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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'
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The Curious Clapped Out Car Con!

18/3/2023

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This week, we finally got the internet installed at the villa; yes, it really has taken this long. To be honest, I am still hot spotting off my phone, because the connection is bloody terrible. I had been warned just how bad NBN broadband is here in Australia, but I didn't actually know that for sure, until we had a live connection (When it works) - it's bad, very bad! It reminds me of the internet in the UK back in the mid-nineties, and it is unlikely to get any better. Australia is a large country, so connecting every corner of this continent is just not going to happen anytime soon. This is one of my pet hates as I settle in to my new life, and it is one of many that continue to niggle me as I get to know this country inside out!

On Wednesday, Darrell finally took possession of his car, after nearly a week of ongoing repairs, from the garage where he purchased it. I hadn't actually seen the vehicle up to this point, and I wasn't sure just how much $5300 would buy you in Western Australia, but I don't mind telling you, I was gobsmacked at the state of it. In Britain, this car would have been scrapped; it really just isn't fit for purpose.

The Honda Accord is about twenty years old; it is covered in dents, dings and scratches and looks extremely worn out. It has over 250,000 kilometres on the clock and the paint is peeling all over the car. This isn't unusual for Australia, since the sun is so intense and obliterates everything in its wake, but it was still a shock, seeing just what you can buy for the money.

Darrell had also asked for different things to be fixed by the car yard who sold him the vehicle, so when he took possession, he expected it to be drivable; nothing could be further from the truth.

The steering was defective, the central locking faulty, and you are unable to see out the front passenger window. As if that wasn't bad enough, the passenger door can not be opened at all, making the car unroadworthy and dangerous. According to Darrell, there are also many other faults; like me, he is as angry as hell that this piece of rubbish was being sold in the first place.

The car market in Australia, like the housing market, is in a mess, and all because of COVID. With fewer cars being imported over the last few years due to the pandemic, people bought second hand cars, pushing prices upwards. This has left a large amount of 'clapped out' vehicles at the bottom of the market available for sale, that would have otherwise been scrapped. Unscrupulous car salesmen are selling them at highly inflated prices to desperate people, who need a car, and just can't get one anywhere else; Darrell just happened to be one of those unsuspecting people, and he was taken for a complete fool.

Luckily he hasn't signed a contract, but we are both unsure of his rights, since there is very little protection in Western Australia for someone who has bought a 'wreck!' Currently, his bank is trying to retrieve the money and if that fails, he will lodge a complaint with the WA Consumer Complaints Department, who will investigate the matter further.

I have my doubts that anything will get done, and worst case scenario we could lose the money and car. There are so many things about this country that makes my blood boil, and the protection of consumer rights is one of them. Both Darrell and I can ill afford to lose that kind of money, especially after everything we have paid for recently, and I have said he will not be buying a second hand car again. If we do recover any of the cash, it will be used as a deposit on a new car. With car values increasing, I feel sure this is the only course of action we can take. Cars at the bottom of the market are just too risky.

This seems to be a common problem across the country at the moment. Complaints have gone up by 730% over five years in WA alone, and it is important, anyone considering buying a vehicle, thinks carefully before parting with their hard-earned money. Knee-jerk reactions from desperate people are likely to end in tears, as we know to our cost

Only time will tell whether we get our money back, and I am still flabbergasted that a so-called first world country treats its citizens this way. There needs to be more protection in place to help people who have lost thousands of pounds to underhand, crooked car salesmen; until then people need to vote with their feet, literally, and walk or get public transport. I don't have a problem with walking, and nor should anyone else.  It will take a long time to break the car culture in Australia, but if anything will, it's the state of the used car market. Mark my words, if we lose a single dollar over this, I will take them to court; I won't stop until we have every cent returned!
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Paying the Bills!

11/3/2023

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The party is well and truly over, as they say. This week the first mortgage payment went out, which certainly isn't a milestone to be celebrated, but it does mark the beginning of our new life down under. Unlike the last five years, we now have responsibilities again, and have to knuckle down and pay the bills. We have taken out a wealth package with The Commonwealth bank and offset all our savings, saving us a significant amount of money per year. We are also paying a much higher amount each month into our mortgage, but with our home loan, only accounting for 16 percent of our joint income, luckily we can afford to do it.

In order to pay off our loan quickly, we have had to take out a variable rate mortgage, which was initially a concern. Only this week, the Bank of Australia raised the base rate by another 0.25%, which will inevitably add more money to our outgoings each month. However, for us, it isn't a problem; we are both working in well paid jobs, so this will not cause us too many difficulties. Nevertheless, I am well aware, this isn't the same for everyone.

Yesterday I was watching The ABC News on television and there was a story about a 75-year-old woman, who is having to sell her home, because she can no longer afford to pay the mortgage. This poor woman was given a thirty year, $650,000 home loan, only a few months ago. Yes you heard that right, a thirty-year mortgage was given to a 75-year-old woman; this just would not occur in the UK and to be honest I was shocked that this had even happened.

It does seem, however, that this is common practice, and substantial sums are being leant to people who just can not afford to pay it back. Having only just moved to Australia, even I was taken aback at how quickly we bought a house, with the mortgage being approved within a matter of days. Thankfully, it worked well for us, and we were able to move home relatively quickly once we were working. I am however sceptical about a system that allows pensioners to get a 30-year loan, who will be 105, when it is finally paid off. As my Mother and Father always said, 'live within your means, and you'll be fine.' Well, I learnt the hard way, but today I buy only what I can afford and no more; it has worked out well for me.

The Commonwealth Bank Wealth Package, also allows me to put as much extra money into the mortgage as I like each month, with no penalties, and it also permits me to withdraw that extra money if I so choose, rather than get a personal loan. This is handy to know for the future; we may decide to upgrade the kitchen or buy a new car, and there will always be money there to pay for it. I have no idea if this kind of mortgage is available in the UK, but I personally think it is a fantastic deal and should encourage a culture of saving rather than spending!

