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I would like to thank all those that emailed me yesterday, after my article about Oxfam. I have had correspodence from staff and volunteers, from my old region and further afield; all of them have a common theme; what can be done about this charity and the abuses they have carried out?
I am a little short of time today, but will follow up this post as soon as I am able, featuring some of the messages I have received. What I want to say now is this:
If you are experiencing bullying or abuse or have a complaint to make about Oxfam, as your employer, you need to follow the statutory procedure. In my situation, because the bully was my boss, I went directly to HR. Also contact www.unitetheunion.org/, if you are a member. They were pretty useless in my case, but it is always good to have this course of action on record. Even if you are not employed by Oxfam, but want your voice to be heard, I would contact the Board of Trustees, customer service at Oxfam House, Cowley, Oxfordshire or the Charity Commission, details of which can be found in the 'Links' section of 'Spanish Views.'
There are many people out there, including ex colleagues who are still suffering at the hands of VERONICA RAYMOND. I am aware Oxfam read this blog and would like to say once again, do the decent thing and deal with the horrendous injustices perpetrated by this person. You have caused a lot of pain, to so many people, it is time you held your hands up and took responsibility for your actions!
I am not going away and will always keep up the pressure on Oxfam, you should to!
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I had an email yesterday from an ex volunteer, who I used to work with in Southampton. I often hear from volunteers, after eight years working with this wonderful bunch of selfless individuals, you form close bonds, It is always good to hear how everyone is getting on and how the shop I used to look after is performing. Oxfam, London Road, Southampton, was what I would call a community shop; it was the hub of the local area and we organised many community events for charity. The volunteers were special people, as were our customers, who would return time after time.
Somewhere along the way, Oxfam lost its vision, exactly what it was supposed to represent;
Empowerment
Our approach means that everyone involved with Oxfam, from our staff and supporters to people living in poverty, should feel they can make change happen.
Accountability
Our purpose-driven, results-focused approach means we take responsibility for our actions and hold ourselves accountable. We believe that others should also be held accountable for their actions.
Inclusiveness
We are open to everyone and embrace diversity. We believe everyone has a contribution to make, regardless of visible and invisible differences.
The three goals above were the foundation on which Oxfam was built, at least when I began my career with them in 2008. By the time I left in 2015, they had broken everyone of these values. Oxfam's focus became distracted by a new CEO, Mark Goldring, who was taking this once great charity down a path that was unsustainable, ripping up the rule book, treating his core group of supporters with disdain. Fundamentally Oxfam stood for 'Making Poverty History;' one vocal employee at Oxfam House, the Head Office of this organisation, spoke to me off the record;'None of us truly believe, or want to make poverty history; if we did, how would we pay our mortgages. Oxford is a very expensive place to live. All of us have to survive, one way or another, whether you live in Africa or not!'
I remember feeling sick to my stomach at this statement; 'Making Poverty History,' was just a front, to make those who gave their time and money, continue believing in the work Oxfam do. Deeply disturbing voices were common place within this trust; corruption was rife!
The news I heard yesterday was very different to that of the past. The shop I used to Manage is being shut down after a decade and a half of trading. Many of those who volunteer in this little bookshop have been there since its conception. Oxfam are losing a vital place on the high street, a presence that these shops need, in order for the charity to survive long term.
I have of course heard from other friends and volunteers, just how bad the shop was doing since I left and all because of an Area Manager, who is continuing to sabotage the region she works for. Veronica Raymond employed someone who didn't know how to run or manage a shop, especially one centered around a volunteer work force. On the surface it looked like she had made another bad management decision, but having suffered at her hand in the past myself, I knew what she was up too. Veronica had always wanted to close this shop and she ran it into the ground, with the help of Oxfam and a Manager who had no idea what she was doing.'Santi, was a total disaster as far as I was concerned. She knew nothing about books, she didn't know how to manage, alienated a lot of the volunteers'
The new Manager Santi, interestingly was Spanish; according to the email I received, she alienated volunteers, good people who gave up their time free and gratis, leaving this once fantastic shop unable to function properly. Santi is no longer there; having caused the irreparable damage, she is now back in Spain, working in a well paid job. The way dedicated volunteers have been treated is beyond a joke, Oxfam has much to answer for; discarding decent people, simply because someone can't deal with the issues surrounding a voluntary work force is a terrible injustice. Closing down a shop that was hugely profitable before a substandard manager took control shows much about those who employed Santi, their judgement and reasoning. Take a good look at yourselves; you are not doing good things for Oxfam you are destroying lives, communities, volunteers and everything Oxfam stands for.
Oxfam Charity Literary Evening in 2009; happier times!
