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    France - A Place To Call Our Own!

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    I have always had a rather strange relationship with France; like many British people, I had a view of its people that wasn't entirely favourable. Of course, as individuals we all form stereotypical perspectives of cultures we don't understand; that has always been a British failing. As our nearest continental neighbour, France was my first experience of foreign travel, a place I visited frequently and a country I like to think I know well. In the late 1980s, along with my classmates, I travelled to the French city of Arras, our base for a week, while we toured the First World War battlefields. This was the beginning of a love/hate relationship that still lasts today. France is like Britain in so many ways, but its customs and traditions seem a world away from our own, making it a strange, alluring and intriguing place to visit.

    Between 2000 and 2004, Darrell and I lived in the beautiful village of Whiteparish, on the Hampshire/Wiltshire boarder, running a business twenty-four hours a day. Initially this was a particularly productive time for us, and we were able to do many things we hadn't done before. Despite the long hours, we managed to find the time to travel to France once a month, driving from our home in Salisbury, to Southampton or Portsmouth, crossing by ferry to Caen and other regional ports, stocking up on cigarettes and alcohol, as many Brits did back then. Both Darrell and I were heavy smokers and paying just £1 for a packet of twenty cigarettes was the draw both of us needed to continue making the journey to France each month. It wasn't too long, before both of us fell in love with this Country and started to make plans for our future.

    During our time traversing Northern France, we managed to investigate the local property market, discovering just how cheap it was to buy a home there and when the time was right, we bought a house direct from Hamiltons international Estate Agency, in the UK. During the early 2000s, foreign property was selling to British buyers fast and with our business taking priority, we decided to bite the bullet and buy a small country cottage without viewing it. Not something I would advise anyone else does, but these were different times, and we were determined to jump on the European property ladder, before prices rose too high.

    Le Coix, as the house was called, was situated in the beautiful, historic village of Le Lande St Simeon, near Fleurs in Swiss Normandy. This small stone structure was an empty shell, split in two, one half still used to keep animals and the other half for human habitation, although unused for many years.  Visiting our new French Petite Maison, I was struck by the sublime, charming countryside that surrounded the small hamlet  where our new house sat, detached, unfettered in half an acre of land. As the name 'Swiss Normandy' suggests, this was a region that looked and felt very much like Switzerland, the views were breathtaking and the feel distinctly relaxed and laid back. As we drove down the narrow country lanes into the village, I immediately felt de-stressed and nonchalant, breathing in the clean air, taking in the characterful surroundings, listening to the sound of silence.

    Both Darrell and I had big plans for this tiny chalet and were determined to restore it to its former glory, but time constraints and life took us in a very different direction. We no longer had the willpower or determination to finish the project and with the business taking more and more time, we left the property in the same state we bought it. Within six years we had sold our French dream as our sights became fixated elsewhere.

    Darrell and I have continued to travel to France when we are able - visiting Paris on a misty day in February, sat outside a chic café, overlooking the Eiffel Tower, drinking a cup of coffee and smoking a well-earned cigarette. The odd day here and there in Le Havre or taking my late Grandmother to Calais on Le Shuttle, was part of the course; so many times, we have travelled to our French neighbour, that it has almost become a part of our life together. The food, history, architecture and attitudes have always been a major incentive to return to this inspiring part of the World, again and again. Buying a property, also showed the negative aspects of French life - the red tape, corrupt officials and time-consuming stupidity that made our vision so much harder to achieve. However on the whole this is a welcoming place, that holds some special memories for us both; somewhere I will return to at any given opportunity.

    France was my first glimpse across the water, it was the appetizer that introduced me to the wider main course, spread across continents, oceans and time zones. My interest in travel stems from that first trip to Belgium and France, observing how differently our European cousins lived and just how necessary it is to have a broader sense of the wider World. My links to France through family and heritage, will always ensure a fondness that goes beyond my personal views and opinions. The door to Europe has become a catalyst for the journey I am on today, a small piece of familiarity in an ever shrinking globe!

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    Photographs of Hope - Family Toast!

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    Inspirational photographs at a time of crisis, creating positivity for the future!
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    It's been a week since our last family tribute, another Thursday toasting the importance of family during this pandemic and a tradition that has become a part of life for us all, during this difficult time. With lockdown rules relaxed further this week, all of us are continuing to rebuild our relationships with friends and relatives alike. On July 4th, more businesses will reopen and life as we know it now, will change yet again.  Until we get back to the way things were, we will continue to remember loved ones, every Thursday; a day to remember the importance of family life!

    We were delighted to be joined by my Mother-in-Law, Mary this week, at home with my husband Darrell in Perth, Western Australia. Mary continues to undergo a gruelling timetable of chemotherapy in order to treat her cancer diagnosis. It was wonderful to see her looking so well, despite her continued ordeal. All of us wish her well and are thankful for her good health.

