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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'

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Christmas Thoughts - Ellie Raven!

30/11/2018

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"Christmas should be a time to contemplate people in less fortunate situations and to give thanks for the friends and family you have in your life. You shouldn't feel under pressure to spend money on gifts, especially when you don't have it. The best gifts you can give and receive, are spending time with the people you love!"



Ellie Raven
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Christmas Thoughts - Family!

29/11/2018

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Yesterday we put the Christmas decorations up at home; my Aunty was reluctant at first, since she normally decorates the house in December. Along with my Cousin Rachel, we did eventually persuade her to at least bedeck the sitting room.

This will be the first family Christmas I have been a part of in many years, probably about twelve in total. The festive season was always a happy time for me, magical and full of wonderful memories, spent with family and friends, but somewhere down the line all that changed and Darrell and I spent every Christmas on our own.

As a couple we very much tailored Christmas to our own needs, often inviting the odd waif and stray, who had nowhere else to go, giving them a Christmas meal and drink or two; it's what friends do, in the spirit of the day. It does always seem odd to me, that with all the friends we had as a couple, we were never invited somewhere for Christmas, but I understand this is a time for families and we really didn't fit into that mould.

My memories of Christmas go back as far as my early childhood, walking down stairs in the early hours, to find a lounge full to bursting with presents. The morning spent with my parents and an evening at my Nan's house, only a short walk away were all part of the annual festivities. These were fun filled, joyous Christmases surrounded by family, playing party games, eating copious amounts of food, drinking a Babycham or two and opening gifts, under a large tree.

Of course Christmas does change the older you get; most people have their own children and their celebrations evolve to encompass their new role in the World. Darrell and I never had kids of our own, consequently Christmas Day gradually became quieter and quieter until we moved to Spain and never really celebrated the season at all. That was a sad irony for me; the person who enjoyed the fairy lights, Christmas Carols and giving of gifts, had become bitter and resentful; by the time last Christmas arrived, I was reluctant to celebrate at all.

This year I am thankful to be around my kinfolk and can put the last twelve Christmases behind me. I am looking forward to spending quality time with those close, especially since I am not working on Christmas or Boxing Day. Darrell will be ten thousand miles away, over the other side of the World with his Mother on December the 25th, the only blot on my festive landscape....I can only look forward to a time when we can celebrate Christmas together once more, no longer estranged from family and loved ones and firmly back in the fold!

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Christmas Thoughts - Katie Gillett!

29/11/2018

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"I’m American, my husband is British and together we have a 3 year old son. Now that he’s getting older and becoming more aware of traditions and holiday festivities, we decided to fly to the states for Thanksgiving and will spend Christmas at home in the UK.

It’s sometimes tricky keeping our visits balanced and families happy, but it’s important to us to start our own family traditions. Seeing our son’s eyes light up with all the magic that the holidays bring is truly the best gift. It’s our turn now!"



Katie Gillett
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Supermarkets!

28/11/2018

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Ah, supermarket shopping, the bane of my life, it is the one part of the week I hate. Usually my Aunt Trisha undertakes the weekly trip to procure supplies, but today I was persuaded to go into town with her and my Cousin Rachel. Trisha and Rachel had to buy some Christmas cards and since I had a day off, I towed along. The weather wasn't great  and it was pretty miserable outside, but spending time with family is good, rain or shine.

As you would expect, my favourite supermarket is Tesco; I work there, how could I say anything different. In all seriousness, I actually enjoy walking around the isles in this Fratton store and find the whole encounter far more enjoyable than many other retail experiences. In the past I would rush into a superstore, grab what I needed and run out, equally as fast. To be honest, having an Aunt who does the shopping is a bonus. It allows me to avoid those gleaming, inviting shelves and keeps my money firmly in my pocket. Going back ten years, I spent far more than I needed to. If I look back to 2006, I could spend a hundred and fifty pounds a week on food shopping and probably a lot more if I am truthful, so I am glad I am not doing the same today. It is easily done here; the variety and amount of goods on offer is huge and I am easily led!