Of course, owning a home is an expensive business, as most of you already know. When we arrived in Australia, we had absolutely nothing, so we have has to furnish a whole house, which isn't cheap. On top of that, we are also having to upgrade the electrics in each room before we refurbish. There are quite simply not enough plug sockets in the building, so we are paying to have more fitted each time we decorate. On Monday we have an electrician coming round to fit new plug points in the family room as well as change all the light switches, at the cost of $500, it isn't cheap, but it is necessary for peace of mind. The electrics haven't been changed since this house was built in 1995; with the amount of electrical equipment we have in 2023, it is absolutely mandatory to upgrade as and when we can,

Also on Monday, we finally have our NBN appointment with IPrimus. It has taken this long to actually start the process of installing broadband at the house; it is like living in Britain twenty years ago. Even then, we are not sure if they will be able to connect us on that day; it is all dependent on the infrastructure servicing the villa. I am flabbergasted that it is quicker to buy a house, than it is to have internet installed, but this is Australia and despite all its amazing qualities, it also has many faults. I just hope we will finally have some form of connection by the end of Monday afternoon.

Darrell has also bought a new car finally, after finding something suitable, and it has been a long time coming. Cars are particularly expensive over here at the moment, after the pandemic reduced the number of new vehicles coming into the country. He could have continued waiting and waiting before buying anything, but he needs one now, it is important he has one to get to and from work. We have done what we have to, taken money from our savings and bought a Honda Accord; not a new car, but a great first step, as we continue to establish our life in Australia.

With private health care, ambulance cover, life insurance and utilities, life isn't easily affordable in Australia. Like the UK, we are also suffering from a cost of living crisis and there is no end in sight to the mortgage interest rate rises, so even though we are comfortable for now, we are well aware of what could happen in the future. As we navigate our way through this difficult economic period, we are learning from the mistakes of the past and no longer spend like each day is our last; we save for a future and the life we believe we deserve. This is our time to succeed in the embattled world, but this is also a time to lose. Avoiding the stupidity of previous failures and channelling energy into rebuilding our life is our overriding goal; when I write about this period in the future, I want it to be full of colour, positivity and hope, not negativity, disillusionment and despair; only time will tell if we succeed or fail at the first hurdle.
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Revisiting The Past From Afar!

5/3/2023

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PictureMe and Lee circa 1976
I've been away from the UK for six months now, and I often think of home. Understandably, I am not missing that little island in the North Sea in the traditional sense; I literally can't stand what Britain has become, and that is a bit of a shock for me. I feel a little bit detached from the memories I made over the years, the people who were a part of my life and most importantly the childhood that made me the person I am today.

There are many aspects of my childhood I didn't like; coming of age in a small provincial market town on the south coast of England, was not a barrel of laughs, especially during the 1980s. However, the good outweighed the bad, and there is much more that resonates fondly with me, than not, even today in my fifties. Yes, I did have my problems, but in the main my recollections are of happy times, full of laughter, surrounded by friends and loved ones. Enjoying lazy, long summer days, we played outside until the sun went down, and the street lights came on.

I have written a lot about my childhood throughout this blog. 'Short Stories From My Youth,' documents my early years, as a small boy finding my way in the World. Living thousands of miles away in Australia, I often think of my roots, even though I would rather forget the more challenging aspects of an era that certainly wasn't easy.

Relocating to Australia in the past was difficult; during the 1990s there wasn't the access to internet as there is today and staying in contact with friends and family was hard. I became extremely lonely and withdrawn and returned to the UK relatively quickly, when in reality I should have stayed; how amazing my life would be today if I had remained in Perth back then. Today I am reliving that original journey, only this time with enthusiasm and determination. Most importantly, I am in constant contact with people back home, and that is keeping me here, sane and content.

As I child I lived in a social housing complex on the edge of the south coast town of Fareham, a short walk from my families village of Titchfield. I have mainly positive memories from my time living here and most importantly, I was never lonely. Nashe House, as it was called, was filled with young families and children of the same age. My next door neighbour, Lee, was my closest friend at the time, and we would often play together outside. Our front doors were always left open, we were in and out of each other's flat all day; the community of which we were all apart was welcoming, giving and always there to give support when needed. None of us were rich, this was the 1970s, after all. What little we had, we gave gladly, and there was a sense of belonging in a way that doesn't exist today.

My old next door neighbour Lee has been in constant contact since I moved to Australia, and for that I am truly grateful. He has messaged consistently, and we often talk about the lives we once shared, a lifetime ago. Lee is a link to the past that I wouldn't otherwise have, and he has helped me adjust to Australian life, just by knowing he is there, echoing the memories we made together as children. His friendship has been instrumental in keeping me grounded and focused, as I restart my life in Australia, and that is something I am truly grateful for.

Let me be honest, I haven't kept in contact with many people since leaving school; I had very few good friends at that time, and if anything I was glad to walk away through the school gate on that final day. It is only because of the advent of social media, that I have managed to interact with school friends and those I lived with in Nashe House. Had I been born even a few years before, I am not entirely sure if I would be in contact with anyone from that period today. For that reason, Facebook, Instagram and the like have helped me communicate with those I would have ordinarily lost contact with.