    Stay Safe y'all!

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    Lockdown Life - Following The Rules!

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    I had a busy day on Thursday; the sun was out on the hottest day of the year so far and there wasn't a cloud in the sky! With 34 degree heat on the cards, I decided to go on my daily walk, even earlier than usual, arriving in Southsea at about 8.30am. There were still a few people about grabbing their spot on the beach for the day, but by and large it was a quiet scene, ideal for taking in the coastal scenery for a brief moment or two, before the crowds descended.

    Watching the news later in the day, I was horrified to see hundreds of thousands of people heading to popular tourist destinations like Bournemouth, ignoring social distancing measures and acting like Coronavirus had gone away. People, come on, what bloody planet are you on. This virus is still well and truly about and isn't going anywhere, yet you all continue to defy the regulations. I don't mind telling you all, that people are really getting me down. I am fed up with their ignorance and general lack of empathy for anyone but themselves.

    Having just got back from town myself this morning, walking to the city centre at 10am, just to pick up some supplies from Holland and Barrett, I was astounded by the number of people queuing just to get into Primark and other such stores. The line of people stretched around the block and no one was social distancing at all. This is awful and a disgusting indictment on the British public. Why the hell can't we just do as we are told?

    News headlines across the World were equally scathing about the scenes witnessed in Bournemouth and other beaches up and down the country. It felt like we were once again the laughingstock of the World, especially as our daily death rate was on the rise. On Thursday the fatality figure was 182, a ten-day high as the  figures from the previous two weeks began to filter down. This was of course no surprise for me, who already knew what was coming. The idiots on beaches, queuing to get into shops and not socially distancing are now causing real problems for our recovery from COVID-19 and with further relaxation measures coming into force on July 4th, it is likely these statistics will become even worse.

    I am really at a loss for words at how this Country, Government and population have dealt with this crisis. We have failed at so many levels and it is shocking to see. Nobody seems to care any more, most think the virus has gone away and there is a lack of understanding of its impact on people and communities up and down the land. I am not sure how bad things have to get, before people take notice!

    All of us are facing our own problems during this pandemic, so it was also nice to relax for a few hours in the company of family; following Government guidelines of course. The only people I see these days are close relatives and even then I keep my distance. It is difficult to really know just what we are allowed to do and what we aren't. There have been so many conflicting messages coming out of Downing Street, that many of us, don't know just what is acceptable and what isn't. This is part of the problem, there has been no cohesive messaging or comprehensive guidelines; the rules and regulations are complex and the public are rightly confused. Most people are now doing what they want and have just dismissed any involvement from the powers that be, due to their lack of leadership, misleading statements and failure to take responsibility for their actions!

    I am lucky to have family around me; all of us are doing our best to get through the challenges we now face. It is disheartening to see others flouting the rules, but what can we realistically do? It is now up to us as individuals to do the right thing for our own families. Our representatives have failed us as a nation, we have to take charge of our own destinies, even if it does go against what we are being told. When measures are relaxed, if I feel they are wrong, I will do what I can to keep myself safe. I will continue to stay two meters from others, will avoid large shopping malls and will always do all I can to protect others..... Can you really say the same?


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    Kuala Lumpur, City of Contrasts!

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    Darrell and I have been to Kuala Lumpur twice over the 24 years we have been together, firstly in 1997 and a second time in 2001. The difference between each visit couldn't have been more stark. In 1997, I was heading towards a new life in Australia with Darrell, and Malaysia was the ideal stop over on the way to Perth. I really had no idea what to expect when I arrived at the old KL Airport in the capital, but as this was my first foray into Asia, I was expecting some interesting sites and I wasn't disappointed.

    Kuala Lumpur is the capital of Malaysia, a metropolis rather like London, or any other large urban conurbation. In 1997 this emerging city was still in its infancy, growing precipitately, spreading outwards and upwards; construction was evident everywhere you looked. It had a rather gritty feel, infrastructure was old and antiquated, drains were left open and the smell was often stomach churning. There were very few pavements to walk on safely, and what footpaths existed were poorly constructed, uneven and hazardous; it was actually safer to walk on the roads.

    Looking around the city, whilst navigating the streets one was struck by the amount of building work taking place. Tall cranes littered the tropical skyline; from our hotel room at the Ming Court Hotel, I could see at least six within eye shot. I remember thinking to myself at the time, that this was going to be a city to rival Singapore or Hong Kong, and I was delighted to be visiting at the beginning of its journey towards maturity. At times, it did feel like I was staying in a third World country, but then that is what it was. Malaysia's capital was about to come of age and it was apparent in every direction!

