Blog Archives

Seasons End!

31/10/2017

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It was a few drinks after work on Monday; I actually haven't had a pint or two in quite a while. Last night it was a few Bloody Mary's for me, my drink of choice as they say. It was nice to get out of my routine, even for just a few hours after work. It has been a long, busy summer season in Spain, which for many bars and restaurants ends today, the last day of October. As the winter begins to take hold and the long trousers are brought out, it's time to sit back and relax just a little, as we wait for the madness to start once again, at Easter next year!

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1977 - A Tale Of Firsts and Lasts!

29/10/2017

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'It was a dream about star wars, last night, that made me recall events 40 years ago!'

It was 1977, the first Star Wars film had just hit the cinema and I like many others, spent hours queuing to watch this epic journey through space and time. I have always had a fascination with the universe and astronomy; I suppose I am a bit of a geek where this subject is concerned. I love Start Trek, read Asimov and research Quantum Physics in my spare time; so it was only natural I would love Star Wars; it’s where my passion for space travel came from.

I was six years old, Star Wars was one of the first ‘big boy’ films I had ever gone to see. I had watched the usual Disney movies, like ‘Bedknobs and Broomsticks,’ with Mother and Father on a Saturday afternoon, but never a big blockbuster, with my mate from School. At six years old, I didn’t know what to expect, but from what I recall enjoyed every minute of this ‘big’ adventure at such a young age. It’s funny, when I was thinking back to this time in my life, I could only recall certain parts, rarely fine detail. I remember my friend Jason with me on that evening, but no one else. At our age, we must have had an adult with us, but it just isn’t registering who. This was a day for school friends, adults faded into the background!

From that day after, I went Star Wars mad. I collected all the Star Wars figures and was bought the more expensive merchandise on Birthdays and Christmas. This was the one movie that defined me as a person in more ways than one. I can remember a dream I had, one that recurred night after night for many years; me flying through space, looking down on the Earth; I wanted to be up there, I wanted to be a spaceman. I believe my bedroom was decorated in Star Wars Wallpaper, although that memory is slightly obscured, I just can’t remember the finer details, after all, a lot happened between then and now. 1977 was a special year for many reasons, the silver Jubilee, my last year of infants school, new friends and experiences and of course the wonder of Star Wars. These were happy times, in the main; I say mainly, because, this was also the year I got in trouble, for the first and last time and all because of that film, Start Wars!

Like most of my school at the time, I was obsessed by Star Wars; Panini had issued those Star Wars collector cars; you remember, the ones you could buy in the newsagents, which contained about five cards and a stick of bright pink bubble gum. I like most of my peers bought them whenever I had pocket money; I nearly had the whole collection, but not quite.

I was in Mrs Brooks class, room 9 I believe, at Fareham Park Infants School; when we came in each morning, we put all our personal belongings in a draw at the back of the room; each draw had our name on and at no time were any of the draws locked. In the 1970s children carried very little of value on them; no mobile phones or tablets, just a pencil case, lunch and maybe a few pence to buy a drink at break time. The only things of value, that I brought into school in my satchel, were my Star Wars cards; to be honest, many of us did at the time, so imagine my delight, when I discovered another friend at school, had some of the cards I didn’t.

I don’t really know if I understood what stealing was, but in any eventuality, I ended up procuring this persons cards. Now I am not going to mention names, because the individual concerned is listed on my facebook friends list. All I can say is, we weren’t best buddies and I was jealous he had more cards than I. At lunch time, I took his collection, without a second thought.

The rest of this sorry episode is a bit hazy, so I will tell you what I can. We were all searched after the cards went missing, and I was found with them, probably in denial, certainly incapable of understanding the implications, of what I had done. What I remember next, is being taken to the Headmistresses office, standing in front of her, crying and upset. I was smacked across the legs quite a few times and left to stand outside her office for the rest of the day, this was the standard way of dealing with inappropriate behaviour at the time. It was also standard practice to phone ones parents in these circumstances, who also punished me in a suitable manner. It was such a traumatic experience, I can’t actually recall what the punishment was.

