Trust?

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Well as we reach our sixth month in Spain, we are still learning the lessons of the past.  I can not live or associate with anyone I don't have conviction in. When we invited Jamie to live with us in Spain, I had 100% trust and belief in him as a person, as I still do.  He was part of the reason we came here and he is, at least for now an important reason to stay.  Jamie will of course return home at some point and then we will continue to move forwards as a couple, without him with us.

We have also made mistakes.  Inviting the wrong person to stay was a dreadful experience.  When someone drinks, every single day, you soon realise, they have no care for anyone but themselves.  Drinking, getting drunk and partying is the only thing that matters to them.  They use those around them, without a second thought.  When the bills come through and the rent needs paying, they are gone, having spent everything they earn on their own selfish activity.

Sometimes you pick the wrong friends in life, that happens to all of us.  We have both tended to do it more than most.   Being a bad judge of character and opening our hearts and homes to the worst people, have always been a problem.  To be honest though, I never saw this one coming.  I had a real sense of belief in someone who had done much for me in the past, but for whatever reasons,  had decided to become, change and transform into a person I no longer knew, who refused to see past the drink in the bottom of their glass.

When Jamie, Darrell and myself moved to Spain, we came here to start a new, productive life, and remove ourselves from people who were bad and no longer entertain those who quite simply, only thought of themselves and things were good. The three of us worked well together and looked out for each other. That all changed dramatically, when there were four.

Alcoholism, like any addiction is an abhorrent thing.  It is difficult to overcome and is an illness, that needs to be cured.  I never knew that this individual was quite as bad, as they are now, but clearly they have reached an uncontrollable level of drinking, and have no regard for others around them.

Yes we have been left out of pocket, yet again.  As Jamie said, that is the story of our life.  Rent owed, water, electricity, all still unpaid.  Should I really have been that surprised?  Well yes I am.  I had more faith in this person, than they had respect for us. They are gone forever, never, ever to return, in any capacity. Our life can finally move once again in the right direction.  They have indeed left debris behind, debts, damage to a window they used to break into our house, drunk, but at least they have finally left.

I have absolutely no tolerance left for anyone who takes from us.  I have no more forgiveness within me and I will never trust anyone I have known for a short space of time again.  Like the rest of the rabble we left behind, they will very soon fade away to just another bad memory.  I am kind of immune to this sort of behaviour these days, but unlike the past, today,  I will give anyone, acting this way, short shrift.

​Onwards and upwards, as the saying goes and all I can do now, is just feel sorry for whoever else has to put up with what gets thrown their way from a person who was never who they claimed to be!

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