Ah, supermarket shopping, the bane of my life, it is the one part of the week I hate. Usually my Aunt Trisha undertakes the weekly trip to procure supplies, but today I was persuaded to go into town with her and my Cousin Rachel. Trisha and Rachel had to buy some Christmas cards and since I had a day off, I towed along. The weather wasn't great  and it was pretty miserable outside, but spending time with family is good, rain or shine.

As you would expect, my favourite supermarket is Tesco; I work there, how could I say anything different. In all seriousness, I actually enjoy walking around the isles in this Fratton store and find the whole encounter far more enjoyable than many other retail experiences. In the past I would rush into a superstore, grab what I needed and run out, equally as fast. To be honest, having an Aunt who does the shopping is a bonus. It allows me to avoid those gleaming, inviting shelves and keeps my money firmly in my pocket. Going back ten years, I spent far more than I needed to. If I look back to 2006, I could spend a hundred and fifty pounds a week on food shopping and probably a lot more if I am truthful, so I am glad I am not doing the same today. It is easily done here; the variety and amount of goods on offer is huge and I am easily led!

Spain really changed my shopping habits; the supermarkets there were terrible. The service was the worst in the World, one would queue for half an hour just to join another queue to pay for ones shopping and the staff were rude and unapproachable. Equally the choice on offer was horrendous and as a couple we would have to cook everything from scratch; there were no short cuts.

I did become very self sufficient when I lived in Gran Alacant; living frugally, I spent no more than 20€ a week on groceries. What I did buy, lasted me a long time and I was able to make more than one meal with only a small amount of food; my days of living like a King were well and truly over and I had to learn a whole new way of life. If anything Spain taught me how to survive in a very unforgiving climate, so returning to Britain has been a breath of fresh air and reintroduced me back to civilization. I am jesting of course, Spain is as civilized as the UK, it just does things very differently.

When we got to the checkout today, there were no bags for our shopping and we had to use flimsy plastic carriers to take our purchases home, one bag splitting as soon as we left the car park, spilling shopping everywhere. This annoyed me, as you would expect and I vowed never to shop in ASDA again. Of course I will, but it just underlines why I shop at a particular outlet in the first place. It's not just about how much things cost, it's about the service you get and the attention you receive when you actually pay your bill. As a checkout operator, I am well versed in how to address members of the public. I have always worked in a retail environment so always treat customers how I would like to be treated. It really doesn't take a lot of energy to be polite and I am absolutely passionate about giving the best service I can, as I believe others should also!

So from an experience at the checkouts today I have rambled on about shopping long enough. This is what I love about blogging.....Sometimes it's the strangest situation that triggers a memory or gives one the motivation to write about a particular subject. Working in the retail sector gives me an valuable insight into the workings of a busy, supermarket, so when things go wrong while I am out shopping, I become more critical than I normally would. Running out of carrier bags is not the end of the World, but it is rather infuriating for the customer; I am proud to say it has never happened where I work and I hope it never happens again where I shop!

Today my partner and husband Darrell is celebrating his Birthday, at home in Australia. It is difficult being away from the person you love, especially at times of celebration, so today I thought I would speak briefly about our life together.

We met each other in 1995, whist Darrell was back packing around the UK, initially staying with friends in Newbury and later moving to Southampton. At first I didn't get on with this arrogant Ozzie and we rarely spoke, but gradually over time, we both became friends and later partners. When our relationship began twenty three years ago, we both ran away to Australia with just the clothes on our backs, establishing our relationship together. These were carefree, innocent times, happy days spent at first in London staying in the worst of hotels, with the happiest of memories, before we caught our flight to Perth, and finally Australia itself, a world away from the life I left behind!

We travelled from one side of the World to the other for a few years, eventually settling in Britain. I personally found it very difficult to adjust to Australian life and for twenty years we lived relatively happily in the UK. I say relatively, because our life was never really normal from the get go. Fighting successive Governments, to allow Darrell and I to remain together in the UK on a permanent basis, became a common aspect of our life. Deportation orders, Judicial Reviews and appeals to the Home Office, together with a change of Prime minister, eventually allowed us to stay together unhindered in 2001, after six years of battling.

During those 'bipolarcoaster' years we put much of our life on hold, unable to follow the careers we wanted, because of rules that prevented us from doing so. Both of us drifted from job to job, surviving and enjoying our new found freedoms. A combination of lifestyle and bullying, eventually opened the door for us to follow a new life in Spain. If we thought we battled in Britain, Spain was an altogether more intense period of hardship. The majority of the three years we spent living abroad we lived apart, as Darrell flew to and from Australia caring for his Mother, who was diagnosed with cancer a few months after our arrival.

We fought hard to stay in Spain, Darrell eventually obtaining his right to remain there, after returning indelibly in May 2017. For a while life was good; Darrell worked at Alicante Airport driving and I worked for a bar in Gran Alacant. This brief period of contentment didn't last like most things in our life, after the Spanish authorities threatened to remove his EU license, due to his Australian nationality. At this point we both decided enough was enough and I returned to the UK. Darrell remained in Spain to finish his employment contract and I began the process of reconnecting with family, after my Mother also fell seriously ill.

After four months Darrell returned to the UK before flying  to Australia to care for his ailing Mother, leaving me firmly rooted in Portsmouth, living with family, while my Mum also battles illness. We are both once again living apart for reasons beyond our control, but the enduring strength of longevity ensures we are very much a couple still, and will always be so.

As Darrell celebrates his Birthday with family in Australia, we are more self aware and comfortable with who we are than we ever have been. From a relationship that saw us together 24/7 for our first twenty years together,  to our current circumstances, forging our own unique ways in life independently, for now. The sense of achievement and satisfaction at our forbearance as a couple is palpable; I am proud of us and looking forward to a future that was born from adversity. We will survive because we have to, we are the sum of our own experiences because we have learned to, and we have a history behind us that dictates who we have become.

The milestones in our life our many, the journey is not yet over and I am looking forward to many more happy years together. Happy Birthday Darrell, all my love! x