After hearing the sad news, that Oxfam Books is to close next month, I wanted to pay my own tribute to those who worked at this shop. Volunteers are the bulk of the workforce within all charities and sadly recognised the least. I am truly grateful for being given the opportunity of working with some fantastic characters, who taught me much, all of whom I miss everyday.
I want to say a special few word for just a few of those I worked along side, who helped us build a successful charitable enterprise.
Mavis - A true lady, who has volunteered at Oxfam for about twenty years. Mavis is in her late eighties now. Always welcoming and accepting, she was a true pillar of strength, especially during the early years, when I had just started on my journey, as a new Manager.
David - Our oldest volunteer; well into his nineties as I write this. A true gentleman who did much to help raise money for Oxfam. David would cycle to work everyday, rain or shine, keeping as fit and active as he could.
Cynthia - Left Oxfam many years ago, but spent a long period as my right hand woman, showing me the ropes. Cynthia became a personal friend and I was sad to see her emigrate to Antigua; I hope life is treating you well!
Brenda - Brenda was an ex teacher and concentrated her efforts, around children's books, her passion. Brenda and I always had a lot of banter between us. I did wind her up on many occasions; despite this I loved being in her company; a true stalwart.
Ian - A gentle giant, who I did my best to empower, lifting him up at a difficult time in his life. Ian had a heart of gold and was always there to help. I haven't seen him for four years or more now and hope life is finally taking him in the right direction.
Denise - I keep in contact with Denise as often as I can; she was an invaluable member of the team. Like me, she wasn't treated with the respect she deserved by those in charge but I know, she is finally happy working for a charity who appreciate her skills.
Felicity - Finally, Felicity, the first member of my team I really got to know; she started approximately the same time as me and was always a joy to be around. Felicity had her ways about her, and god help anyone who got in her way. A strong character, I built up an enduring rapport with; a friendship I hope to keep for a very long time. When I pop back to Southampton, I'll be round for a coffee, you can be sure of that.
To everyone else, all of you I worked with in my time; good luck for the future, maybe one day I'll see you all again. Keep up the good work wherever you are, whoever you volunteer for and understand I will always be appreciative of all you did to help me, as Manager of Oxfam London Road; we had some memorable times, didn't we!
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Today I wanted to talk about the very first blog entry I wrote in April of 2015. My first blog Bipolarcoaster documents a very different time in my life. It has been difficult for me to read this entry today, going back over old ground, seeing just how ill I was at the time; I haven't reread any of my blogs, this is the first. Much has changed since these words were written, least of all me; the beginning is always a good place to start; this is where it all began. The entry is entitled Recovery and can be read below!
Recovery
8/4/2015
Today, I am recovering from a serious Bipolar Relapse. After giving up medication 8 months ago, and another attempt at suicide, I thought it was the only option I had available to me. I wrote on facebook six months ago:
Happiness
Not had a lot of the Happy, nice and uplifting stuff recently. Not gonna go over the reasons why, since I've written about sh*t times enough in my life and most of you know the reasons why. A streamlined facebook, that's the biggest clue!
I've had a lot of bipolar highs. Was that true happiness? NO, not really. Just compensation for the lack of true feelings of joy. This is different! Bipolar makes it difficult to control emotions, so for many we stay emotionless. It's easier that way. No body wants to express the wrong emotion at the wrong time. I don't really want abuse or a punch. Well this old mental Queen is now dealing with real feelings, something I could have never done on medication. Apart from self monitoring my condition, there really isn't anything else I need to do.
Giving up meds six months ago was the first step. I could see, hear and smell things, I had long forgotten. The dreadful withdrawal symptoms were worth it, all of it. My relationship was rocky and volatile for a long time. Self medication, bad choices and rotten people, just some of the reasons why. I truly believed shed loads of pills were helping, like f*ck were they. They made everything worse. They masked reality and yes they made me vulnerable. Darrell left me on numerous occasions and for the first time my relationship became violent.
I changed the way I lived life and dealt with issues. I listened to the professionals and did not react as I had done, so many times before. It wasn't until Christmas, that I finally realised, I had changed. I was no longer the person I was. I felt strong. Strong enough to remove destructive influences and just think about myself and Darrell, who I have loved and continue to love after 20 years.
Positivity. That's always been a hard thing for me, but I am finding true optimism returning, more and more. Of course, I am not solely responsible for that. Having people around one, who care and truly, genuinely, without reservation help and encourage myself and Darrell has been the biggest factor in attaining a sense of self worth and belonging. These people were always the ones who were good for me, It's just now, I can actually see it and cherish their friendships, without pushing them away or demanding more and more, like a petulant child! Making the correct choices and believing in them, is the biggest motivation for my current state of mind. Seeing what people were becoming and the consequences to come, scared me so much that it gave me the strength to remove, what I thought were real friendships. I had to! I've
never done something because I had to. I was always reckless and only thought about myself. Bugger what may happen. I was going to do what I want, even if it meant loosing my partner and at its worse, my life. Not any more, not on your life, not ever, f*cking, ever again. The important things, people, aspirations and a future were back, and I am not letting them go again!