This was the only time I stole in my life. I remembered this period so vividly, with such shame, that I never again took anything from anyone, that didn’t belong to me. How should one punish a child for wrongdoing? There is the right way and a wrong way and the methods used in the 1970s were incorrect. I am in two minds about the punishment I received for stealing. I was chastised in such a way, that it lingered in my consciousness for life and stopped me from defalcating again. A slap or two across the legs and the humiliation of standing outside the Headmistresses office was just what I needed to stop me from pilfering; it worked!

Today in the year 2017, we are very politically correct where punishing a child is concerned and I can understand why. I had no lasting problems with regards to my treatment, but the same can not be said for all children, who were disciplined in this way. I know of others, who had life long psychological issues, because of the way they were treated by parents as well as those in authority. There are far more effective ways to stop a child from sealing, that doesn’t involve violence. One has to remember that a threatening act towards a youngster at such an impressionable age, can quite quickly escalate, as they mimic what has been done to them. I do however believe there are circumstances, when a short tap across the back of the legs should be used. A child running out in front of traffic, pulled back by their parents, may well learn from a friendly clip. These issues are not for me to judge; I have no children of my own and can only speak using my own childhood experiences.

1977 remains a year of firsts and lasts; writing about this small part of my childhood, has brought some fantastic memories flooding back, reinforcing my view, that stealing is wrong but also making me reflect on times gone by; comparing a very different World with today. Early childhood reminiscences make us who we are, making and learning from mistakes is the only way we can move forwards. That day in 1977 taught me much about life and morality, without its significance my journey could have been very different!

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Mollie and Wildling!

29/10/2017

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It has been two weeks since Lily was put to sleep so I thought it appropriate to update progress on Mollie and Wildling. Both the kittens have grown rapidly, far quicker than I thought. Wildling is especially large, eating us out of house and home. Considering his size when he arrived, he has come on in leaps and bounds. Mollie has a character I have never seen in a kitten before. She is extremely vocal, affectionate and very strong; she is most definitely in charge!

Both Mollie and Wildling have picked up many traits from Lily, during the six weeks they spent with her before her death; every day I notice more and more of the old gal in them, which is heartening to see. Our decision to introduce these two kittens before Lily died, was the right one. She perked up in the weeks before she passed away and gave a new generation the benefit of her wisdom.

Cats it seems will always be in our life; I have always believed a house is not a home without pets and our two new additions, temporary or not have been a great source of comfort, during these last few weeks.

Both Precious and Lily were indoor cats, mainly due to their nature and Lily's inability to find her way home. She literally had no sense of direction and it was safer to keep her inside, which she didn't seem to mind too much. Mollie and Wildling will be outdoor cats. They are a lot more boisterous and need to be outside. Luckily the new house in Puerto Marino, has a large nature reserve right on its doorstep!

For now our little family is complete, life seems to be heading in the right direction and it is time to put down some roots as they say. Mollie and Wildling have grounded us, at least for now!

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Halal Hell!

27/10/2017

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When I returned from work last night, I heard some good news from Britain for a change. Lancashire County Council had voted to ban the use of Halal meat in its schools. Around twenty seven faculties will be affected, encompassing twelve thousand pupils. The ban was championed by Conservative leader Geoff Driver, who like me believes the practice of killing an animal, without first being stunned as 'abhorrent and cruel.' Local Councillors voted 41 to 24 to ban the meat from all its council run schools.

Religious leaders, representing those affected by the ban, were quick to cry foul play, claiming children in greatest need, would be the ones who suffer disproportionately, creating huge difficulties for families, who would stop their children from eating a hot meal at school. Mr Driver made it clear, this was a matter of principle; protecting animals being his main concern.

It is interesting to note that UK law requires farm animals to be stunned before slaughter, but interestingly makes an exemption on religious grounds. I find this a terrible indictment of Britain's attitude towards extreme religious practices, Animal welfare must come first, not the views of religious fanatics,

I have always found the production of Halal meat an abomination. I am first and foremost an animal lover and am shocked that Britain would allow such slaughter to take place. The pain the animals go through is unthinkable. What civilized country would condone such butchery, towards another living creature?