Lee's Mum still lives in the neighbourhood, and he visits her often. To be honest, I wish I had spent more time with my Mother before she died, but we can always look back with hindsight and think 'what if?' Last week, he visited his Mum as usual and sent me photographs of the community, I used to call home. Apart from a brief visit, I haven't been there in many years, and it brought back so many memories, seeing it, as it is today.
When I was a child, everything seemed so big. The block of flats where I lived appeared vast; I remember looking up to the balcony above our front door, head spinning, feeling dizzy, at the sheer height of the 70s brick structure above. Just outside our small front garden, the dedicated washing area, where residents hung their clothes to dry, was an arena to play and make memories. The rolling green fields of the school opposite flowed infinitely down to the old railway bridge, where I used to forage for blackberries with Mum and Dad as a child. The surrounding houses and shops, offered a chance to explore, finding new hiding places, adventures and journey's to fulfil.

This was a time of wonderment and finding my place in the World, but it was also a period to push boundaries and see just how far I could go. As children, we were always looking to towards each new day with enthusiasm and awe. Without a care in the World, life flowed like water off a ducks back.

Lee's photographs conjured up an explosion of nostalgia and remembrance. Reflections of an innocent time, free from stress and worry, came flooding back. Laid bare before me, were photographs of my juvenescence, forty-five years in the future. I vaguely remember different scenarios related to these modern day digital photographs, but I don't recognise the run down nature of a neighbourhood that used to be so well-kept and looked after.

Lee and I grew up at a time before technology, before mobile phones and computers; we used our imaginations, rather than websites and search engines and enjoyed an outdoor life, going from neighbour to neighbour. There was no fear or hate towards the residents in our locality, just respect, regard and recognition towards our extended family next door. This was the decade before the 'rot set in,' and all of us lived happily side by side. This is the part of Britain I miss every day, but wherever I live in the World, those sentimental, wistful anecdotes will always be a product of the past. I can recall these narratives in my home town or my adopted home of Perth, it just takes a friend like Lee to jog the old grey matter occasionally.

I am glad to have grown up when I did, at a less complicated, more simpler time. The people who remained in my life were the important ones. Happily, I am in contact with my old childhood friend Lee during a period of great upheaval, when I need his words more than at any other time. As I adjust to life down under, it is good to know my past still plays a part in my future direction; without retrospection and foresight, I would surely make the same mistakes again!
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Snake Season!

4/3/2023

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The snake season has arrived in Australia; not a particularly welcome part of the year, but an important date in the antipodean calendar I'm sure. Of course this isn't something I knew off the top of my head, or was made aware of when I moved here, this is an event that just happened to rear its ugly head and reinforce my dislike, of some of the more colourful wildlife here in Perth.

It was a typical afternoon at work, and I was due to take part in an online meeting with colleagues. It was a particularly humid day, clouds were gathering in the sky, and I was in the middle of eating my lunch. I had just taken the last bite of my cheese and Ozemite sandwich, when I heard voices coming from the back of the stockroom. A member of staff had come across a small baby snake. Without her glasses on, she went to pick up what she thought was a cord and was taken aback when it suddenly moved away from her; In her words, it was rather agile and active.

Having never dealt with such a situation before, I was initially unsure about what exactly to do. I began by evacuating the store room and moving staff to the front of the shop. After taking advice, we were told a snake catcher was on the way and to try and keep away from the back of the stockroom. Before we could do that, a member of staff quickly ran to the back and shut the roller door, just in case anyone ventured inside. On her return, she spotted the snake and instantly through a bin on top of it, trapping it inside.

It wasn't long before this rather rugged Aussie snake catcher arrived and went to detain the offending reptile. To be honest, not knowing much about snakes, I assumed it would be pretty harmless, especially being a baby - how wrong was I!

The snake was called a Dugite and is native to Western Australia. It has a greenish body and black head. These snakes are solitary and tend to live alone. This little babies Mother literally threw him or her out as soon as she was able, and boom, it was out on it own. I was expecting there to be more of them, maybe a nest or something, but no. The snake catcher explained that where there is a solitary snake, there will not be another. There may well be one next door, but certainly not in the same building. In a way that was reassuring, but as he stood there with the snake in a bag, I couldn't help thinking, 'when would our new resident move in.' Whether that is true or not, and as one snake leaves, another surely follows, I don't know.

Mr Snake Catcher continued in conversation, detailing the life of this little Dugite and confirming it was only passing through. This is snake season in Australia and endless eggs will be hatching, making them more visible than they otherwise would be. Generally they don't go inside people's homes, but having just hatched, unaware of their environment, it probably made a mistake, ending up in our back room.

.... Now for the chilling part. This seemingly harmless snake is highly venomous and yes, it can kill, even as a baby. That's when it actually hit me - I am in Australia, where the wildlife is so far removed from that in the UK, that I need to be on my guard at all times. These situations can happen from time to time, and I must make myself aware of what is dangerous and what is not. I could have quite easily tried to pick up this little critter and throw it outside, but thankfully I didn't, or this blog post may well have ended very differently.

Since the snake incident at work, I have to admit I have become a bit paranoid, checking for reptiles and spiders wherever I go. Every morning I check under the toilet seat, my shoes, in my knicker draw, and in the laundry room, just to make sure there is nothing lurking in the shadows. I have rarely seen anything nasty since moving here, and as a rule I don't go out of my way to find them.

It reminds me of the time I was living in Australia in 1997. We lived in a new build in the then up-and-coming suburb of Ellenbrook and were there for several months. Every day, numerous times a day, I would head to the kitchen sink, get a drink of water or do the washing up. All perfectly normal, so I thought. It wasn't until we left the house in Mid-Summer Circle, that Darrell told me the plants along the sink, on the window shelf above, were full of red back spiders. My mouth dropped, I couldn't believe he never said a word.

Looking back now, I am glad he didn't. If he had, I would have spent everyday looking for them, avoiding the sink and generally becoming a nervous wreck. If you can't see something, or are not aware it's there, you can generally function normally - give or take the odd mishap. Now, something's just can't be unseen, and although I am familiar with the venomous Dugite, I would have rather not experienced it in the first place.

