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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe, and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions must be made. Illness, family bonds, and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in the life of a 'Roaming Brit!'

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Rab's World!

30/11/2017

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​"sometimes when we give up on someone, it's not because we don't care anymore, it's because you finally realise they don't!"
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People!

30/11/2017

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I'm a watcher, observer and a lover of people; everyone I meet, no matter who they are. I have met many weird and wonderful characters in my lifetime, most of who remain distant memories of the past, not always good ones. I have lost contact with many I regarded as close; through mutual agreement, moving away, circumstances and in some rare cases because of difficulties and troubled times. Despite my inner circle of friends gradually getting smaller, I am still a people person, who enjoys the company of others and have many regrets over the loss of friends, who meant something to me then and still do now. If I had my time again, I would however, have done things a little  differently. I am an extremely difficult person to get close to, but that wasn't always the case.

​My past is littered with debris and collateral damage, from those who used to be a part of my life. I was probably the most welcoming person I knew, always taking people at face value, believing what they said to me to be true. I never once questioned my judgement, after all, I was always honest, surely others were too? Well as I know now, most people are not sincere, far from it; they are out for what they can get, from unsuspecting people like me, victims of their next scam, lie or opportunity. Things weren't always this way, time has taught me a great deal, but way back in the past, my relationships with others were very different.

I left school in 1987; attending college in the small  town of Fareham, Hampshire. This was my chance to meet others and make my own evaluations, about who they were, gage an opinion and maybe, just maybe form a bond. I made many new friends during this period, several remain close today. In the main, I thoroughly enjoyed my first dip into adulthood and the relationships I formed. There were no warning signs, of troubles to come. I was the odd one out, in many respects, often seen sitting in lectures, wearing a bow tie, or completing my homework in the local pub, the Admiral Cunningham.' This eccentric behaviour never stopped me from forming associations with others, who accepted me for who I was, not who they wanted me to be.

When I left college and went to University, my friendships began to take a turn for the worst. The people I grew up and went to college with in Fareham, were of similar outlook and character. We were 'small town' and acted accordingly, knowing know better. Moving to a city opened up a whole new World, full of contrasting individuals, from different walks of life; a melting pot of views and contention. If I thought I knew people, I was sadly mistaken. I am only in contact with one good friend, from my University days; myself and Ramona were inseparable, always in each others company. I am thankful I gained a close 'mate' from that period, because University for me, was not a happy time. I met many difficult, unscrupulous people, who were out for what they could get, thinking nothing about others feelings and emotions to get where they wanted to be. This was my first brush, with the less savoury elements of society. Friendships conceived at University and continued afterwards, in the belief they were akin to family. Manipulators are great at telling you what you want to hear, to make you feel accepted and happy with your sense of self worth. I was very naive and foolish, living in a big city for the first time, ripe for taking advantage of.

This really became the story of my life. Manipulative people, taking advantage of my vulnerabilities, in order to gain control and the upper hand. People like me are victims because we attract bullies like bees to honey. I have had many close friends who are no longer apart of my life because I chose to walk away, discovering they were not who they claimed to be or unable to inflict their warped sense of reality on me any further. My desire for closeness, always created conflict. If I believed I wasn't getting a 100% return from those in my life, matched equally and entirely through my own words and actions, I would discard them. My views of loyalty. allegiance and commitment were not the same for other people. I could not accept that everyone was different; this shouldn't have made them any less worthy as friends. I had just been hurt too many times and learned to remove and replace, rather than understand and embrace.

Moving to Spain caused me to lose many people. During my last few days in Britain I pushed those close away, causing trouble, when there was none there, in order to break away. I was never any good at saying goodbye; my head was in such a bad place, it was easier to ignore the feelings of others and just turn the other cheek, which is essentially what I did, to my regret. I still have feelings for those back home, hear from many of them regularly and open my house in Spain for visits whenever I can but I do not have contact with my closest confidantes; I choose to block out the loss rather than confront the implications.  I find any sort of dispossession as a failure and prefer to ignore the consequences; it's easier to bail out!

