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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'
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Farewell to friends!

24/1/2016

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Stephen and Shaun

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I have to say, all this emotional overload, is turning me into a nervous wreck.  These are the people, who should have been in our life and it is only now, after what we have been through, that we can finally see that.  Far too late as per usual.  I am, however, glad, they have been with us, for our final flight!
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Darrell and myself, along with Chris, arrived at 12.30pm and settled down to have a beer.  I had no idea what Natalee had planned for us.

​At 1pm on the dot, I was shocked to see my besties Stephen and Shaun turn up.  This was no easy task, since they both live in Cornwall and had driven for four hours to say goodbye to us.
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Natalee is such a great girl.  I am going to miss her so much, she has done so much for me, it really is going to be a wrench.  How does one say goodbye to such a close, loyal and wonderful person.  Well there are going to be more tears for sure.  If there are any left.  I have been saving them especially for that very day I depart!
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You have made my final week here in The UK, happy and pleasurable.  I look forward to your Wedding this year and spending time with us in Europe on your Honeymoon x
I'm beginning to feel a bit like a condemned man at the moment.  With a steady flow of visitors from my dim and distant past filing into Capri, it feels a bit like being on death row and could very well end up that way!

​On the plus side, it really does show, just how many good and valued friends we do have, more than I care to remember.  We are bloody lucky!
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Surprise Visit!

On Friday, Natalee had told us to meet her at The Giddy Bridge.  To be honest, I was in a mood and really did not want to go!
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Now our Natalee is not known for keeping secrets, but on this occasion, she had helped arrange for them both to come to Southampton and managed to keep it quiet.  It was the best surprise I could have ever asked for.

​These two are special to me, and I love them dearly, so to see them before we emigrate was wonderful.  I am still tearful about it now!
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Jamie and Natalee came to Capri after work and it was nice to spend quality time with close friends. 

​When Stephen and Shaun left, I was understandably upset and cried yet again, because I have really realised, just how important friends are in my life and by God they have been there for us!
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Gemma Wooldridge

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The ever enduring memory I have of Gemma, is her riding her horse up to the garage we ran in a tiny village.  Not a care in the world as she rode Saxon up to the petrol pumps.  Village life suited us then and a quieter existence is just what we need now,  We met many wonderful characters, just like Gemma and her even more eccentric mother, who was always the life and soul of the village, never putting more than £2.50 worth of fuel in her car!
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Gemma always loved  the Christmas Parties, which I will add, were paid for by me, as all employers should do!

​Gemma likes a drink, always dresses to shock, even putting a bit of lippy on, which she rarely does and always manages to have just one too many

​Love to all of you, who visited over the last few days! x
Yet another surprise visitor yesterday evening. Darling Gemma.  One of the most gorgeous people I have ever met.  Beaming smile, endearing laugh and as bubbly as a bubble bath.  We met Gemma in the year 2000, when we employed her, in a business we were running at the time.  We have always remained friends.  She has also been there for me, during some dark times, which I thank her for!
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As a local village shop, as well, I will never forget Gemma's Mother, trying to tick cigarettes, telling us to give her daughter the bill and in the days before chip and pin, borrowing her daughters card, in the hope we wouldn't notice!

​There are no airs and graces with Gemma, what you see is what you get.  She is a typical horse loving, village lass, with a heart of gold!
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Farewell to friends!

23/1/2016

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Firstly, a big thank you to Kiefer Bunday, for coming over, during the last few days.  Like your brother, you have been a constant in our life for many years.  I will always have fond memories of both you and of course your family.  You are a proud Dad and a hard, successful worker.  I know you will enjoy success in whatever you do, because you deserve it!
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'Going to miss you all.  It has been a bumpy ride.  Couldn't have done it without you!'

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To SJ, you are really the biggest success story I know.  I never dreamed we would be so close.  When I was in the darkest of places, you were there, happy, recovered and the strength I did not have.