Other countries such as Denmark and New Zealand stipulate, all animals must be stunned before they are killed, even for Halal meat. These are large meat producing nations; why can't Britain do the same? In my opinion we pander too much towards the needs of religions, whose teachings are based on manuscrips thousands of years old. We need to ban Halal entirely and stop allowing faith, in whatever form the right to hijack our everyday lives.

Well done Lancashire for doing the decent thing; lets hope other councils and organisations follow and put pay to this repugnant convention. The United Kingdom needs to stand up more, for the values it holds dear, this includes ethical treatment of livestock, which is being undermined by the Halal industry. I have personally signed many petitions and written to Members of Parliament in my time, expressing my views; did I get a reply? Of course I didn't! I am not part of a large religious lobby group, so my views don't count; make sure yours do!

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Forever Enduring Cycles - CHANGE OF ADDRESS!

25/10/2017

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'Forever Enduring Cycles' my second blog, started in December 2015 has a new web address. Until recently you could access this site at www.foreverenduringcycles.com. I have decided to remove the dot com status. Forever Enduring Cycles will remain published as a site, under the URL http://foreverenduringcycles.weebly.com/ It has been necessary to make this name change, in order for me to concentrate writing my newest blog, Spanish Views. Initially I considered removing Forever Enduring Cycles altogether, but due to its continued popularity, decided to keep it operational!

If you have bookmarked Forever Enduring Cycles, you will need to change the URL by clicking on any of the links above, which will take you to the new web address, saving it as your new bookmark.

I will continue to update Forever Enduring Cycles as and when necessary and hope you continue to enjoy reading my words from a very different time in my life. Forever Enduring Cycles was written at a time of illness and relapse; the writing is very different to that of today, grammatically poor at times; raw language, written from the heart at a cross roads in my life.

Please continue to read Forever Enduring Cycles and my first blog Bipolarcoaster documenting a traumatic period in my life and of course my latest blog Spanish Views, following my new life in Spain.

Thank you for your continued support!

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Reflective!

25/10/2017

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It's been another morning of packing for me. I have nearly finished boxing up my books for the move to our new house at the end of November. At times of change, I always begin to reflect, especially when moving house. Of course the last time myself and Darrell relocated, was in January 2017, leaving the UK for Spain. That was a very different time; tension was running high, stress was in abundance and our future unknown. Today we are moving in a far more positive light, looking forward to the challenges ahead and opportunities yet to come.

Reflecting is an important part of healing; my time spent living in this house has been eventful, full of ups and downs. I have not enjoyed living here as much as I thought I would however. These four walls were never right for us in the first place. When we chose it online, we had to take pot luck in reality. Now we are more seasoned residents in Gran Alacant, we are well aware of where we should be living and the type of accommodation that suits our needs.

By the time we leave, I would have been living in this town house on the edge of a windy ravine for twenty two months. In the winter, it is cold and uninviting, unheated, damp and wet. It was never the best choice for all round occupation. As a holiday rental it would have been perfect.

Sadly I have lived in Spain far longer than Darrell; he spent seven months in Australia caring for his Mother, who was diagnosed with cancer and a brief period in the UK working, whist Darrell's status in Spain was finalised, collecting paperwork and completing the application process. Previously we had never been parted for any length of time, so this was a huge wrench for us. Today, we are finally together, legally and officially, both working and without the need to be separated, at least in the short term. Neither of us know what will happen in the future. Darrell will have to return to Australia to see his Mother at some point, as I will have to travel to Britain to see my family.

Both Precious and Lily, our much loved cats, who traveled with us to Spain, died in this house. This remains a great source of angst for us both, there are so reminders of them within these walls and a fresh start is needed to move forwards, without them. Sorting through old memories, from the UK and Spain is actually quite a therapeutic exercise, especially where our cats are concerned. Pet passports, toys, collars and locks of fur all put away in a memory box. For me it is important to have these keepsakes; I have always been afraid of forgetting, various aspects of my life, which is one of the reasons I blog in the first place. Documenting everything; leaving an important footprint behind, gives me great pleasure. Telling a story, one that could help others in their endeavours, is a kind of a vocation for me now; I've signed up for the duration, until I run out of things to say.