    Kuala Lumpur, rather like the rest of the region is culturally diverse, the demographic was like nothing I had experienced before, consisting of Malay's, Chinese and Indians. I felt like I was in a melting pot of different customs and traditions, religions and heritage. The distinctiveness was particularly evident in the capital, but rather like central London, this multicultural mix seemed to work well. The eclectic nature of this vibrant and dynamic city was truly electric and made for one of the most memorable experiences of my life, which is probably why I returned again in 2001.

    By 2001 Darrell and I had settled in the UK, taking the opportunity to fly once again to our favourite Asian destination. We arrived at a large modern airport, unlike the older terminal we navigated in 1997. There were travellers as far as the eye could see, indicating a change in the trajectory followed by this country. Kuala Lumpur was a city that had metamorphosed, transformed for future generations to enjoy, confident and content with its new outlook, a shining jewel in the orient to rival any of the other metropolitan districts in the region. I was amazed by the change, something I had predicted four years prior.

    The underground, monorail and rapid transit system was by now complete and fully integrated into the architecture of Kuala Lumpur. New shopping centres, apartment buildings, highways and skyscrapers were scattered across the city. The Petronas Towers was fully operational, welcoming tourists from all corners of the World. The glass walk way linking the two monumental monoliths delivered amazing views across the skyline, and down below landscaped gardens, fountains and pools offered an escape from the intense searing heat. This was a region that had grown out of all proportion and was now a burgeoning destination of choice.

    I visited Kuala Lumpur briefly in 2019, stopping over after a flight from Cambodia. By now the airport was unrecognisable; twenty years of change and rebirth had turned this once tiny outpost in the far east, into a modern mega city, an asphalt jungle at the edge of rain forest, lush tropical scenery and extraordinary wildlife. I have been lucky enough to see just how much this once old colonial city with small imperial traditional buildings, nestled between contemporary modern glass superstructures, has evolved and advanced over time. In many ways I preferred the old fabric of the place, but modernity often overtakes convention in a race for change. This is a city I could quite happily settle in, living a life Darrell and I first dreamed of in 1997. In a future so uncertain today, this may well be our 'tomorrow' home on a bucket list of many; Kuala Lumpur is most certainly our Asian abode for now!

    Kuala Lumpur 1997
    Kuala Lumpur 2001
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    Lockdown Life - Restrictions Eased!

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    I was back out walking yesterday, for the first time in a week. Since going back to work and with the rain in constant flow, I haven't had as much time to do the things I would like. Nevertheless, I walked a healthy seven miles, down to the coast and back again, even though the sun barely peeped through the clouds.

    I haven't been in the best frame of mind recently as you all know, having come to the end of an awful two weeks holiday, when I should have been away in the far east. I have probably had too much time on my hands and spent rather a lot of time thinking. Like everyone else I just want this terrible time to be over. This week was the first time in a while, that I really felt depressed; that hasn't happened for a long time. I have had down periods, but this has been a struggle to conquer and I have done my best to block it out and just carry on as normal.

    I am finding people a strain; they are out in droves once again and ignoring Government guidelines, whilst the rest of us try to do the right thing. With lockdown measures eased dramatically, the country is getting back to some kind of normality. The trouble is, it isn't normal, and we are still in the middle of a pandemic, with deaths recorded in the hundreds and I fear things are going to get gradually worse again, unless people start taking notice of social distancing rules.

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    Last night I needed cheering up, so watched a film, I haven't seen since I lived in Spain, 'Beautiful Thing.' This amazing 'coming out' movie has great poignancy for Darrell and I, released just a year after we got together and always takes me back to our first few carefree years as a couple, before we began fighting for our right to remain in the UK as partners. Unless you are gay, you will really never understand the importance of 'coming out' to family and friends. Back in the early 1990s it was the biggest issue on my mind and really became the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the last thing I contemplated before I went to sleep.

    As I'm sure you are aware by now, I didn't have an easy time of declaring my homosexuality and as such found 'Beautiful Thing' comforting at a very difficult time. Of course all of us are experiencing anguish and anxiety today, for very different reasons and once again I watched a film that has got me through some dark days in the past; by the end of it, I felt suitably relaxed and content. It has always been important for me to feel secure and well-adjusted in my environment, wherever I am; I certainly haven't had a lot of security in recent years, so anything that gives me a lift is welcome; I have even spent the afternoon today, watching Jane McDonald, cruising around the World; a reminder of happier times!