I suppose my date with a snake, not unlike others I've had in the past, was a warning to be mindful of where I am. In time, I will forget it ever happened, but until then it is just part of the course, living down under. The further I integrate into Australian life, the more used to the extremes I will become. I look forward to the day when snakes and spiders will be like water off a ducks back; until then, I'll keep on learning, adapting and mastering, becoming part of the fabric of society and relishing the challenges that come my way!
This week we have managed to continue decorating the villa. With work commitments top of our agenda, we are having to fit home improvements in when we can. We have more or less finished the front lounge, with the new multicoloured rug, which matches Mollie's hair perfectly, and a few other finishing touches - a homage to the collector still in my heart. The family room now has a new sofa, and I am waiting for the new carpet to arrive tomorrow. This room will be a reflection of the 1960s and 70s, and I am going to try and make it as retro looking as I can, starting with a bright orange feature wall - who knows where it will end!
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Despite work taking priority, we did manage to spend a weekend together, which will be the last one for a while. This is a very busy time for me and Darrell, as we continue building our careers in Australia. Moving from the UK was about improving our life together, but it was also about the quality of life we have together. The dark, grey, rainy days in Portsmouth may well be a distant memory, but if we spend all our time working, we will never experience the lifestyle we both crave.

For now, we have renovations to complete, furniture to buy and decorating to do, so it's time to knuckle down and continue to rebuild our life in Perth. We have a hefty mortgage to pay, a cat to look after, a car to buy and bills up to our eyeballs, so that elusive lifestyle will have to wait, just a little bit longer.

As we move from summer into winter, our new villa will come into its own; a sanctuary from the elements outside and a bolthole from the disparaging World around us. We are both happy to be far, far away from Britain and the dark, grey, depressing existence we had before we left, but we are conscious of our roots, even if they are sometimes painful to recall. This is the life we have chosen together, because we no longer have the patience to bother with other people; people who essentially never cared about us. The best way to show the detractors you have moved on, is to build bigger, better and show you are far happier than them - that's exactly what we are doing today!
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The Week From Hell - What a mistake to make!

24/2/2023

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As weeks go, this one has been pretty rubbish if I am honest. Darrell and I often have periods like this; one minute things are going great and the next everything goes 'tits up.' As it happens, things started well on Monday; we went out looking for furniture for the house and just spent time shopping. I went for my usual mooch around the local charity shops and the day passed by relatively quickly. That was until I received an email from my solicitor, John, who had heard from the Department of Home Affairs, asking me to grant my caseworker permission to contact ACRO about my UK police record.

Way back in the dim and distant past, I made some stupid choices, nothing bad, just drunken shenanigans and high jinx, that ended with me getting a slap on the wrist. These weren't even classed as criminal convictions; I was told off by the police and that was the end of the matter. However, Australia's strict immigration policy says I have to declare any and all history, spent or unspent, however minor. To be honest, if I asked any of you, if you ever got in trouble with the police in the past, for something foolish, I'm sure most of you would say yes. Despite this, I confirmed all of my details when applying for the partner visa, and believed the matter was now closed.

In 2009, I trained to be an Advocate and Mentor with Action for Children. I went through a particularly harrowing enrolment programme and had to supply an 'Enhanced Disclosure,' just to show I was suitable to work in the position I had applied for. At the time I had just started a new job at Oxfam and sadly couldn't take up the appointment, but I received the certificate, saying I was approved to work, and put it in the back of a draw, forgetting about it until I arrived in Perth.

The truth is I never looked at it, because I didn't need to, I knew what the entries would include, so just left it to one side. This was never really a piece of paper I needed to use, until today, when applying for visas here in Australia. I referred briefly to the certificate, including the information in my application form as requested. When I arrived at Perth Airport in September 2022, I even showed Boarder Force the document, who duly took a photocopy for their records and let me go through unhindered.

The day after I received the letter from my solicitor, I phoned ACRO, interestingly located in my home town of Fareham, and spoke to a representative on the phone, who relayed the details on my police certificate verbally. This is apparently standard practice, and a written copy is only available under an 'Access of Information Order.' Everything she disclosed I knew about, except the final submission. My heart sank. Although this was no more serious than any of the other narratives I knew about, I had failed to disclose it to the authorities in Australia, and that could be a real problem going forward.

How the hell didn't I know about this entry? I immediately contacted my solicitor who told me to write a Statutory Declaration, informing immigration of my mistake and to declare the relevant information on my application for permanent residency. He also suggested reading the 'Enhanced Disclosure,' just to make sure there was nothing else on there; something I may have missed.

Now this is going to sound like I'm stupid, but one has to remember I have never looked at the disclosure properly, because I thought I knew what it contained. However, I found the document and started to examine it. For the first time, I turned the document over, and there at the top of the second page was the offending paragraph. I had literally never read any further than page one, and that was the problem. I have never felt such an idiot in all my life.

The records on my Police Clearance Certificate are not a reason to deny me settlement in Australia, by any means. Under normal circumstances, they wouldn't even be considered. What is more serious is the fact I didn't declare one of them in the first place. This was a genuine oversight that should never have happened, but it has, and I have held my hands up to it, hoping that The Department For Home Affairs sees the genuine nature of my error. I am so upset with myself, as everything was going so well, but this is one big spanner in the works and there isn't anything I can do to put it right.

For now, I am putting all of this to the back of my mind and, as my solicitor encouraged, getting on with the rest of my life. This may or may not be a problem going forward, but after the trauma and stress this has caused, I have to just park this for a while, until I am contacted about it officially. My fingers are crossed this will not hinder our future down under, but I'm not taking anything for granted and hope the powers that be, see through what was an essentially ridiculous oversight, as I rushed to complete my application.
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A house is not a home without a cat!