So, back to packing boxes it is; with just over a month to go, I want to make sure I am fully prepared for this move, one of the first I am actually looking forward to. As a Taurean, my home, security and stability are important, which in recent years, I have had very little of. This time I am hoping to gain a few of the things I lost along the way; the years wasted living in the UK. Our current house, was never meant to be our long term, forever home, just a stop over, while we explored Gran Alacant. I will be glad to see the back of it, so we can finally start living again, without the impressions of the past!

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Time Heals!

24/10/2017

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Life's journey leaves casualties in its wake; we recover, our character defined. Without difficulties and setbacks, we wouldn't be who we are today, after all, life is about learning; remembering and growing.

Tomorrow becomes, just a little bit easier as scars fade; distant memories, forgotten dreams, ambiguous reminiscences recalled less. Time heals. time teaches, time becomes our saving grace!

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Why Pay For A Hair Cut?

24/10/2017

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Why pay for a hair cut, when your partner can do it. I have rarely, if ever paid for a hairdresser in my life. As a child, living at home with my parents, Mother or Father would cut my hair, they were both trained hairdressers. The major downside to this arrangement, was my hair was always cut the way they wanted, right up until the age of about sixteen.

After sixteen, I did spend a brief period paying for my hair to be cut, only asking my parents, if I ran out of money, which was often at that age. My one fifty an hour wage, working for Woolworth's, didn't go far; at least then I had a little more say in how my hair was styled!

My partner, before Darrell was also a hairdresser and when our relationship ended, there was always a friend around, who could cut hair; living on a gay scene, with more than its fair share of hairdressers helped.

When Darrell and I got together in 1995 and we ran off to Australia, with no clothes or money, Darrell ended up cutting my hair and vice versa. In fact the first time I trimmed it, whilst living in Perth, I used horse clippers; borrowed from someone we were staying with; job done, so what did I care.

Darrell continues to cut my hair today, after we moved to Spain. Had I been living in the UK, my gay daughter Lee, would do the honours. When she finally comes out for a break, she can give my thinning hair a good seeing too; until then, whatever is cheapest and more convenient is best. I certainly haven't got money to waste; staying frugal matters!

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Bipolarcoaster - CHANGE OF ADDRESS!

23/10/2017

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'Bipolarcoaster' my first blog, started in April 2015 has a change of web address. Until recently you could access this site at www.bipolarcoaster.com or www.bipolarcoaster.org. I have decided to remove the dot com and dot org status. Bipolarcoaster will remain published as a site, under the URL http://darrenvranjes.weebly.com/ It has been necessary to make this name change, in order for me to concentrate writing my newest blog, Spanish Views. Initially I considered removing Bipolarcoaster altogether, but due to its continued popularity, decided to keep it operational!

If you have bookmarked Bipolarcoaster, you will need to change the URL by clicking on any of the links above, which will take you to the new web address, saving it as your new bookmark.

I will continue to update Bipolarcoaster as and when necessary and hope you continue to enjoy reading my words from a very different time in my life. Bipolarcoaster was written at a time of illness and relapse; the writing is very different to that of today, grammatically poor at times; raw language, written from the heart at a cross roads in my life.

Please continue to read Bipolarcoaster, my second blog Forever Enduring Cycles, documenting recovery from illness and my latest blog Spanish Views, following my new life in Spain.

Thank you for your continued support!

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A Very Sordid Wedding!

22/10/2017

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Just a short blog today; I am watching 'A Very Sordid Wedding!' 'Sordid Lives,' the original television series and the movie of the same name, released in 2000, got me through some dark times in my life. Sordid Lives follow a deep south American family, as they come to terms with death and homosexuality in their midst. A Very Sordid Wedding, the second movie, introduces gay Marriage, to the local Baptist community, at a time when 'anti equality' rears its ugly head.

If you get the chance try and watch both of these fabulously funny cinematic marvels, from the genius of Del Shores. It was touch and go, whether A Very Sordid Wedding would even make it to the big screen, so I was truly happy to see it advertised in my inbox today.

Right I'm off, got a movie to watch. Have a great day Y'all!