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    IBS Flare Up!

    Australia Ibs Weight Loss Health blog
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    I have a feeling, I'm not in a great place at the moment. Generally I am feeling pretty unwell — nothing specific, but just a feeling of constant malaise. I just can't put my finger on what is wrong, but I get like this from time to time. IBS has once again reared its ugly head and overtaken my life.

    I have suffered from this bloody condition for years; I have great periods when I am pain free, as well as deeply difficult days. I say days, but these flare-ups can last for months, and they really do knock me for six. It's just a feeling, but I think this is going to be a long one for me. I have already begun the process of eliminating certain foods, looking for suitable medication, and more importantly, trying to deal with this god awful thing once and for all.

    Being very bodily aware, I knew something was wrong a little over a week ago. I have been having real problems sleeping, so I bought some Magnesium Glycinate to help. I have never tried this stuff before, but after reading about it, it appeared on paper at least, to be just what I was looking for. Surviving on just a few hours sleep each night, even though I am using Melatonin, has been debilitating. I am still waking up at 3am every morning, unable to get back to sleep. This form of magnesium is highly recommended for an insomniac like me, but it just hasn't agreed with my IBS and I have been left doubled over in pain.

    Today I awoke at 2.30am and have been awake ever since. For this reason I wasn't even going to blog today, but I felt I had to, just to get some feelings off my chest. A few days after taking the magnesium supplement, I have feeling terrible. My body literally feels like it is shutting down. I have severe abdominal cramps, pain under my left rib, nausea and terrible backache. I have felt this bad before, but not for a long time. As someone who suffers from health anxiety, I have been googling, trying to find answers, to my current state of health and this has just made me feel so much worse.

    From kidney failure, gastritis and pancreatitis, to cancer, I have died multiple times this week, as I try to find out why I am feeling so bad. I am sure deep down this is IBS, but as ever, something is telling me to delve deeper, nothing is quite as it seems.

    One of the biggest problems with IBS, is the inability to believe that the pain you are suffering from isn't causing physical damage to your organs. The discomfort is that bad at times, you feel like you are dying. I have had every test going over the years, yet Doctors have found nothing. I am just left with a nondescript, vague diagnosis of IBS and told to get on with my life, no matter how hard that is.

    This week I have been tired, fatigued, in tremendous pain, and in a very bad place mentally. IBS isn't psychosomatic as many would believe, it is a real, debilitating, agonising diagnosis that never gives up. Unlike other illnesses, IBS has no cure or end date. There isn't even a test to tell you, you have it. The whole diagnosis is based on a process of elimination. When everything else is ruled out, including the more sinister diseases, you are finally given your IBS label. This is a tag you live with for the rest of your life. You have good days and bad days, but when they are bad, they are the worst — nothing compares to IBS pain, and you never truly learn to live with it.

    With this terrible week at an end, I am able to lay here on the sofa, with a water bottle on my belly, writing my thoughts down. The best medicine for me is the ability to share my musings with you. The release I feel as I write is unbelievably healing, and I am just grateful to be able to do it. 

    If you suffer from IBS, like me, you'll understand my pain, and if you ever need a chat, just drop me a message, I'm always here. Chatting about this condition with people who understand the symptoms, is a lifeline at times of great stress. Nobody, including my husband, really understands just what I am going through and for that reason, my writing has become a catalyst for getting well. My ability to blog is a tonic at times when I need it most — without it, I would feel even more alone than I do today. 

    ​IBS encompasses so many disorders and defects, that it becomes an almost impossible problem to solve. Failure is my biggest enemy, so as I battle this dreaded indisposition, I am reminded about the time before I was diagnosed and the happy, carefree World that I used to inhabit. This is the marker I need to push me ever onwards, towards a cure, and the ability to exist comfortably, without pain. This is the goal I am determined to achieve, to finally live stress and pain free, and be happy again like I used to, in a time before IBS!
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    Reflections, Three Years On!

