Early Morning Walk!

I've just got back from an early morning walk around Puerto Marino. The fact I am walking at all is an achievement for me; I detest it. When I am overweight, the last thing I want to do, is walk around in public; equally I would not choose to go to a gym, surrounded by body beautiful men or women. Part of the problem, when you are larger than you should be, is the lack of confidence you have. I don't mind admitting, I am very self conscious at times. I am under no illusions however; I know I have to exercise more.

Last night I was working at LoungeD, when one of our regular customers, Jim came in. We started talking about keeping fit, living in Gran Alacant. Jim forces himself to get out and walk everyday, no matter what he is doing. It is easy to fall into the Expat trap; sitting in bars, drinking cheap pints of beer and not moving too far; it is a local pastime for many. I can understand why, especially when you feel you are on holiday every day of your life. Most of those who live here are retired and deserve to enjoy their retirement as they wish. For me however, middle aged and unfit, I am concerned about my weight.

I have always had a weight problem and have yo yo dieted for years, losing weight as much as gaining in. I have gone from a size 26" to a size 44" waist in my life time and everything in-between. I can never lose just enough bulk to stay healthy, always going for extreme options, having suffered with eating disorders in the past. I am a person of bipolarity in all respects; never following the middle road; until today that is!

I have had enough of diet fads and extreme weight loss and gain; I know I need to follow a more positive, moderate path, in order to get healthy and of course lower my high blood pressure. I'm going to start off small, 30 or 40 minutes walking a day and gradually increase my fitness from there; even if I don't want to. Someone, much fitter than I, once told me, you are either a keep fit addict or not; admitting that they didn't always want to get up early and go for a run. I tend to agree with them, for me any exercise is a chore and not something that comes easy!

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At school, I was a 'fat' kid; no idea why, since my brother was the complete opposite. He was into sport, played football and cricket and generally did everything I didn't. I guess I got the raw end of the deal in the fitness department. When you are a bigger child, it does have an impact on your life. Being the last child to be picked, to join a team in physical education lessons, does leave a lasting legacy. At school I would do everything to avoid lessons; fake illness, bunk off or smoke behind the bike sheds; I hated it that much. Of course the more you hate something, the more anxiety you suffer, when confronted with your fear. in my case the more I would eat, just to make myself feel better. I would resort to munching, every time I felt uncomfortable or in a situation I didn't like.

Living in Spain I have began the process of renewal in all respects. At 46 years old, I have to start making some changes to  my lifestyle, if I want to live past the age of 50; I am all too aware of that. I have been testing my blood pressure all week and it is higher than it should be, at times significantly so; I have begun to make changes for my wellbeing. I no longer smoke at home; in fact the only time I have a cigarette, is when I am at work and that is no more than three. I understand I have to give up completely, that will come in time. I have also ditched unhealthy food, including my favourite cheese and chocolate, replacing them with nuts and fruit. So a few tentative steps towards my goal of healthy living; I'll do my best to keep it up and of course keep all of you updated!

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