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A Week of Contrasts!

14/3/2026

This week has been a busy one, certainly more than usual. My ongoing health issues have been centre stage as usual and have been getting me down. These aren't major illnesses or ailments, but rather annoying, bothersome discomfort that I could be doing without. I have never dealt with my health concerns very well, and until 2018, I never really gave my well-being a second thought. However, moving back to the UK from Spain 8 years ago made me reassess my life in a way I hadn't before.

Part of the problem, and the reason my health anxiety spiralled out of control, was the circumstances I was dealing with at the time. My Mother was extremely ill during the last year of her life, until she died in 2019. I also abruptly changed my outlook on life. I gave up smoking, stopped drinking to excess, and began to finally look after my body. Today I weigh 70 kg, back then I was over 110 kg. I became aware of my mortality, almost overnight, and feared that the lifestyle I was leading was storing up concerns for the future.

Then there was the pandemic. With Darrell in Australia, I had more time to myself, thinking about the future of a world ravaged by a disease that appeared, on the surface, at least, to be killing people without impunity. Of course, the reality was very different from what I was led to believe by frightening government campaigns and bulletins, designed to scare people like me into doing what I was told.

The pandemic was rather like the AIDS crisis of the 1980s and 90s. This was another time when frank and difficult public information films were produced to change people's habits. My anxiety was as high then as it was during COVID, and these disturbing advertisements often had the opposite effect.

I do actually consider myself lucky these days. A friend sent me a message a few days ago, stating how fortunate I am to be living in Australia, expressing his view that I was living in paradise. In many ways, he was right. I do live in a relative utopia, compared to the UK, especially at the moment. And despite my growing list of health issues, I am glad to be in a country with a world-class health system. Thankfully, I have the option to see a Doctor on the same day, or pay for a procedure I couldn't afford in Britain. Despite this, I do miss my home every day and the friends I left behind. This is the hardest aspect of moving abroad!

On a recent visit to see my GP, he asked about my network of friends. He understands Darrell, and I have only been in Perth for a few years, so he wanted to know if we had any meaningful connections in Australia. He is also British, and equally has only been here for a short period. I explained that we had a rather limited circle of friends, which, in his view, can also cause long-term health problems. Loneliness in Australia is a growing phenomenon, and with so many residents from different parts of the World, it is also becoming a major mental health issue, as all of us try to integrate into Australian life.

This week I attended my organisation's retail awards and conference in Scarborough. We were treated to a wonderful few days at the beach, enjoying great food, the odd alcoholic drink, and, more importantly, a chance to get together with colleagues, who we only see once or twice a year. This is particularly important for me, having been with the same corporation since arriving in Australia in 2022.

I am lucky enough to work with some remarkable people. My boss is particularly sympathetic to my health anxiety and often gives me valuable advice. Getting together as a group does wonders for my welfare, happiness, contentment, and satisfaction. This is one of those rare occasions when I can sit, chat, and talk with people I have known for nearly four years. Conversing with like-minded individuals is a way to forget your concerns and concentrate on a job that has given me great pleasure over the years. Working for a company that cares and supports staff makes me a lucky guy. As readers of my blog know, that wasn't always the case. For this reason alone, I do consider Australia a paradise, even if I don't always say it. Yes, it is terribly lonely at times, but in reality, I have everything I want here — more than I did anywhere else.

It is true to say that I have been dwelling on my health a little too much in recent times, but our conference in Scarborough allowed me to forget about it for a bit. I was able to celebrate the good work we all do as colleagues, every day, and accept two awards on behalf of my team at Midland. For the second half of the year, we managed to scoop honours for all of our hard work. As a Manager, I am lucky enough to have been given opportunities that I wouldn't have had otherwise. These accolades are, in part, a validation for all my hard work, but they are also a recognition that the chaotic times that instigated my love of blogging ten years ago are finally over.

In 2016, I made a promise to change my life, and in 2026, I've done just that!

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Health Update!

6/3/2026

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Things I miss about Europe!

1/3/2026

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The Importance of Friendships!

21/2/2026

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It's been fantastic to talk to friends from back home in The UK this week. My life is so busy currently, that I hardly get any time to myself, let alone the opportunity to phone people. Thankfully, I found a few hours out of my ever-growing schedule to sit down and spend quality time with Michelle and Paul from Liverpool and Kire from Portsmouth.