    Australia Milestones Osaka And Kyoto 2026 blog
    I haven't composed a written blog in a while, so I've decided to put pen to paper, as it were, and write a few words today. Enjoying a long weekend, does afford me the opportunity to sit and think about what to say. I suppose you could call today's blog, 'non-specific', because today I am writing down, what ever comes to mind — off the cuff comments about my life in Australia, and just how I'm feeling this weekend.

    Darrell and I have been in Australia for a little over three years now and have achieved a lot during our time in Perth. More than anything, we are lucky enough to have been able to buy a house, at a time when Australia is suffering from a housing crisis, worse than anything in The UK. Recently, I was told in no uncertain terms, that in all probability, I wouldn't be able to buy a house in Perth today, and it's easy to see why.

    Prices are out of control in this isolated part of the world. Since COVID-19, the lack of housing has become a crisis. Perth itself has the most expensive rental market in the whole country, and prices are rising faster than inflation. A house like ours would let easily for $600 a week, and I just can't imagine how anyone can afford to rent a property here, let alone buy one.

    Since buying our current home, the value has more than doubled and continues to rise daily. I remember when we first moved here, applying for flats to rent, joining long queues of people waiting to view this property or that, and thinking to myself, what a mistake we had made moving to Australia. Thankfully, we didn't have to rent, and after speaking to our amazing Bank Manager, we were more than able to afford to buy a three-bedroom villa, near to Darrell's Mum.

    Of course, I have filled our house with lots of stuff, as you would expect from a maximalist like me, and it feels very much like a home now. We haven't done much to this place since moving in, preferring instead to spend our money on travelling. Look, I would love to have a perfectly polished home, but at my age, I believe it is more important to enjoy life, and use our house in Western Australia as a base. The villa is large by British standards, functional, and offers us all the space we need. Darrell has one side of the house and I have the other, which works out fantastically well for us.

    Despite being settled and secure, we continue to regard travel as our number one priority. Living in Australia can of course make this rather challenging, especially when you live in Perth. However, we are spending our time travelling through Asia, which just happens to be our favourite part of the World. To date we have seen most countries in the region, and will be exploring Japan early next year. Eventually we would like to travel further afield, but as a nervous flyer, I would rather stay within a 5 or six hour flight limit. Japan is certainly a longer journey than this, but it is a destination on both our bucket lists, that we need to see before we get too old.

    In 2027, I plan to fly back to the UK to see my Father and possibly attend my 40th school reunion. This will give me an opportunity to catch up with friends and family also, and hopefully stop off in Europe along the way. It is true to say I miss my country of birth, but I really miss Europe even more. Having lived in Spain for several years, I understand the European way of life and crave the lifestyle it offers.

    Australia is so far from the rest of the World, that at times it feels like a whole different planet. Despite our two countries English roots, we are poles apart in every other respect. Australians are very insular people and not as welcoming as the British, or indeed the Expat community in Spain. Darrell and I do feel extremely lonely at times and look back to our days living in Southampton, Portsmouth, and Gran Alacant with fondness. Someone once asked me if I loved Australia; after thinking about it for a minute, I had to say no! I like this country for everything it has done for me and the opportunities it has given both of us, but I hate the loneliness and the deep sense of loss I feel.

    If circumstances had been different, Darrell and I wouldn't be here. We would still be happily (or not) living in Britain, surrounded by friends and family. I'm not sure our lives would be as comfortable as they are now, but we would have a large network of contacts around us. As I grow older, I find people more important, and I wish we had a wider circle of friends. It is difficult for outsiders to make strong connections here, especially at 55 years old. As a wise Australian once confirmed, Aussies make their friends in high school and tend not to deviate from that group. When two older gay men arrive from Europe, with little or no support, then life is going to be tough —certainly tougher than it would have been, had we stayed in Britain.

