both of us know our family ties are always a reason to return to Europe, as we will do as soon as we are able.

Flying back into London to catch our flight to Bangkok was a rather surreal experience. The death of The Queen was palpable. Walking through the terminal after our arrival, there were TV screens and poster boards everywhere highlighting Her Majesties 70 years on the throne. I had returned to a country in mourning and a very different Kingdom. There was a quiet calmness about the place, as people reflected on just what Elizabeth II meant to them, deep in thought, glazed expression and respectful repose.

I would have loved to have laid flowers in her honour, but with our connecting flight less than 24 hours away, I was lucky enough to have a friend do it for me. Little John was heading to London that day, I was supposed to meet him, but with delays, it had become impossible, and he put a bouquet down in green park from him and me; a gesture I will never forget. This is what friends are for, and that's what made leaving Britain so hard.

Our two weeks in Bangkok were amazing, more than what we both expected. This was a city we both fell madly in love with, and a place we want to return to as soon as we are able. Bangkok is where modernity meets traditional Asian culture, sitting side by side, down every street, around every corner. There was so much to do and see, that we couldn't have possibly fit in everything we wanted to do. From the BTS Sky Train, Statue of The Golden Buddha and the many Royal Palaces, we weren't disappointed!

We spent the first part of our trip in the notorious Patpong district of the city, and this colourful area really did live up to its reputation. Patpong was an eye-opener in every respect, and we enjoyed some rather fun fuelled nights in the bars and restaurants down Silom Soi 4, where all the gay venues were situated. This rather hedonistic introduction to Bangkok, left us aghast on more than one occasion, but I am certainly glad we ventured into the dark depths of the city, even for just a short while.

Here I was able to see The late Queen Elizabeth's funeral on my laptop. Sat in The Siam Heritage Hotel, surrounded by oriental splendour, I was able to pay my respects to Her late Majesty and remember with fondness, her legacy and significance for me. It did feel strange being away from the UK at this time, but then this was just the beginning of our new life and as I watched from afar, the penny finally dropped; in all probability we will never live in Britain again. Our life was firmly on track towards our new home in Australia.

From Patpong and the Siam Heritage, we travelled across the city to Samsen Road, one of the oldest parts of the city. Here we settled into our luxurious hotel, where we enjoyed a more relaxing time. Close to all the major historical sites, we spent our time exploring this stunning part of Bangkok, visiting everything we could.

Darrell and I had firmly removed Britain from our thoughts, preferring to concentrate on the future. Travelling has always helped us forget some of the more difficult periods of our life, and this European/Asian adventure was the tonic we both needed. After several months of hell, we were now able to sit back and enjoy our favourite part of the World, free from pressure and stress, doom and gloom.

Surrounded by the beauty Bangkok offers, we immersed ourselves in the culture of a country that was so far removed from our own, yet strangely felt familiar and homely. This was a place where we both felt at ease, reassured and untroubled.

Opposite The Nuovo City Hotel, where we stayed, sat a small family run restaurant, 'So Samsen.' This became our go-to place and every evening we would go there for dinner. The food was exquisite, cooked by hostess Aom and her colleagues. Aom's credentials were impeccable, having helped set up a Michelin Star restaurant here in Perth, Western Australia, and at a reasonable price, we were able to taste the best of Thai food at a fraction of the price.

The ambiance was perfect; after each meal we sat looking out across the street where we were based, just chatting about the future, stroking the resident cat and soaking in the atmosphere. The girls, at So Samsen, would often sit and speak with us, adding to the friendly 'family' vibe. Both Darrell and I needed 'So Samsen' at that point in our journey, it reminded us, that there were good people out there, and a whole World to explore. I have never felt so secure somewhere in my life, and I know we were both reluctant to leave this pretty little restaurant behind. Its significance will remain a part of us always, as we continue our travels across the World.

.... and so to Australia where we are today, preparing, hopefully, for the rest of our life together. This has unsurprisingly been the hardest part of our journey. When I left the UK five months ago, I never believed my life would be where it is today. Back then I thought I would get somewhere to live pretty quickly, settle down and continue doing the same job I did in the UK. However, nothing ever turns out the way you want it to. Australia has changed out of all proportion since I was last here in 1997 and the differences are clear to see.

Back in the late 90s, finding somewhere to live was easy, today nothing but. After the worldwide pandemic, property is few and far between, and we are still, after three months, living was Darrell's Mother. This has of course made life very difficult, and we are continuing to battle very much as we did in the UK. This is the worst part of life here in Perth; everything else, however, seems on the surface at least, to be going in our favour.

My application to remain in Australia is in and in a couple of days, on the 28th December, I will finally be 'legally illegal.' My 'Bridging Visa A' will be activated, and I can live and work here unhindered. So far so good, but one has to remember this is only a temporary visa, before my final Spouse or Permanent Resident Visa is issued at some point in the future. Nevertheless, all the fees and solicitor costs are now paid, and it is now a waiting game, to see if I am accepted or not.