18/2/2023

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On Monday, we picked up the latest edition to our household, Pippa! Pippa is twelve months old and was being fostered by a lovely lady in Butler, about forty-five minutes away from where we are living in Midland. Darrell and I have always had cats, ever since we got together nearly twenty-eight years ago, so it was only fitting that we should include another one in our life together, here in Western Australia. Ideally, we would have brought our Spanish cats with us in 2018, but at a cost of $10,000 each, to transport them to the other side of the World, it would have been far too expensive for us at the time. After moving into Mathoura Street, it is time to once again have a cat we can spoil and look after; Neither Darrell nor I have children and Pippa will be our baby, as all our other cats were before her.

As I mentioned in my previous blog, Pippa has Hyperreflexia, a congenital birth defect. She was found dumped shortly after giving birth to a litter of kittens; from what I am told, it seems her condition may have been the reason for her abandonment. To be honest, most of the time you don't even notice she has a disability, and she has no problems coping with it herself. The only noticeable trait, is the significant dip between her shoulder blades and back, which make her look unique and slightly different from the norm. The reason we adopted Pippa, was because of her birth defect; it doesn't matter to us at all, what she looks like!

We arrived in Butler, to be greeted by Kerrie, foster Mother to many cats; she was a delight, spending time with us, talking about Pippa and introducing us to her other brood. Pippa was rather nervous and scared, and although she spent most of the time hiding, there were a brief few minutes, when she came and sat next to us on the sofa, as we continued to chat with Kerrie. She told us how affectionate Miss Pippi was, and the story of her rescue, several days after her newly born kittens were saved. It seems Pippa suffered trauma early on in her life, and it will be a challenge helping her adjust to a more normal existence. Having had rescue cats before, we are well aware of the difficulties ahead, but the rewards at the end are worth it. We hope to give Pippa the life she deserves.

Kerrie assumed Pippa would be living with her indefinitely, due to the nature of her disability; it seems people only want the perfect pet, but for us, it was about giving a good and loving home to a cat who needs it more than most. We are able to devote the time and effort to helping Pippa adapt to her new life, hopefully reducing the stress she obviously feels around other people. To see an animal so traumatised is heartbreaking, and we can only imagine the difficulties she went through before Kerrie took her in.

It seems the hyperreflexia Pippa suffers with causes no immediate pain, in fact she manages perfectly well with it, but in the future that may change. She may well suffer with arthritis as she gets older, like all of us, and may require extra care at that point. For now, she is able to enjoy a happy and healthy life, and we intend to spoil her rotten.

Currently, she still spends most of her time under the bed in the spare room. It is taking a while for her to get used to her surroundings. She is however getting far more daring and venturing out when she sees fit, just to let us know she is still there. In fact, she is probably the most affectionate cat I have ever known, and she loves being around me and Darrell. The empty villa we are living in, is a bit of a problem; the echo throughout can be rather disconcerting for Miss Pippi and once the house is suitably furnished and lived in, I am sure that will change.

Darrell and I have had a busy week and just haven't stopped working, so finding time to do anything else has been a bit difficult. We are progressing slowly at Mathoura Street nevertheless, and we now have most of the basics in place. Personally I am looking for retro, antique, bespoke pieces of furniture and art. I am not a 'live, love, laugh' kind of guy, and do not want to furnish my house with the usual Ikea cheap furniture - to Darrell's consternation.

With the front lounge more or less complete, we are turning our attention to other parts of the house. Today Darrell picked up a retro 1960s sideboard, which goes wonderfully in the family room, and tomorrow I am going to Guildford to buy a dressing table for the bedroom. Like the lounge, I want traditional furniture in the bedroom, not cheap flat pack alternatives. I suppose that's the British in me; I love homes with character and despite living in a 1990's build, I am determined to furnish it in individual style. The sideboard is certainly a statement piece and highly fashionable at the moment. Finding suitable 1960s accessories will be a bit of a challenge, but I have a good idea where to start.
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Our new house is certainly starting to feel like a home now, especially with Pippa firmly in our life. It will be a slow process getting everything just as we would like it, but Rome wasn't built in a day and I don't have an endless supply of money. This has been an extremely expensive time for us and our anxiety levels are riding high. One has to remember we were travelling across the World just a few short months ago, and now we are back on the property ladder, working every hour that God sends and settling down in a way we haven't since we lived in Spain seven years ago.

It does feel good to be focused again and working towards goals. Yes, we are spending money, but we are also making a home in Australia. I have lost count of the number of restarts we have had, and this is the final one on that list. Only time will tell whether we made the right move down under, or another blunder on a long list of failures. Until then, we will continue rebuilding our life in Darrell's native home, surrounded by family, navigating new unchartered waters, in a country as far removed from the UK as you could get; whatever happens, at least we have tried to live the dream!
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It feels so nice to actually have a home again - After years of travelling, we've finally come home!

11/2/2023

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It has been a long time since we last had our own home, so long, in fact, that I can't remember what it's like to live as a couple. Darrell and I are now settled in a new house, another country and a World away from our life in Portsmouth. Sitting here now, writing this blog, I am annoyed with myself for not doing this sooner. In reality, we could have both emigrated here years ago, but the time never felt right. Today, our current circumstances feel normal, natural and if I am honest, what we have both wanted to do for a long time. Until today, we never really had the courage to take that final leap, today we are glad we did.

Official settlement occurred on Friday, when the house officially became ours. The last eye watering sum of money left my account and both of us became homeowners once again. Despite spending thousands of pounds over the last few months, there was no regret or bitterness from me, just a desire to rebuild our life and work hard to pay the bills. This is 'normality,' what most people do, but it isn't something we have done before, certainly not in recent times, and it really does feel like my life has gone full circle. At 51 years old I may well be getting older, but this new adventure into suburban living in Australia, has given me a new sense of direction and the will power to succeed, where similar endeavours have failed in the past.