    ​As Darrell and I look forward to a new adventure in May, travelling to Osaka and Kyoto, we are both aware of just how far we have come in such a short space of time. Naturally we are grateful to Australia for all it has given us, as we navigate this new life down under, but we are also regretful for everyone we have left behind. I miss my Father every day and always look forward to hearing from friends back home. I am sad we don't have a satisfying lifestyle here, but I hope, even now, given time, that will change. In the meantime, both of us will continue to strive for a better and more productive future. Keeping our hopes and dreams alive, at a time when we need them most, is important — we obviously have each other, Mum, and a few close friends. These are quite simply the people who matter, everything else takes second place.
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    Clayborne in Thailand and Singapore 2025!

    Claybornes World blog
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    Clayborne has been travelling all over the World for six years now and despite his advancing age, he is still very much a part of our travelling abroad. His head is rather wobbly, fur matted and worn, but like us, he keeps going, spreading the message for Cancer Research UK, where it all began in 2019!

    ​Here he is on his latest trip to Singapore and Thailand last month. As ever, I would like to ask my readers to make a donation to Cancer Research UK. This is a charity I worked for and one I continue to support, despite now living in Australia. Please click on Claybornes paw to danate!
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    Please click my paw to donate to Cancer Research UK!

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    Day 12 - Return to Oz!

    30th Anniversary Thailand And Singapore 2025 Travel blog
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    As is usual with a holiday, our final day consisted of travelling, shopping, and eating airline food. With me still taking antibiotics, there was of course no alcohol, but I was determined to enjoy our day at Changi Airport. 

    Checkout from the Furama Riverfront was at midday, but with Changi Airport being probably the best airport in the World, and our flight not leaving until 7pm, we decided to leave earlier.  Changi has many facilities and experiences to enjoy, so because we had so much time to kill, we made the most of our opportunity. This is an airport that Singaporeans use all the time, even when not taking a flight. Every weekend the place fills with locals, just wanting to relax, shop and enjoy everything this amazing place has to offer.

    The Furama was the ideal hotel for our stay and explore Singapore. It was centrally located and only a two-minute walk from the MRT station. This hotel was pretty dated in places, and the room certainly wasn't up to the high standards of the Aira Hotel in Bangkok, but it was superior in many respects. The bed was the best we had slept in; neither of us suffered with back problems here, unlike the two previous places. The room had a bath and shower and more importantly, the water was piping hot. Also, out of all the hotels we stayed in, The Furama served the best breakfast, with a huge choice of local and western cuisine on the buffet menu. 

    Unfortunately, the lifts were terrible, and I did find myself going up and down in them for ten or fifteen minutes at a time, as our electronic key card failed to register our floor. There were also a lot of children about, as it was school holidays, which didn't make for the most relaxing experience ever. Nevertheless, the pros outweighed the cons, and yes, I would stay at The Furama again for sure.
    It took half an hour to get to the airport, at a cost of S$30.00. On arrival, we checked in and dropped off our bags within twenty minutes. It was a dream navigating the modern, vast, terminal 3, and without our luggage we were free to roam as much as we pleased. The Singapore Airlines representative who helped us with our check in, directed us towards the famous Jewel, within this vast complex, and after a quick coffee at Starbucks we made our way there.

    The Jewel consists of a large waterfall with vortex at the bottom, along with what I can only describe as an indoor rainforest, surrounded by a ginormous shopping centre and restaurants. Unless you actually go there yourself, you just have no idea how spectacular this venue is. The scenery is breathtaking and the waterfall awesome. I just stood there dumbfounded at how this place was even constructed — it was a site to behold.
    We spent a good hour at The Jewel, before navigating our way towards departures for a long five-hour wait for the flight. This wasn't too much of a problem for me, since there was so much to do. After a Burger King lunch, (not my idea, Darrell wanted something western before the long flight) we took the monorail to terminal 1 and 2, to take a look at the shops. There are of course a lot of stores, and surprisingly, most of them are competitively priced, unless of course, you are looking for designer bands.

    I am definitely not a label person, and would rather waste my money on souvenirs, not expensive clothes and jewellery. If you want that experience, however, there are plenty of designer shops to choose from. Airports always promote rampant consumerism, so even I bought some Jean Paul Gaultier aftershave from the duty-free shop. That was it, mind you. After shopping for ten days in Asia, I was all shopped out. Darrell, however, was spending more money than ever, looking for various Asian toys and memorabilia to take home with him.