    From watching retro television programmes, sorting through photographs, speaking to old friends on the telephone and writing about better moments in my life, I have done everything I can to feel comfortable during the last three months. For the most part, I did well, even surprising myself at times. I think all of us have to do what we can to get through the worst of the virus, all the while, remembering there are others worse off than us. With the easing of lockdown restrictions, it won't be too long before the most serious phase of this pandemic becomes a distant memory, and we all look forward to a new, untested future. We should however, never forget just what transpired in all our lives, after all we will all remember this period for generations to come, recalling events that made us the people we are today and hoping to god it never happens again!
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    Italy: Awe-Inspiring and Beautiful, a special place in my heart!

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    Travel remains the most important part of mine and Darrell's life. Despite our continued separation on different sides of the World, unable to leave our respective countries, because of the continued travel restrictions, we still have a passion for foreign climes that is unmatched. Up until recently I always looked forward to taking an annual holiday or two, visiting family in Croatia or meeting Darrell in Asia, while we both spent time with our nearest and dearest in different countries. This period is doubly isolating for both Darrell and I, because we are literally parted by circumstances beyond our control and at the first opportunity, we will be flying again, in order to pick up where we left off!

    Today I want to write about one of our favourite countries, a place we have visited four times and somewhere that holds a special place in my heart - Italy was my first love and will always be a country I return to when I can. The memories I have from time spent in this stunningly beautiful part of the Word, is at the forefront of my mind today, as I look through hundreds of photographs while on lockdown in the UK.

    Our first taste of Italy, in 2001 was a spontaneous break in Sorrento. During this period Darrell and I were running our own business, so getting away was difficult. We were lucky enough to get cover for a week and jetted off to Naples in the month of March.

    From the moment I arrived in Sorrento, I was captured by its elegance, falling in love with this magical region of Italy. Our typically Italian hotel sat at the top of a cliff overlooking the Mediterranean Sea, like so many others. The scenery was monumental and at times overwhelming. On one side jagged, rugged rock formations, waves lapping the spectacular shore line and on the other, lemon and orange groves, olive trees and sunkist mountains. I remember, sat on a wooden bench, just outside the hotel, looking across the ocean towards the Isle of Capri. The hot sun dancing off the waves, lighting a channel towards the horizon. I had never felt so relaxed in my life.

    During our time in Sorrento, Rome and Venice, the biggest draw for me was the culture and history that make up the country of Italy. A short train ride from Sorrento, sat the most famous volcano in the World, and at its base the ancient city of Pompeii. Trying to climb this famous mount was an expedition too far for me, managing to get half-way up, before turning around heading towards the bottom once again. Pompeii was an altogether easier task; walking through Roman streets, surrounded by two thousand year old buildings - Bakeries, brothels, civic and grand houses, narrow cobbled streets bearing the scars of the numerous chariots that would have driven along their length. I was in ore of the graffiti that decorated outside walls, documenting an election taking place at the time of the eruption, bodies of victims perfectly preserved in plaster and frescos adorning the inside rooms of noble stately chambers. This was an amazing place, that I have visited twice over the years, and somewhere I would dearly love to go again.

    Rome was equally tantalizing and breathtaking. The resplendent colosseum, formidable in nature, its historical relevance and imposing character unsurpassed. The forum, southern European architecture, The Pantheon, with its concrete Roman dome and preturnatural interior, richly embellished, situated discretely in the classical centre of the city. Each destination a reminder of our human roots and the beginning of a journey that would take Darrell and I the Vatican, situated in the heart of Rome itself. 

    The stupendous St Peters Basilica was awe-inspiring, bringing religion to life in the spiritual home of the Catholic Church. As someone who isn't particularly religious, even I was taken aback by the sheer size of the structure. As I walked into the Basilica with Darrell, I was overcome with emotion, feeling quite teary at one stage. The candles' illuminating the entrance to this sublime house of God, the faint smell of incense wafting through the echoey concourse and a statue of St Peter, where tourists and pilgrims alike had rubbed away the bronze on his foot, promoting good luck to everyone who passed by, was a reminder of the importance of this composition. Feeling speechless, enraptured, carried away in the moment, I was helped outside by an engaging Priest, who wished me well on my holiday. Looking back towards the facade of the basilica I remember thinking how disciples of the past must have felt as they entered the inner sanctum, a monument to man's achievement, refinement and artistic talents.

    Italian food, cooked beautifully is small family run ristoranti on the Piazza Tasso, views over the Spanish Steps and Trevi Fountain and washing strung between houses in narrow Roman backstreets. Urban life, so different to home, was vibrant and spirited, the sound of motor scooters in the morning zipping past our hotel bedroom, local market traders selling freshly caught fish and artists painting in local squares outside tiny churches hidden down dark dimly lit vicoli; all part of an atmosphere that still lingers on my senses, just like it was yesterday. Recollections that make Italy the most alluring, charming and prepossessing destination I have ever been to.

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