The villa, as they call it here, is big, bigger than anything I have lived in before. There are three double bedrooms, one with walk in wardrobe, a lounge, family room, kitchen, laundry room and small garden - just what we wanted. This house is my dream home, something I never believed I would live in, let alone own, and it finally gives Darrell and I the space we have craved, for so long. Unlike most people, we have not begged, borrowed and stole, we have both worked hard to get good, well paid jobs, and a beautiful house, unlike anything we could afford in the UK.

So far, Australia has opened doors and given both of us opportunities we wouldn't have otherwise had. Both of us are just waiting for the first thing to go wrong, yet everything seems to be going our way. I hate feeling positive, but I actually have nothing to feel negative about and that has to be the first time I have felt this way in many, many years, if at all. I like to think I am in the right place at the right time, but only time will tell if that is correct or not. Traditionally I have never got on in Australia, so this is a new experience for me; like Darrell, I am getting used to the success we are now both enjoying. As the saying goes, nothing lasts forever, so we will ride this wave of satisfaction for now.
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Last Sunday we began the process of moving into our new house, by once again going for Sunday lunch at the Stirling Arms. This would be our last meal there for a while; now we have a roof over our head, it isn't so important to get out. Nevertheless, we had a lot to discuss; although settlement occurred on Friday, we were actually given the keys on Monday, after the previous owner agreed we could move in early. This was a blessing is disguise - we both had the day off and literally threw everything into moving our belongings in. With both of us at work the next day, it was important to make the most of the time we had.

In the morning all the lounge furniture and new bed was delivered, later that morning, the white goods arrived and in the afternoon, the antique furniture I ordered from Guildford's Antiques were delivered. After all the cleaning, arranging of furniture, and shopping, we were both shattered by the end. In fact, I am still tired now, and we have a long way to go yet.

Like most moves, there are a few niggling issues that need to be sorted and on Wednesday we had the taps replaced in the laundry, and arranged for an electrician to come out this Monday and put in some extra sockets in the lounge. This is a house that was built in 1995, at a time when there was less technology in all our lives; consequently the electrics are not up to present day standards and will have to eventually be replaced completely. For now, installing extra plug points will suffice until we have the money to do everything we want.

Once the electrics are sorted we want to buy furniture for the family room, finish the bedrooms and finally get to grips with the garden, which needs a complete overhaul. All this will take time and a lot of money; with this in mind, we will have to take things slowly. As we are beginning to discover, it isn't cheap being a homeowner in 2023 and with all the utilities in place, we are looking at a substantial outlay each month. Like everything, it is all doable though, leaving us with plenty of money to spare for increasing the mortgage payments and saving money each month.

With settlement now complete, we are both officially homeowners again, able to live our life as we would wish. Living in a detached villa, we can make as much noise as we like; not that we are rowdy party goes any more, but it's just nice to be able to drill a hole in the wall, without repercussions from irate neighbours. This is what freedom is all about.
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On Monday, we will pick up a new addition to our household, a rescue cat called Pippa. Pippa is one year old and will finally make our lives complete. She is also different from the other cats we have had in the past; she has a congenital birth defect called hyperreflexia, which causes problems with her back. In essence, her shoulder blades sit higher than her spinal cord. This makes it impossible for her to jump like other felines, but to us, it makes her even more special.

Darrell and I have always had cats in our life and when I saw this beautiful girl, I just knew I had to have her as part of my family. She needed a home, and we could give her one. It was unlikely anyone else would give her the opportunity we have, but after losing both Lily and Precious in Spain, we decided we would like to adopt a cat with special needs.

Despite the difficulties she faces, it is clear from her foster carer, that she is perfect in every way - loving, affectionate and well-adjusted. Now we have Pippa, it looks like we have everything we have ever wanted and couldn't ask for more.

Australia is the final stop for us, on a life journey that has taken us to nearly every corner of the World. It is important for us to keep travelling, but now we will have a base to call home. Pippa will likely keep us grounded for the most part and with both our careers now taking off, it is time to do the right thing and settle in a place we have both grown to love, and a country that has always featured prominently wherever we are. This is home, this is the future, this is where our journey stops for now!
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Countdown to Moving Day!

4/2/2023

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We are literally counting down the days now until we move to the new house in Perth. All the paperwork has been finished, we have received the formal approval from the bank and the exchange of contracts will happen next week. It really has been a long road getting to this point.

Last Sunday, we took our friend Joy out for lunch at The Sterling Arms in Guildford, to thank her for all she has done for us since we have been here. From Christmas Dinner, to running us around in the car, she has been there supporting us through this difficult period. Without Joy's help, we would have found it very difficult to get things done in time for settlement of Monday, so it was only fitting that we showed our appreciation.

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With the sold sign now up, it has been time to shop, and boy have we shopped. We have turned up in Australia with absolutely nothing, so we literally have to buy everything. After another gorgeous Sunday lunch, we went on an impromptu shopping trip, to start the process of making our new house a home. This isn't a small place, mind you, so it will take time and a significant amount of money to do everything we need to do, but we have at least started.

With both of us working in well paid jobs, we are lucky to be able to have the money to buy the things we want, without credit; that will definitely be a first for me. I have made a pact with myself, never to use credit of any kind again; it may well make things harder, but we need to plough all our hard-earned cash into paying off the mortgage earlier. I hope to pay an extra $2000 a month on top of the $1400 we will be paying. That may sound a lot, but for the first time in our life we can actually afford it and have cash left over to save. I keep telling myself, 'why the hell didn't I do this earlier?'
On Monday we went to 'Jack's' in Belmont to buy some of the furniture - a sofa, TV unit, coffee table, bed and mattress. Rather than waiting 16 weeks, as we were told elsewhere, they informed us, they could deliver the next day if we so wished. From Jack's, we drove back to Midland and to 'The Good Guys' electrical store, where we bought a fridge freezer and washing machine. The Fridge was a little more than I wanted to pay and wasn't as big as I would have liked, but it is top of the range and made to work in these hot Australian temperatures, plus I absolutely love the stainless steel.