    To be honest, I think we both love the Asian way of life. Part of the charm of holidaying in this part of the World, is the enjoyment of cultural experiences. Heritage and history aside, there are plenty of plastic toys, and kitsch retro memorabilia to enjoy as well. Society, customs, and traditions in this part of the World are so different to the west, that both of us are enthralled and captivated by its gentle, often juvenile nature. Even at 55 years old (nearly) I love Hello Kitty, manga and the almost strange vending machine culture that exists in abundance.

    ​Changi Airport is full to bursting with the most colourful, gaudy and childlike items and is a joy to walk around. Both of us did buy some of the tackiest items we could find, to add to our collection, but why wouldn't you. We are only in Asia once or twice a year, so bringing choice objects home is just part of the course.
    By the time 7 pm came, we were both particularly tired and ready for the four and a half hour flight home. We flew on an Airbus, unlike the Boeing that took us to Singapore twelve days before, and you could immediately tell the difference. There was noticeably less legroom and the whole experience felt cramped and stressful, compared to the first flight we arrived on. 

    With Darrell watching the inflight entertainment, I sat happily chatting with an Australian gentleman, living in Indonesia. His name was Cathcart and like me was very politically aware. We chatted contentedly for the duration of the flight, covering every topic, from politics, religion, travel and gay rights. Cathcart wasn't gay, but as a left wing, Green party activist, he was aware of the difficulties both Darrell and I had gone through over the years. He was knowledgeable, full of advice and made the flight a hell of a lot easier to deal with.

    The flight itself was a little turbulent at times, and I did feel rather ill on occasion, as the plane jostled from side to side. Cathcart was also physically sick. This was unusual for him, since he was used to flying regularly, unlike me, but this is how bad the return journey home was. This was one of the worst flights I had ever been on, and I am thankful we arrived in once piece. Apart from that, I thoroughly enjoyed flying with Singapore Airlines, it was an almost perfect experience.
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    Our 30th Anniversary trip was exhausting. Once again, we saw things we could have only dreamt of before now. We visited new places in Bangkok, which is always a wonderful experience. Bangkok, of course, always remains my city destination of choice. It isn't as polished as Singapore, but it is far more down to earth, a bit gritty and always an enjoyable place to stay. 

    Thai people also remain the most welcoming in the World. Darrell and I have always enjoyed the hospitality in Thailand and just can't fault anything about the city or people who live there. If I had my way, I would move there at the drop of a hat, it gives me a warm feeling inside, and is perfect in every respect.

    Singapore was a very different adventure. The cleanliness, organisation and polished exterior was a joy, and I did feel safe staying there. However, the city is full of designer shops and appears at times to only cater for the richest people in society. After staying there for four days, I had, had enough of the glitz and glamour and was ready to go home.

    We did nevertheless fall in love with China Town. This historic quarter gave us a more authentic Asian experience. The people who live and work here were far more honest and approachable. Situated in the older part of the city, it was more characterful and attractive to look at, and thankfully there wasn't a designer shop in sight. This was the real part of Asia I wanted to see. You can keep the tall glass buildings, imposing skyscrapers and pristine streets.

    I would of course return to Bangkok tomorrow, but I'm not too sure about Singapore. I would like to stay there again, for its sheer ease of stay. It is quick and easy to get to and only a short distance from the airport. The underground is uncrowded and very simple to use, and it makes for a very convenient location to stay. As a stopover it is perfect, staying beyond four days would, however, be pushing it a little, but as a short break, I would go back.

    This was a holiday about reliving old experiences and remembering our 30 years together. Bangkok is my favourite city — Singapore Darrell's — this was the best of both worlds for us. It was an exhausting trip and as we look forward to our next holiday, our advancing years, dictate a more relaxed break, with far less travelling. No matter what we do in the future, we are grateful for the memories we made, the people we met and of course the quality time we had together. After our 30 years together, in our favourite part of the World, we couldn't have asked for a more enjoyable time!
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