I completed my medical assessment several weeks ago and this will either give me the green light to stay, or signal our departure towards pastures new yet again. The results I have received back so far are good, but the major one isn't back yet. As part of the process I had to undergo a chest X-ray and as an ex smoker for the last thirty years, I am hoping nothing too major is flagged up, but only time will tell if that is the case. Everything else is perfect and good to go, I just hope this final hurdle is crossed without too much difficulty.

I have also got a job, one of the first I applied for, and will be starting as a Senior Manager for a large corporation just ten minutes from where I live now. The pay is double what I was earning in Britain, and it looks like this could be the job that secures my future in Australia.

Also on a positive note, we should now be able to buy a property early in the new year. We have both built up substantial savings and with a dual income, we have been told we can borrow up to $500,000. This will allow us to finally have a place of our own, not waste money on rent, and finally, after 27 years together, settle into Australian life.

The decision to leave The UK was always about taking a chance at a new life and as reluctant as I have been in the past, I am glad I threw caution to the wind and grasped the opportunity with both hands. I suppose the last few months in Britain showed me I had nothing to stay for, except the few friends I had made, and of course my Father. These important people will always be in my life wherever I am, here in Australia or in the UK, they will always have a pivotal role to play.

At 51 years old, I am glad to have made a decision to restart and reboot my life and hope everything turns out for the best. Both of us are travellers at heart, so in the worst case scenario, we will just continue what we enjoy doing most and take off on another impromptu expedition, looking out for another place to settle. We only get one chance in this World, and as my Father said to me recently, before I left, I have to make the most of my time and go where my heart desires. Whether this is my final destination or not, is irrelevant, the fact is, we are doing what we love; the hope is of course that the outcome is favourable, and we can finally leave the past behind!

Back Home To A Country In Mourning!

15/9/2022

Yesterday, we bid an emotional farewell to Marin and Vlatka, as we made our way back to London. We had a wonderful stay in Croatia, but it was time to say goodbye and start on the next leg of our journey. I was up at an unearthly 2.30 am; Marin had to take us to Split Airport before he started work. Luckily, the roads were clear, and we arrived within an hour. I have to admit I felt rather emotional saying au revoir to Marin, especially not knowing when we will be returning again. Nevertheless, it was time to go and begin this new chapter in our life. Travel keeps our blood pumping strong and no matter how much I hate flying, I understand it is a necessary evil to live the life we lead.

The flight to London was a little more turbulent than usual and the plane felt quite unstable at times, although I'm sure it wasn't. With Darrell lost in music, a gentleman over the other side of the isle, looking as terrified as me, kept my spirits up. Our grimacing faces turned to laughter on occasion, as the plane rocked up and down, side to side. As the turbulence subsided and the seatbelt sign was turned off, we just looked at each other, patting one another on the back; we were happy to be alive!

Arriving in Britain felt strange, this was a country in mourning, and it could be seen wherever you looked. I was supposed to meet my dear friend John and travel to central London to lay flowers for the late Queen, but circumstances conspired to put a halt to that. Darrell was delayed through customs, as he always is. His Australian passport has always been a source of angst, especially with such a lot of movement in and out of the UK. He was asked to produce his Identification card, to clear up confusion with his rights to remain here, which cleared up any ambiguity, and he was allowed to pass through the boarder finally, later than we planned.

After frantic communication with John, we both decided he should lay flowers from both of us, since I had no time to get to Westminster. He has bought some beautiful flowers for The Queen, and I was delighted when he sent me the photo's. John and I have always been Royalists and have had many heartfelt conversations about them over the years. I am disappointed I can't see him before I leave, but I know it won't be too long before I see him again.

It took an hour to travel from Gatwick Airport to our hotel in Heathrow, and I have never been so happy to finally put my feet up. At 51, all this travelling is so much harder than it was when I was in my twenties, so the odd comfy hotel along the way is an absolute must. My years of backpacking are well and truly over.

You can never go wrong with Premier Inn and we both had a decent evening meal, even if it did take an hour to get to the table, and a lovely breakfast this morning. The best reason to stay at a Premier Inn, mind you, is because of the decent night's sleep you get. I slept like a baby, and God knows I needed it.

Later today, we fly to Bangkok in Thailand on an eleven-hour flight. This is not my most favourite part of the journey and after yesterday's turbulent flight from Split, I am more nervous than ever. Once the flying is out of the way, I am looking forward to an eventful adventure is this beautiful Asian country, that I have never visited before. Until our arrival, I will be signing off for now, but hope to blog as often as I can when I arrive. Goodbye Britain, it's been brief, but very emotional!