Roaming Brit
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From a new life in spain, to an old life in britain, 'roaming brit' documents uncertain times!

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On 31st January 2016, my partner and I left Southampton to start a new life as Expats in Gran Alacant, on the Costa Blanca. This blog will document our journey, as we navigate the Spanish system, travelling a path untried and untested. With Brexit looming, political turmoil in Europe and an unpredictable future, harsh decisions have to be made. Illness, family bonds and a Change of heart all make for challenging times in a life of a 'Roaming Brit!'

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No Wives Club!

23/11/2016

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The key to success!


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Yesterday was the first meeting of the 'No Wives Club!'  All of us out for the day, without our husbands or wives; just a tongue in cheek way of looking at our situation. We all met at Dawn's lovely home, perched on the top of a cliff, overlooking the mediterranean.  Even though we are heading towards the end of November, the weather was great; you could see straight across the sea towards Benidorm.  The house is in a stunning position, just what Spain is all about!
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After a coffee at Dawns, she took us all to lunch at El Hatsikidee, a wonderful Dutch restaurant at the GA Centre.  It was the first time, I had ever been there and it was great.  The food was delicious, the service was wonderful!

Had  a wonderful afternoon and evening back at Dawns.  It is good to be around people in similar situations, it does help to cope with the daily problems associated with living apart from one's partner.  All of us are able to give each other advice, especially at times, when you may feel lonely.  Darrell is away longer than any other partner, but all of us are experiencing the same feelings. If it wasn't for this group of friends, life at the moment would be far more difficult than it is.  
The most important thing to remember, when you are spending long periods apart from your partner, is that you are not alone.  There are other people in your position, many of whom suffer far more than you.  I have learned after four months to cope with my situation.  This is in part due to my own mechanisms, but it is also through following guidance from others.  

​If I were to give advice to someone living apart from their partner, I can only say how I manage, what works best for me, but of course everyone is different.  Firstly have a good network of friends; we are talking quality here, not quantity.  So far, so good for me.  The people who are close to me are fabulous and make everyday easier. Secondly, do not phone, skype or message your partner everyday; all this does, is make the whole experience more painful.  Currently I speak to Darrell, maybe once a week, even less sometimes.  With your other half away, you still have your own life to lead and that does not include him or her for a temporary time.  Live your life, normally!  Thirdly get out, as often as you can.  Sitting in four walls, does not help you; it just makes you think about your situation more.  Keeping oneself active and occupied also helps to divert attention into other, more productive tasks!  Lastly, get a pet.  This really does help with the loneliness.  I would not be without my two cats.

Everyone does have their own ways of coping in difficult situations.  Many of you may disagree with the methods I use.  In all honesty, for me they work pretty well.  However you manage and survive, the one thing that you should always hold on too, is, the situation you are in, is only temporary.  This realisation, makes muddling through, that much easier!
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    51-year-old Author and professional blogger. Expat formerly living in Gran Alacant on the Costa Blanca! Currently, residing in my home town of Portsmouth on the south coast of England!

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    A place to call home
    Finally, a place we can call home.  A community of like minded individuals, who used to call Britain home.  Now Spain is our choice, an altogether gentler, happier, sunnier and safer experience!
            Luke Feb 16
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  • Blog
  • The Story Of Us
  • Other Blogs
    • Forever Enduring Cycles Blog 2015 >
      • Forever Enduring Cycles
      • Bipolarcoaster
      • Books For Sale
  • Gallery
  • Spain
    • First Month
    • Three Months
    • Six Months
    • One Year
    • 2 Year Anniversary
    • Spanish Views
    • Gran Alacant >
      • GA Advertiser
      • Gran Alacant News
      • LoungeD
      • No Wives Club
  • About
    • New Life
    • Wedding
    • 21 Years
    • Timeline
    • My Story
    • Australia 2016/17
  • Guest Bloggers
    • Penelope Wren
    • Debra Rufini
    • Claire Coe
    • Richard Guy
    • Optimistic Mummy
    • Julie Rawlinson
    • Letters Of Hope
  • Links
  • Contact
  • My Writing
    • Short Stories From My Youth
    • Verruca Almond
    • The Streets