After much deliberation, we decided to buy a front loading washer, rather than the top loader we were going to get. I did some research and discovered top loaders weren't as good; in fact, they are positively awful in comparison. It has something to do with the motion of the drum. So even though it was a little more expensive, we went for the popular UK version, which will suit our needs perfectly.

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Today, after receiving my severance pay from Tesco, on the first day of my three-day weekend, I went into Guildford. I had seen some lovely pieces of furniture in the antique shop there, that I just couldn't resist. I am not a fan of flat pack stuff, so wanted to get something more durable, with character and a little bit of style, just to create a statement in the formal longe.

After a bit of haggling and polite negotiation, I managed to get a great deal on a beautiful oak bureau, with cabinet above, and an oak chest of draws. I don't intend to have everything antique by any means, but a couple of well-chosen items will go well in our new home, and it will give me somewhere to put my 'old tat' as Darrell calls it. Having said that, I have very few personal items left, since we relocated, so the cabinet should be the perfect size!  There are also plenty of other items in 'Jones of Guildford' that I would absolutely love, but with funds depleted, I decided to head into Perth for a spot of window shopping and lunch in Yagan Square.
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I haven't been into the city for a while, not since I started work anyway, so it was nice having a wonder round the shops, even though the weather was blisteringly hot. I stopped off at The Belgian Beer Café, for a couple of pints of Stella in my favourite  bar on Murray Street. Once again, there was just me and a couple of local alcoholics at eleven this morning, but I didn't mind that too much; takes me back to my time living in Portsmouth. To be honest I'll do anything for a pint of Stella, so since this is the only place I have seen it on tap in Perth, I'll have to put up with what ever is thrown my way.

After a shopping trip to London Court, I headed to The Shoe on Yagan Square for a spot of lunch and a pint of Peroni. The view from the Shoe is amazing and despite the heat, it was great sat on the balcony looking out over this beautiful city. I don't suppose I'll be making many more trips like this once we start paying the mortgage, so it was good to do it today, before the big move on Monday.

Today, Perth is really beginning to feel like home; that is something I never thought I would say. For the first time since Spain, I can really say, I am feeling happy and content, looking forward to a bright and successful future... With a bit of luck! At 51 years old, this hasn't been an easy move to make, and the last five months have been challenging, but with light now at the end of the tunnel, both Darrell and I can nearly breathe a sigh of relief. There is only one more obstacle to cross now, and this one could be the biggest hurdle of all!
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Tesco's End - Farewell to a faithful old friend!

29/1/2023

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This week, I have finally said a fond farewell to my job at Tesco. After nearly five years, I emailed my letter of resignation on Friday, ending what was probably the most productive period of my life in Britain. This was the hardest decision I had to make, but the reality is, my lifestyle break had come to an end, when I started a full time job here in Australia. The contract dictates the steps I had to take under such circumstances and with a little bit of prompting from my now ex-boss Sammy, I handed in my notice with immediate effect. Sammy was instrumental in ensuring I was able to take such an important career break in the first place; after some deeply painful days in Britain before we left, she was there offering support when I needed it most. Without her, our success now, may well have ended very differently and for that I will always be grateful!

The truth is, I hate goodbyes, and this was one I really didn't want to say. I understand I haven't been working in Fratton for five months now, but by holding on to the possibility, I may return to my job one day, I was somewhat comforted. You may well call it a safety net, or just not wanting to let go, but for me, it was about holding on to the good times and life enhancing memories that I made, everyday I went to work, behind the customer Service Desk. There were no bad shifts, although in reality there probably were, but nothing to speak of, and I always thoroughly enjoyed my time at Tesco; luckily for me, I will always look back at my time with fondness and there aren't many jobs you can say that about.

I don't think I have every really worked somewhere quite like it; the people were the most generous, giving and open bunch I have ever met and all of them felt like the family I needed at that time. Most people spoke of the friendly atmosphere and just how well colleagues got on with one another, but it wasn't until I left in September 2022, at the beginning of my journey to Australia, that I realised just how much I was going to miss the place.

I have to be honest now, and I know some of you won't appreciate it, but there isn't much I am going to miss about Fratton. I never enjoyed living there and would never want to live there again, but the friends I made, the generosity of spirit you see in the people from Tesco and indeed Fratton as a whole, is truly heart-warming. This was a community that treated everyone with respect and dignity, no matter what their background, and the enduring memories I made will stay with me for the rest of my life.

When I look back to my departure and those last few weeks at Tesco, I don't think I have ever felt more loved in my life. These were my family in all but name, they gave me everything I needed - from a shoulder to cry on, advice and direction, or a place to crash if the worst came to the worst. My colleagues, no, my FRIENDS, were there encouraging me, every step of the way, and I will miss them all, especially now everything is so final!

My time at Tesco coincided with some momentous events, not only in my life, but also in the history of the World. I started working there after returning from Spain, while Darrell was in Australia caring for his Mother. When I needed support, the team were there for me. It was never a chore going into work, in fact if you ask anyone who worked there, I was more often than not, early, so I could chat with friends. This was just what I needed, as I tried to build a life temporarily without my husband. This sense of belonging became even more crucial when the pandemic took hold in 2020; all of us bonded in a way that would have been unthinkable before.