​You have proven to me, that there really is another life.  We are both so similar, in so many ways, least of all the condition we suffer with.
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Jamie

Jamie seemed to be in a bad way, when he came over.  He broke down on several occasions and asked for help!
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New Start

We are going to try and give Jamie a new start, something he needs, just like us. Moving to Spain was never top of my list of priorities,  but it has become something we have to do.
This is going to be a difficult blog for me to write.  Usually when  I write an entry, the words flow out easy enough.  Today is very different, I am really having to think about what and how to write it.  As usual, I have a lot to say, but there is also a lot of emotions involved.  Those things I usually avoid, so I will give it my best shot!
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Both you and your brother, Chris have always offered your support.  You are both indeed family, in all but name.

​Always remember, we are both there for you, no matter where we.  ​ ​I will even miss you turning up on our doorstep at 3am Kiefer.

​Much love and respect to you and all the Bunday's.  We will truly miss you!
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Natalee.  One of the few people, I ever take notice of.  I will never forget what you did for me.  Not seeing you, is going to be so hard.  I am so proud of you.  I will certainly shed a few tears  on the 31st, for you alone! 

​Of course, I will never forget that Motherly stare, also.  Love you! x
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People always use our illness as an excuse to blame us, also.  Like you, our experiences have taught us to be guarded, but at least we both managed to lower that barrier, long enough to form one of the most special friendships I have.  I have learned more from you than many people I have known for years!
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I suppose we all need some help at different points in our life. when things get too much, or when our lives take a downward turn.

Wrong people and wrong choices seem to be the key here.  That was proven in full, over the last few days.
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Southampton has never been a great place for me to live, it has always been full, of some of the worst people in the world,  This will be restart number four or so for us, after still making the same mistakes, time and time again.  Thankfully this time, I can start to make my own choices, just like Jamie and tell people where to go.  These people mean nothing to me.  The only important thing is the new start I crave and the future Jamie deserves also!
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​Not only was you Mother, my boss, she was also a friend and great motivator.  Although my illness stopped us from forming a much closer friendship, both you and your sister and of course Mother, were always there open armed.  Even at my lowest, there was no hesitation.

Carly

Thank you so much for popping round last weekend, so we could continue are farewell chat.  You are such a wonderful young lady.  From that adorable kid we used to babysit, you have become successful, wise and knowledgeable, especially about what happened to us.

​The chat I had with you, although difficult, made me realise, just what you and your Mother mean to me!
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I have so many cherished memories with you all, that I can only say thank you.  Before you left, you called us part of your family.  From someone, who lost theirs a while back, those words are the best you could ever offer.  An open heart is a good one, that's why I am proud to call you all 'Family!'

Hilary

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Hilary is dedicated in all she does.  She works hard and it was a pleasure to be a part of hiring you for the job, you truly made your own.  I am honoured to have met you and moved at your help and dedication for us, as well as the support and inspiration your gave your team.  You are the reason, others aspire to move forward, with vigour!
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Like you, we are moving on to a new life.  Positivity has to triumph over negativity, you taught me that Hilary.  We aim to use you as the example we should live up too and hope to lead the kind of life that made you so happy. 

​Thanks for being friends, all of you!
We are really pulling out all the stops during our final fortnight, here in The UK, and I wanted to mention a very special friend and ex work colleague.  Our friendship was born from the damage that engulfed our lives for so long.  This is a friendship that will last a life time, because people like Hilary are difficult to find and her place in my heart will always be there!
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We have been through some testing times, you and us, but you know what, we won in the end.  We have a friendship, built on solid foundations, that no one can take away from us!

​As you welcomed us into your home, so you are always welcome in ours.  We always hope to keep in touch, especially to those who were with us, at our darkest hour!
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NEW HOME

15/1/2016

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New Home!

We did a fare amount of searching, and we came up with this place, in a secret location, in an area of Spain we have both fallen in love with, we couldn't be happier!
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So this is our new home, from 31 January.  Finally we will be living in Spain, our dream for so long.  The house is extremely near to the coast, has use of a pool and is just what we both wanted!
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We hope all of our friends and family will come out and stay with us as often as they can.  You are all always more than welcome and our life would not be the same without you!  Thank you, everyone, for all your support!
We popped In  on our Jamie and Kirsty to show them the new house, well Jamie is going to be living with us on 31 January too.  God he looks like he is going to need to a break, after all the hours he puts in at work!
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​​Bye, bye Jack!

