Grammar!

Yesterday, I was writing my blog as usual, when suddenly I realised something wasn't quite right, in the grammatical sense. When referring to Darrell and I in a sentence, I would often write 'Darrell and myself.' preferring the way it sounded, always believing  'Darrell and I,' or 'My husband and I,' to be a little pretentious. Well I decided to look up this way of referring to two people online; checking my grammar; my stomach sunk. I have actually been using this phrase incorrectly; it doesn't make sense. Today I have a lot of work to do, correcting quite a few mistakes. Although the phrase 'Darrell and myself,' is technically incorrect, I have also researched this subject on the net and  discovered it is widely used informally; informal English if you like. A little bit of a get out clause for me, but nevertheless I still need to address some of my more erudite entries. and give myself a slap around the wrists!

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"Myself" is used to refer back to yourself if you've already mentioned yourself in a sentence. Like, "I gave the award for best fisherman to myself", as opposed to "I gave ... to me." It is also used to make clear or emphasize that you performed the action and not someone else. "I caught the fish myself" means I did it, not someone else, and I had no or minimal help.

"Myself" is also sometimes used as an alternate or polite form of "I" or "me". I think this is really grammatically incorrect, but it's fairly common. So "John and myself decided ..." would be acceptable, at least in informal speech. Jay from Michigan, USA, at English Language Learners, Stack Exchange.

The idea of 'informal English,' crops up again and again. Like most things in life, English is evolving. When writing a blog, I believe one should write as one speaks; informally if you so wish. I don't particularly want to write in a way, that I don't feel comfortable with. However I have to acknowledge the proper, formal, acceptable way of referring to myself and a friend in a sentence.

Digging into the topic a little deeper, myself is what's called a reflexive pronoun. That can be hard to remember, but just think about looking into a mirror and seeing your reflection. You'd say, “I see myself in the mirror.” You see your reflection, and myself is a reflexive pronoun.

Other reflexive pronouns include himself, herself, yourself, itself, and themselves. A reflexive pronoun is always the object of a sentence; it can never be the subject. Grammar Girl has talked about it before, but a subject is the one doing something in a sentence, and the object is the one having something done to it. If I step on Squiggly, I am the subject and Squiggly is the object.

You would never say, “Myself stepped on Squiggly,” so you would also never say, “Aardvark and myself stepped on Squiggly.”

Another case where it is correct to use myself is when you are both the subject and the object of a sentence. For example, “I see myself playing marimbas,” or, “I'm going to treat myself to a mud bath.” In both of these cases you are the object of your own action, so myself is the right word to use. By Mignon Fogarty, Grammar Girl at quickanddirtytips.com 

Yesterday whilst working at LoungeD, I was discussing my literary dilemma, with a couple of customers. Luckily for me, they happened to understand what I was talking about. By the end of the conversation we all agreed formal was best; so in future that is the way I will write my words, when discussing my partner and I, no matter how much I dislike it! Part of blogging is about learning; this has indeed been a process of understanding. I may well enjoy writing, but I am not a Professor of Grammar; I'll leave that to the experts!

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