Spain really changed my shopping habits; the supermarkets there were terrible. The service was the worst in the World, one would queue for half an hour just to join another queue to pay for ones shopping and the staff were rude and unapproachable. Equally the choice on offer was horrendous and as a couple we would have to cook everything from scratch; there were no short cuts.

I did become very self sufficient when I lived in Gran Alacant; living frugally, I spent no more than 20€ a week on groceries. What I did buy, lasted me a long time and I was able to make more than one meal with only a small amount of food; my days of living like a King were well and truly over and I had to learn a whole new way of life. If anything Spain taught me how to survive in a very unforgiving climate, so returning to Britain has been a breath of fresh air and reintroduced me back to civilization. I am jesting of course, Spain is as civilized as the UK, it just does things very differently.

When we got to the checkout today, there were no bags for our shopping and we had to use flimsy plastic carriers to take our purchases home, one bag splitting as soon as we left the car park, spilling shopping everywhere. This annoyed me, as you would expect and I vowed never to shop in ASDA again. Of course I will, but it just underlines why I shop at a particular outlet in the first place. It's not just about how much things cost, it's about the service you get and the attention you receive when you actually pay your bill. As a checkout operator, I am well versed in how to address members of the public. I have always worked in a retail environment so always treat customers how I would like to be treated. It really doesn't take a lot of energy to be polite and I am absolutely passionate about giving the best service I can, as I believe others should also!

So from an experience at the checkouts today I have rambled on about shopping long enough. This is what I love about blogging.....Sometimes it's the strangest situation that triggers a memory or gives one the motivation to write about a particular subject. Working in the retail sector gives me an valuable insight into the workings of a busy, supermarket, so when things go wrong while I am out shopping, I become more critical than I normally would. Running out of carrier bags is not the end of the World, but it is rather infuriating for the customer; I am proud to say it has never happened where I work and I hope it never happens again where I shop!

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Christmas Thoughts - Stephen C Hick!

28/11/2018

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"So, someone asked me to get down my thoughts about Christmas and not to swear – so here goes.

Every culture with a cold dark winter puts a festival in the middle of it, it basically stops us from killing each other, and ourselves, the fire is stoked the food and drink flows freely, people literally “eat, drink and be merry”. These traditions far predate christian worship and nor are they owned by modern day pagans, it predates every known form of worship.

Christmas, holidays, xmas, nadelik (that’s Cornish btw), midwinter, festival whatever you want to call it it is yours alone and it is everyone’s. We have private rituals and great acts of public togetherness, it brings out the best in us and it exposes our worst, we see the best as people genuinely try to give goodwill to all and the worst as we see loneliness and poverty all around.

To quote freely “ask not what xmas can do for you but what you can do for xmas”, human kindness is so underrated, it does good and it makes you feel good and if you can do it for xmas why can’t you do it at all times of the year? Your overworked neighbour will still be overworked in spring, the bullied kid down the road will still get bullied in summer, and you’ll still tut next year at the lonely old lady on pension day holding up the queue because you’re in a hurry because she hasn’t spoken to anyone in over a week and is literally dying for a chat.

We can all make a difference, we can all be kinder, we can all take the time to love more, hate less and potentially change or save someone’s life with a kind word and a cuppa. How good would that make you feel, imagine a genuine season of goodwill that lasts all year long x"


Stephen C Hick

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Christmas Thoughts - Alastair Thompson!

27/11/2018

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"Christmas is a great time of year because everyone comes together to enjoy the good times. I also think Christmas is an important time to love those less fortunate than ourselves including the homeless who will appreciate the small acts of kindness during a largely cold and lonely festive season!"




Alastair Thompson
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Christmas Thoughts - Anita Leiber!

26/11/2018

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       Anita Leiber
"Christmas A season to spend… not money but time with your nearest and dearest and perhaps even with the less fortunate …

A season to hope... not for the gift you requested but for a better and brighter future …

A season to be thankful… not for your presents but for having a roof over your head and food on the table…

A season to give… not a beautifully wrapped surprise but a thought to those who can’t be at home with family and loved ones…
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After you have spent, hoped, been thankful and given then… your Christmas will be fulfilled… A joyous Christmas to all."

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Soulmate!

26/11/2018

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Today my partner and husband Darrell is celebrating his Birthday, at home in Australia. It is difficult being away from the person you love, especially at times of celebration, so today I thought I would speak briefly about our life together.