Working through the worst public health crisis in a hundred years was often scary, especially during the early days, when none of us knew just how bad things would get. I remember working on the desk, which looked more like a bunker, with fruit and veg crates piled in front, as a barrier between customers and us. There was no PPE or sanitizer initially, and Tesco did everything they could to ensure our safety; these were times of great anxiety and stress, but they were also days of comradeship, laughter and music.

As shops closed, theatres were boarded up, pubs, music venues and places of entertainment shut their doors, Tesco remained open. Things were very different, of course, but we hosted events on those great occasions that would normally see people celebrating in the streets. From VE day to Christmas, we all did our best to make sure customers enjoyed their time; after all, we were the only stores open in this new dystopian World. Supermarkets were crucial as key workers like me made our way to work every day, through deserted, empty streets, to serve customers and hopefully brightening their day.

Today I am lucky to include many customers as friends, born out of the pandemic and the respect we showed for one another. From the Fox Lady, Joanne and her multicoloured hair, and the dear late Mrs Fisher, who I talked with throughout the pandemic, until her death just over a year ago. Together with colleagues, Managers and all those on Front End Support, I had the best four and a half years of my life.

I have shed a tear or two, as I moved across the World, which is only natural. Things will never really be the same again. I am, however, aware of where my future lies, but I am also mindful of where my journey began. The World was just a little bit sweeter at Tesco and I laughed just a little bit more; I hugged so much better (even throughout the pandemic, naughty I know) and I was just a little bit, yes just a little bit happier, in a job I loved more than any other that had gone before.

I leave behind people I love and always will, the memories of a special time in my life, friends like you wouldn't believe and of course my biggest, bestest, loveliest friend of all - Jules, my big Brother, forever, and someone I wish I'd got to know better. Nevertheless, we will always be there for each other, as much as we can, and when the time is right I'll be back in Fratton, sharing the love; picking up from where I left off, the day I closed my locker door, rekindling the nostalgia I will always feel!

Dedicated to Jules, my Brother from another Mother!

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The Dreaded Form 80!

26/1/2023

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January 2023 has been a month filled with paperwork. I don't think I have ever had so much form filling to do in all my life. Not that long ago, I used to think the bureaucracy in Spain was bad, when we moved there in 2018, but Australia beats it by a mile. I have always been mindful of just how difficult it is to move here, which is why I have constantly avoided making the decision to live in Perth full-time. After everything Darrell and I have been through over the years, it just wasn't something we really wanted to go through. However, circumstances change, and it has become a necessary evil; we have had to bite the bullet and do what is necessary.

From Medicare, the tax office, work related documents and now the dreaded 'form 80,' my life is just drowning in paperwork and there doesn't seem to be an end in sight quite yet. This week, my Immigration lawyer contacted me, saying I would need to fill in a form to assess my character. This isn't usual practice with a partner visa application, but because of several minor infringements when I was young, it is something I have to do.

To be honest, I never really imagined I would have to fill in such a form, since the convictions are twenty-five years old and committed as a rash, young twenty-year-old, after a rather intoxicating night out - that will teach me, never to act in such an impulsive manner again. A small altercation in 1997, is enough for the Department of Home Affairs in Australia, to delve deeper into my life. When I say deeper, I literally mean, as deep as it can get; it isn't, no laughing matter.

Providing job and address history since the year of my birth is no mean feat; I am lucky however to have documented my life over many years, and hold much of that information on my laptop. Going through all of that data has proved rather time-consuming, nevertheless. My computer filing system isn't the most logical, and the biggest challenge has been hunting down the important files. Thankfully, I have found the majority of what I need, and was able to submit the form to my lawyer yesterday.

I was always warned how difficult moving to Australia would be, so was aware such difficulties were bound to arise. Despite this, Darrell and I are very committed to this country and being close to his Mother at what is a crucial time. We are also lucky, to have the luxury, of time on our side. Both of us have been together for nearly twenty-seven years now, so proving our relationship together isn't difficult. The events and milestones that make up our time together, annoyingly, aren't always consistent in the same way, as a heterosexual couple, which can prove problematic. As gay men growing up in the eighties and nineties, our life was very much dictated by circumstances beyond our control. A lack of support, no access to help and advice, and the stigma of homosexuality imposed by successive Governments and less than desirable people, has always tried to thwart our relationship at every turn.

We are well-used to having to fight to stay together, forging a way through the red tape and despite the heartache and pain this causes, we have always managed to come back stronger than ever before. I understand how important it is for Australia to check our commitment together and my background as an individual. I personally have nothing to hide and have always been open and transparent with the authorities here. It is always best to be honest, tell the truth and admit your failings in life. A momentary indiscretion twenty-five years ago, may not be a reason to bar me from settling with my husband down under, but lying about it, certainly is.

This week, will end in the same way it began. With our completion date only days away now, it is important to focus on the end goals and not dwell on things I have no control over. I hope things turn out for the best, but I am always a realist at heart; if the worst comes to the worst, we will head back to the UK and restart where we left off. For now, that is a long way off; let's hope my honesty will pay dividends, and we can finally begin to live the rest of our life together.
Happy Australia Day
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On a much lighter note, today is Australia Day, and a national holiday here in Australia. Unlike Darrell, I have had the day off and spent it relaxing, something I don't do very often at the moment. Australia Day is a controversial date; it marks the landing of the First Fleet at Sydney Cove and the raising of the Union Flag by Arthur Phillip in 1788. This is therefore a white settler holiday and, for the aboriginal community, marks the destruction of their way of life and the culture they hold dear. Everyone who celebrates this day, should be conscious of that fact!

I have not celebrated today in the traditional sense, but I have followed events closely on television, purely out of curiosity.  It is important for me to immerse myself in all aspects of Australian culture, and today is just a part of that process!
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my adopted home of Perth, Western Australia.

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