We went with Jack, to The Chilworth Arms.  I think he felt a bit out of place.  He reckoned it was a bit posh for him.  To be honest, he was hungover from last night, after ending up in Southampton's worst club, Pop World. Yes  Pop World was voted the worst club in the whole of The UK.  Now there's a reason to leave!
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I think we will probably go to see Martin at the 'Showboat'.  Just to prove I can do Benidorm as well, even if it is only for a day or two.

​Hope you all have a great Wednesday night.  Another busy day ahead for me tomorrow!

​Peace and Love, Always!
God, what a busy day I have had today.  Literally, I haven't stopped.  This morning, we rushed up to see Rachel, my dear friend from School.  She helped us find a place a Spain to live.  Boy oh boy, did she help us.
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It is a lovely town house in 'The Best' area of Spain.  Two bedrooms, roof terrace, solarium  and ample living space.  We are actually delighted with it, and can't wait to move in.

​It has been such a long road from Easter, last year, to now, that we are just relieved, that finally we can both live our dream, away from some of the worst people we have ever known!

Happiness, finally!

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For me, it is actually quite an emotional day.  It is the beginning of a new start, a new life and a new beginning.  It is a farewell to the UK and a looking forward to a new, brighter future, what more could you want!  The number 24, popped up again as well!  The number 24 is an important number for me and oddly, the number of our new house is also 24!
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Family!

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Baby Imogen!

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Anyway, we had a few beers and something to eat.  Burgers for Jack and Darrell and Pork, Black Pudding and Scallops!
Jamie and Kirsty have popped round this evening to sort out the details of our departure to Spain.

​Myself and Jamie are flying to Spain on the 31 January and need to book a top class hotel for a few days, before Darrell arrives with our life in a van.

​We are thinking of a couple of days in Benidorm, to get into the spirit of things, before collecting the new keys for the house, the week after.
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Furniture Removal

12/1/2016

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The British Heart Foundation have just arrived, to remove all of our furniture, as we continue to get ready for the move to Spain.  It is actually quite a sad day for me.  I have collected a lot of antique furniture over the years, but sadly selling it is not an option.  Peoples tastes change over time and 'Brown' furniture as it is called has gone out of fashion.  It is sad that this is the case, but then I am quite old fashioned on that front!  So I'm sat in the lounge at Capri, watching item after item being put on to their van and in many ways I am just glad it is going to a good cause, and yes, the British Heart Foundation is a great cause!
We have decided to let everything go.  Sleigh Bed, bedroom furniture, lounge and dining room furniture.  There is very little point taking anything to Spain!
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Just Mollie Sugden, looking out  through the upstairs hall window, that's all that's left upstairs. 

​I'm taking Mollie with me.  She has played a big part in my life, believe it or not. 

​I grew up with her on the television during the 1970s, she was the funniest woman on TV and I think she also deserves a new start in Spain as well.  We can't get rid of all our memories, nor do we want too.  Removing the worst memories from our life, has already been done, we are just left with the happy images that remain!
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Next Stop Spain!

Peace and love, always!
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I would like to this the lads at British Heart Foundation, for all their hard work today.  They took all of the furniture we had, were totally respectful and thanked us. 

​Darrell and myself have had some terrible experiences with charities lately, that we were reluctant to involve or use any charity again, but I have to say The BHF restored our faith in charity and the good work they do.

​We got Chris cleaning his room, after everything was removed.  That'll be a first for him anyway.  Capri is looking pretty bare now.  I am not as bothered as I thought I would be and to be honest I am just looking forward a better future away from here!
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The box room, is also clear, all the furniture finally removed.  It's funny really, I never realised, just how big Gay Capri was.  There was so much stuff here. Now, you feel the cold and here the echo's throughout the house.
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Bye Bye Ali and Carly

11/1/2016

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Texaco

I started to work for Texaco in 1999, Ali was the General Manager and at the beginning, used to scare me shitless,  Actually she was a great boss, who I had the utmost respect for!
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Me! Bitter?