Many of you will remember Paul and Meesh from my time in Spain. These were my Spanish family who were there through the good and dark times, in equal measure. They were always a great source of support during my two years in Gran Alacant, and it has been 8 years since I have seen them both. I felt quite emotional talking to these gorgeous people, and it took me back to one of the happiest periods in my life.

This morning I was also able to spend half an hour with Kire, who I used to work with at Tesco in Portsmouth. This was a job I thoroughly enjoyed and formed many lasting friendships, during a crucial few years when Darrell and I were separated through the COVID pandemic raging across the world. Kire, was the first hug of the morning and the last hug of the day. I don't think she ever really understood my embracing nature, but she always gave me a massive cuddle back—even during the pandemic.

Kire and all those I worked with in Portsmouth have remained friends since I moved to Australia, and it's because of people like them that my adjustment to life down under has been as trouble free as possible. It is true to say, we don't have many friendships here, but friends from back home, more than make up for it.

In today's vlog, I discuss friendships and the important role they play in my life.

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A Tribute to Paul!

14/2/2026

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The death of someone close never gets any easier to bear, and God knows I've lost countless people in my life!

This week I heard of the death of Paul Bayley, a friend from Spain and a remarkable young man. Paul was there for me during the darkest of times, when I lived in Gran Alacant, as well as the happier and more humorous occasions, when the expat community celebrated milestones and events in their own inimitable unique way. Paul was an important part of the fabric of an urbanisation that I think about every day and a place I hope to return to one day.

In today's blog, I have recorded a tribute to Paul and the special place he holds in my heart. Paul was quite simply a wonderful, honest, empathetic man, who ways always there if you needed him!

RIP mate!

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Beyond The Hallway - Love Without Borders!

9/2/2026

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Weekly Catch Up!

2/2/2026

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Our first flat, Canning Highway in Fremantle

Our first time back in Fremantle in three years. It's been a particularly rough few months for me, so a few days off, enjoying the sun in my favourite part of Perth was welcome. I don't relax much these days, but it was nice to just have some time out with Darrell and a Dana. Fremantle was our first home in 1995 and it remains a special place for both of us!

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Out Of The Hallway!

26/1/2026

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Click on book above to take you to Amazon

My new book 'Out of the Hallway' is out now. Written under my real name, Darren Light, it documents my coming out story between 1987–1995. A big thank you to John Hibberd for writing the Foreword, and my ex-partner, Martyn, for his emotional, important contribution.

The book is also dedicated to the memory of all those close friends from the 1990s, who have since passed away: Matthew Corbett, Pete Crossman, Andy (Annie) Baxter, Paul (Mother) Judd, Paul Nightingale, Brian Read, Steve Rogers!

RIP my lovelies — My journey wouldn't have been the same without you!

‘Out of the Hallway’ is the second book in a series by author Darren Light. His first book ‘Echoes In The Hallway’ documented Darren’s childhood, growing up in the small market town of Fareham, on the south coast of England, during the 1970s and 80s. His latest memoir, is a story about ‘coming out’ gay, during the late 1980s/early 1990’s. In the middle of a period, steeped in mistrust and misunderstanding, by a public, not yet ready to embrace diversity, ‘Out Of The Hallway’ explores the difficulties Darren encountered. From the relationships that kept him grounded, events that shaped his early adult life, and a culture, often out of control, Darren takes readers on an emotional journey of change and acceptance!

The book delves into the ‘Club Kid’ culture of the 1990s, with a poignant, often savage honesty. The habitual, underground world of clubbing and after parties, is documented with sensitive, honest and candid humour. Suffering with anxiety, Darren found it hard to be recognised as the gay man he was born to be. He takes us on a journey of perplexing emotions and deep enigmatic recollections, of a time, often forgotten, dismissed as a period of excess and extravagance.

Under the surface, love, relationships, companionship and pain, continued in the same way it did in any other community. The nuanced intricacies of life on a scene out of control, offers an insight into the minds of all of those who grew up gay at a time of great political and social change. ‘Out of The Hallway’ describes a scene on the edge, always one step away from disaster!