I am living my life very differently in Spain, refusing to form lasting bonds with anyone. I have loads of friends and acquaintances, just no one close. Many of the problems that brought me to Spain in the first place, transpired because of my trusting nature, believing everyone was honest and interested for the right reasons. As I am well aware of now, nothing could be further from the truth. I remain guarded, slightly bitter maybe, aloof and in the main coldly emotionless to the needs of others. Don't get me wrong, I will still go out of my way to help someone, but will never be able to fulfill another's need for closeness, it is no longer within my psyche. I have been bitten far too many times, to welcome with open arms. Today it is myself and Darrell against the World, there is no longer any room for hangers on, users and abusers. I am well aware of the worst life can throw my way, have learned a great many lessons and will always respond accordingly; I have no desire to travel down the same paths I have trodden  before. Today my strength is in my experiences and they tell me when enough is enough!

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Rab's World!

29/11/2017

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​"There's something you should always remember: you are better than what you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think!"
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Getting There!

29/11/2017

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Having been at our new home for four days now, we are finally 'getting there,' having more or less finished unpacking the jumble of boxes we brought with us. The downstairs is looking just about finished, although we still have a lot of stuff to go through, in the spare room upstairs. With Darrell just starting his four days worth of night shifts, it looks like we wont be completely sorted for about another week. We should be able to finally relax in early December.

So far so good; we are both much happier here, compared to the house at the top of the hill. You can really feel the difference in temperature at night and we also have a lot more space to play with. Someone asked me the other day, what would be the one piece of advice, I would give to someone thinking about moving to this area. After living here for two years, the answer to that is clear:

'Do your homework; check the area you are moving to and make sure it suits your needs!'

Myself and Darrell should not have moved to the top of the hill, we should have chosen a property near the G A Centre, which would have been far more convenient for us. You may decide living in Calle Canarias is better for you, you just can't tell until you visit Gran Alacant itself. Booking on the internet was an issue. If you can't visit the area first hand, speak to someone who lives here, who can give impartial advice; just don't take pot luck, as we did!

Have a good day y'all!
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Congratulations to Prince Harry and Meghan!

28/11/2017

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Yesterday HRH Prince Henry of Wales and actress Meghan Markle announced their engagement, with a Wedding following in the spring of 2018. The ceremony will take place at St George's Chapel in Windsor, a more intimate venue, with a capacity of 800 rather than the traditional Westminster Abbey, which can hold 2000.

I would like to offer my congratulations to the happy couple, as you would expect; my Royalist credentials intact. I know very little about Ms Markle, having lived in Spain for nearly two years, not following British news and reading newspapers very occasionally. When it became clear, these two were going to get hitched, I did a little research myself. 

Meghan is indeed a breath of fresh air, her charitable and humanitarian work, at the forefront of her life. She is used to the media, working in the industry she represents and will be completely different to any other member of the Royal Family we have had in the past. Strikingly, Meghan is also from mixed race heritage, a first for a Royal bride; it shows how far we have moved on from the divisive discrimination of the past; I for one am delighted Meghan will become a member of the Royal Family. Listening to her and Harry on BBC Breakfast this morning, I was struck by the love they have for each other and how informed and eloquent Meghan was; a far cry from the Diana and Charles interview, just before their Wedding; If anyone can handle life in the spotlight, it's Megan. As preparations begin for the Marriage in May, I am sure she will have plenty of time to cement her position, as a member of the most famous family in the World and unlike other Royal brides, will have the full support of her future husband, Prince Harry!

Many congratulations to both Harry and Meghan, may you have many happy years together. The Monarchy stands taller today than it did yesterday!
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Rab's World!

28/11/2017

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​​​"I have come to the conclusion, that this Multi-tasking shit, is only a way to screw everything up simultaneously."
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Casa Ja Luka - Moving To Puerto Marino!

28/11/2017

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By Friday night, everything was nearly packed at Casa Gay Caprice; in truth what you see stacked in the photograph, is only about a quarter of what we have; this is what I call travelling light. Despite offloading the majority of my collectables in the UK, I still have a few cherished items left, a constant source of angst for Darrell, every time we move. Still I'm not getting rid of any of it anytime soon, so he'll have to get used to it!

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It was a jolly cold night at the old house, (even the kittens were under the duvet;) one of the many reasons we have moved. I will not miss it. The damp conditions that I had to live in while Darrell was in Australia were horrendous; I contemplated leaving Spain on a number of different occasions. Luckily we both stayed and can now move on to pastures new, away from Heart Attack Hill, down to the urbanization of Puerto Marino. The villa is bigger, warmer and most importantly south facing!