Gosh, I sound bitter, don't I, but then I have every reason to be!  I DIGRESS I KNOW, BUT AS TIME GOES ON, I WILL MAKE MY FEELINGS VERY, VERY CLEAR!

​So we have known Ali for about 17 years.  She was there through some rough times, as she is for us today!
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Here we are again, and more goodbyes with the great and good of Southampton.  Tonight we popped over to see Ali and Carly, to say fare thee well!

​Now what can I say about Ali.  Ali was one of the best bosses I have ever worked with, unlike the last one.  She was also a great friend, who we have always held in high regard!
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Whatever happened to good bosses? that's what I want to know.  If you treat your employees well and not like something you scraped off your shoe, you will get great workers, hard and dedicated workers.  That is something, other 50 something, nasty and totally intolerable sociopaths could learn from.

​Ali could teach those who need it a lot and believe me, she would command a lot more respect, than those we are leaving behind!
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I am so glad we remained friends with Ali and her family.  Despite not seeing a lot of The Bott Family in recent times, they will always remain an important part of our life.

​Good friends are hard to come by in this world.  We hope to see all of them in Spain.  They are welcome whenever they like.  Much love x

Ali and Carly 2016

Ali and Carly 2002

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Bye Bye Ramona!

11/1/2016

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Spain Preparations

Jason is finalising the booking for the van today.  The company we are using, is allowing us to leave the van in Spain, so we don't have to drive the thing back.  The only difficulty at the moment, is the fact that so many people are leaving for Spain, but so few are actually coming back. Fingers crossed on that one!
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Ramona

Just got back from lunch with  Ramona.  Went to Cargo in Oxford Street, my favourite street to eat in Southampton!
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I have mentioned Ramona in both bipolarcoaster and foreverenduringcycles.  She is my oldest friend.  I went to University with her in 1992 and we have always stayed friends, ever since.  Constantly leading each other astray.  Although very different to each other, oddly we have both been leading  very similar lives, over five years, and we never knew it.

​Like Ramona, in the end, I resigned from my job.  There is no point continuing working with people, who are bad, bullying and backstabbing!
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Loads more people to see before we go.  To be perfectly honest, I have absolutely no time to work at the moment,  Saying goodbye to people is a full time occupation.

​Ramona has kindly invited us to Sunday lunch this week also.  It is a shame, that with all our busy lives, we only ever find the time to really see people under such strange circumstances.  Still, at least it has given us the opportunity to see old friends.

​Can't wait to see you all in Spain!
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Got up bright and early today.  Had a busy day ahead.  It was sad to hear of the death of David Bowie, my fondest memory of which, involves him playing a part in the film 'Dune'.  This just happens to be one of my most favourite films, mainly due to the connection with Mother, Paul Judd, who I wrote about in my first blog, bipolarcoaster.co.uk.
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Euro's

Been drawing out cash, to put into Euro's over the last few days.  I have put the bulk of the money into an account already, but since Jamie and myself are going to be left in Southern Spain for a while, I need to get some ready cash, so that's the first thing to do today
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Pork Belly

As farewell lunches go, it was great.  Had Pork Belly, with root vegetables and a watercress and stilton salad.  It was bloody gorgeous actually!​
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New Life

Ramona, has managed to move on, from the most destructive period of her life.  As readers of my blogs are aware, we are in the process of moving on ourselves.  Ramona seems happier, more relaxed and a lot more content!


Bye Bye Oxford Street
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Aunty Myra!