We met each other in 1995, whist Darrell was back packing around the UK, initially staying with friends in Newbury and later moving to Southampton. At first I didn't get on with this arrogant Ozzie and we rarely spoke, but gradually over time, we both became friends and later partners. When our relationship began twenty three years ago, we both ran away to Australia with just the clothes on our backs, establishing our relationship together. These were carefree, innocent times, happy days spent at first in London staying in the worst of hotels, with the happiest of memories, before we caught our flight to Perth, and finally Australia itself, a world away from the life I left behind!

We travelled from one side of the World to the other for a few years, eventually settling in Britain. I personally found it very difficult to adjust to Australian life and for twenty years we lived relatively happily in the UK. I say relatively, because our life was never really normal from the get go. Fighting successive Governments, to allow Darrell and I to remain together in the UK on a permanent basis, became a common aspect of our life. Deportation orders, Judicial Reviews and appeals to the Home Office, together with a change of Prime minister, eventually allowed us to stay together unhindered in 2001, after six years of battling.

During those 'bipolarcoaster' years we put much of our life on hold, unable to follow the careers we wanted, because of rules that prevented us from doing so. Both of us drifted from job to job, surviving and enjoying our new found freedoms. A combination of lifestyle and bullying, eventually opened the door for us to follow a new life in Spain. If we thought we battled in Britain, Spain was an altogether more intense period of hardship. The majority of the three years we spent living abroad we lived apart, as Darrell flew to and from Australia caring for his Mother, who was diagnosed with cancer a few months after our arrival.

We fought hard to stay in Spain, Darrell eventually obtaining his right to remain there, after returning indelibly in May 2017. For a while life was good; Darrell worked at Alicante Airport driving and I worked for a bar in Gran Alacant. This brief period of contentment didn't last like most things in our life, after the Spanish authorities threatened to remove his EU license, due to his Australian nationality. At this point we both decided enough was enough and I returned to the UK. Darrell remained in Spain to finish his employment contract and I began the process of reconnecting with family, after my Mother also fell seriously ill.

After four months Darrell returned to the UK before flying  to Australia to care for his ailing Mother, leaving me firmly rooted in Portsmouth, living with family, while my Mum also battles illness. We are both once again living apart for reasons beyond our control, but the enduring strength of longevity ensures we are very much a couple still, and will always be so.

As Darrell celebrates his Birthday with family in Australia, we are more self aware and comfortable with who we are than we ever have been. From a relationship that saw us together 24/7 for our first twenty years together,  to our current circumstances, forging our own unique ways in life independently, for now. The sense of achievement and satisfaction at our forbearance as a couple is palpable; I am proud of us and looking forward to a future that was born from adversity. We will survive because we have to, we are the sum of our own experiences because we have learned to, and we have a history behind us that dictates who we have become.

The milestones in our life our many, the journey is not yet over and I am looking forward to many more happy years together. Happy Birthday Darrell, all my love! x

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Christmas Thoughts - Yassin Hamrouni!

26/11/2018

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"Christmas is the time to touch every heart with love and care. Christmas is the time to receive and send blessings. It is the time to breathe the magic in the air. Wishing you a very Merry Christmas."


Yassin Hamrouni
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Christmas Thoughts - Tömas Moor!

25/11/2018

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"I'm not normally a Christmasy person, being a retail drone and all that, but I'll sometimes get a strange moment of 'clarity' when I walk past a set of Christmas lights twinkling in the frosty air, or I catch the smell of mulled wine and cinnamon in the air, and I'll just think "ya know what, Christmas isn't really all that bad, is it!"



Tömas Moor
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my adopted home of Perth, Western Australia.

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    A place to call home
    Finally, a place we can call home.  A community of like minded individuals, who used to call Britain home.  Now Spain is our choice, an altogether gentler, happier, sunnier and safer experience!
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  • Blog
  • The Story Of Us
  • Other Blogs
    • Forever Enduring Cycles Blog 2015 >
      • Forever Enduring Cycles
      • Bipolarcoaster
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  • Gallery
  • Spain
    • First Month
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  • My Writing
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