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We were helped out by a number of friends on the day, showing the real community spirit of Gran Alacant. Paul and Michele as well as the two Andies, Belgum and Stewardson were there early in the morning to give us both a hand moving furniture and boxes, stuff I had bought over from the United Kingdom, nearly two years ago. For the first time in my life, I haven't actually purchased any 'non essential items' or 'tat' as Darrell would put it, since moving to Gran Alacant; although when I look around my new home, surrounded by boxes, you would never actually believe it; I still have an awful lot of stuff!

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It's been two days since we moved in to our new home 'Casa Ja Luka,' and we both feel far more settled than we have for a while, despite the move. The new villa is so spacious, both inside and out; the kitchen is three times as big, it has a utility room, three bathrooms and two bedrooms, one en-suite. The views from the house, are not as spectacular as  our old home, but are none the less amazing, encompassing a nature reserve, directly in front of the property. This will be ideal, for the new cats, should they want to go outside in the future.....

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......Talking of Mollie and Wildling, well they have settled in well, enjoy Casa Ja Luka as much as us. There is a lot of space to explore here and they are spending their time investigating every inch of it. At the moment, their favourite place is the sun room, right at the front of the house. They both enjoy laying in the sun all day and seem a lot happier here, rather than the much colder Casa Gay Caprice.

So there we are, all moved in to our new home; it's the 28 November 2017 and I'm still unpacking, after a long few days of stress but can finally see through the boxes, that are gradually being cleared. Inevitably at this time, I am in reflective mood. A new start and move to pastures new, is something I am well used to, having moved thirty times in my life. Our first house in Spain was never meant to be our 'forever home,' it was a stop gap, while we discovered the area and decided where we would like to live. Nearly two years later, Gran Alacant remains our home, but we are away from the top of the urbanization, having moved  into a more practical option, close to all amenities; the G A Centre, supermarkets and bars, all within walking distance.

I am however grateful for moving to Calle Canarias in January 2016. I met some wonderful people, who have been instrumental in myself and Darrell adjusting to Expat life on the Costa Blanca. Without all of their support, we both would have probably left, returning to the UK, within a few short months. The Expat and Spanish community are a close knit bunch, especially in this relatively small urb near Alicante. Their victory as a team, is their ability to adapt and most importantly, help others, who may meed a lift up, after upping sticks and moving abroad.  Only yesterday, I received a message from someone I met on day one, moving to GA, June, asking me for any information on jobs that may be available at the Airport where Darrell works, for a 'newbie,' who had just moved to the local area. Gran Alacant is the success it is, because people care and go out of their way to assist others. This is a neighbourhood of like minded individuals, open and welcoming, who just want to see others do well and play their part!

This is a new step, on a continuing journey, one that has had its ups and downs, but one that I am traveling for the duration. Thank you to all those, who have been there, as we have navigated the pitfuls and successes of a new life on the continent; we look forward to productive times ahead!
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Rab's World!

27/11/2017

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​"Don't stress about your eyesight failing you, as you grow older, its natures way of protecting you from shock as you pass the mirror."
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For Sale - MOTHER GOOSE – Baby Equipment Hire Business!

27/11/2017

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For Sale - MOTHER GOOSE – Baby Equipment Hire Business

Loss of premises forces reluctant sale.

Currently based in Gran Alacant since 2002, it could be relocated anywhere within the Costa Blanca with an active family holiday maker customer base.  It has proven to a successful business, whether based in a shop or run from a property with storage space available.

We are fully stocked with a large range of good quality equipment, a lot of which is new or nearly new, much of which has been purchased this year, in readiness for another busy season in 2018.

To help the new owner we have a website: http://mothergoosehire.wix.com/mothergoose , a facebook page, business cards and an e-mail address and phone exclusively for Mother Goose business.

For more information, or to arrange a viewing, please e-mail [email protected]
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Click to take me to the Mother Goose Website
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Rab's World!

26/11/2017

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I am still in the process of moving at the moment, surrounded by boxes and 'tat' as Darrell puts it. I will update on progress very soon, but in the mean time, here's Rab's World!
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​"Never mess with a woman. they remember stuff that hasn't even HAPPENED yet!"
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my adopted home of Perth, Western Australia.

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    A place to call home
    Finally, a place we can call home.  A community of like minded individuals, who used to call Britain home.  Now Spain is our choice, an altogether gentler, happier, sunnier and safer experience!
            Luke Feb 16
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