10/1/2016

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Bye Bye Aunty Myra

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National Treasure

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Elaine

Our oldest dearest mate, Elaine turned up at Myra's too and to be honest we all had a great afternoon. I'm seriously going to miss these two!
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Elaine will also be out there as soon as she can.  She has been on holiday with us before, to Croatia.  Hopefully My and Elaine will come out together.  I know Aunty My was in Benidorm this year, she showed us the photo's when we got there.
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Darrell and I are still in the process of saying goodbye to everyone here in the UK.  You don't actually realise, just how many people you know and love, until, like us, you move away.  We have a hell of a lot of farewells to make.  Today we went to see Aunty Myra, who both Darrell and I have known for many years.  She is our National Treasure!
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Myra is the sister of a friend, Jean, who we used to employ, when we ran our own business.  We are talking many years ago, and both Jean and Myra, used  to attend many of our fancy dress parties as well as our Curry nights with the girls.​
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Spain

Aunty Myra loves Spain and goes as often as she can, which is why I know, she will be the first one out to visit us, when we move on the 31st January
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Aunty Myra is exactly like me.  She has bling all over the house, loves her diamante's, tiaras and anything shiny.  I'm going to miss her loads!
Anyway, we ordered the biggest curry we could, for old times sake, just like we used to in the old days and had a great afternoon.  God damn I love a good curry!
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We are leaving many good people, behind, we know that, but the most comforting thing, is listening to friends and family, like Myra, speak positively about our decision.  They are well aware of our circumstances and it really does make our decision, that much easier, when we have the support of such good people.  Going to miss you all!
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Three Weeks

9/1/2016

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Felicity

It was a bit of a catch up day today. The 9 January 2016, was actually my last official day at Oxfam, although I had been on holiday for the last few weeks, so in reality, I left Oxfam a long time ago, not only in head and heart but also spirit!
Felicity, one of my old volunteers had invited Darrell and I around to her house, just round the corner from us at Capri, for tea.  She hadn't seen me since I left, so it was a chance to catch up and discuss the future.

​Felicity was the first volunteer I employed, eight years ago, we have always had a close working relationship and she wanted to have a chat before we leave.  Felicity herself is a Volcanologist and is off to Ecuador in a week, to do some research.  Myself and Darrell promised to have lunch with her next Thursday and will of course endeavour to keep in touch with her, whilst on our travels.

​She has her own views on what has happened, not dissimilar to ours and quite understands why we are moving to Europe. In fact, she said, anyone in our position would probably do the same.  It will be sad to leave people like Felicity behind, but it is also so pleasing for is, that we have met such wonderful people, who have enriched our life.  Our door will always be open, both now and in the future!

Natalee Michelle

We left Flicks house at 11.30am and went home to continue doing some sorting out.  We made up some more boxes for Charity and then set off to pick up Natalee for lunch.  We are trying to fit in as many lunch dates as we can before we go!
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Natalee had a good few hours for lunch.  It was a dark, rainy day outside, so it was nice, sat in a warm pub, eating comfort food, talking about the future.  Natalee said she was thinking about going into hospitality again,  She works ,long hours caring, and to be honest, is it really worth it?
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Carly was out having a few beers, before some football match, she was going too.  Can't stand the bloody game myself.  Anyway we promised to go and see her and Ali before we leave.  So many people to see, so little time!
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Lunch

We tried to get a table at Trago Lounge in Portswood.  I absolutely love that place, but as I do, so do half of Southampton, so we went to The Fleming arms in Swaythling!

Carly

While we were out to lunch, we bumped into Carly.  Carly is the daughter of our old Boss Ali.  Darrell and myself babysat Carly and her sister many years ago!
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Relaxing

Had loads of food and drink and it was nice to finally relax a little, after such an awful time recently.  There is very little I am going to miss about living in the UK, although those people closest to me  will of course be top of that list.

​We are going to fit as many people as we can in the next three weeks and hopefully have some happy memories to take with us!

​Peace and Love Always!
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my adopted home of Perth, Western Australia.

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    A place to call home
    Finally, a place we can call home.  A community of like minded individuals, who used to call Britain home.  Now Spain is our choice, an altogether gentler, happier, sunnier and safer experience!
            Luke Feb 16
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