Marriage! Something I never thought I would be able to do in my life time. I am from the last generation, who truly felt the issues around discrimination and now, the world changed, while I was getting off it or high on such a huge dose of medication to mask the true meaning of my life. Someone started a revolution and I can finally feel free. Free to be gay, free to fall in love, free to get married. This is the most import thing in my life now. I am sure Darrell agrees. We can now be legal and the people we were born to be. To be able to express ones love for one another, in front of people we adore and respect, for many different reasons, really makes one feel emotional. It's kinda, like the end of a really rocky road. Well, not really the end, the new positive me would say the beginning of the rest of our lives together. I am truly happy many of you will be with us on 22 September, 20 years to the day our unconventional relationship began.
It's good to know, that those who will share our day, will be there because friendship overcame my fears, illogical thinking, easily lead mind and abnormal behaviour. I am still building bridges. Sound foundations and past history are allowing me to
embrace, what I once lost. I am not, nor ever will be perfect, but with all your support, I know Darrell and I will make it and this emotionless bitch would have finally found a heart and the courage to say I'm sorry.
This was two months ago. I was full of optimism for the future and happy with those around me. What a difference a few months made.
I should have never come off medication. Yes it felt good at the time, but in reality it masked the truth. My Bipolar has to be medicated, for my entire life. I should have relapsed within 3 months, I didn't, well maybe I did and I didn't know it. I have endured a campaign of harassment and bullying, from someone who I regarded as a friend, almost family. I was given more and more responsibility at work and I was coping with too much. The final nail came as I spoke up for myself, in front of someone who was victimising me, for daring to speak the truth. Sadly, it was one step too far.
I collapsed, physically and mentally. I knew the good times were finally up. My Bipolar reached Manic levels and with the threat of suicide again, my partner phoned the Police. I was put in a Police cell and had reached the bottom of a great 8 months.
Finally I was told the facts. Currently I am sedated for most of the day and await a final, new diagnosis, including possible ADHD, unheard of in my day, running along side Bipolar and whatever other Mental disabilities I may have. They are vast and many I'm sure. Today I hope to return to work and am positive about the future. Tonight my sedatives have been doubled and I have no idea how I will feel in the morning. I still have hope, there will be a few good friends left and the unconditional love of my long suffering partner, who I adore as much today, as I ever have done!The reasoning behind, why I was suffering, back in April of 2015 was deeply flawed. I was of course looking for answers, as to why I was so ill; the reality of my situation unknown to me at that time. I was grasping at straws, using a medical diagnosis as the answer, as to why things were bad. Bipolar played no part in my state of mind really, it was merely a catalyst for some rather dubious characters to take advantage of me and my situation. Of course the pain I was going through was very real, but as I know now, that discomfort was brought about by the very people who should have been there for me; work, my manager, Veronica Raymond and other colleagues, who were just pawns in a very dangerous game.
This first entry shows just what happens when you are bullied and don't know it. The stark truth is, I never understood what was going on at work, during the last few years working for Oxfam. They were covering up so much corruption within their ranks, including protecting those responsible for systematic abuse, that I was unable to see clearly through their deception. What happened to me in Easter 2015 was akin to ABH and worse; my life was being taken away from me, by a small core group of people, working for the Worlds biggest charity. My only saving grace was the friends I had around, who were doing their best to help me through this darkest period in my life.
Many of those who were there for me then are not now. Moving to Spain has caused a physical barrier between friendships, but more than that, I made a conscious decision to block people out of my life, for reasons of shame and mistrust. Those closest, saw me in some dreadful states; I am ashamed to admit, I fell as low as I did. All this Oxfam were responsible for; they inflicted a rabble of bullies on me and I suffered terrible consequences. Often those most vulnerable, as I was at the time, endure the most torment, while their perpetrators get away with their crimes. Oxfam have thus far gone unpunished, but nothing is forever!
Today I am living in Spain, having moved here to try and get away from a past so soiled by Oxfam. I truly believed Bipolar was responsible for my wellbeing; I was mistaken. In this entry I spoke about how wrong I was to stop taking my medication and how I should have been medicated forever, once again this was incorrect. Bipolar was the catalyst for others to take advantage of a vulnerable persons condition; namely me as I was at the time, but the suffering and agony I experienced, was not because of bipolar, it was because of intense bullying and mistreatment.
This entry from 8 April 2015 documents an horrific time in my life. After a breakdown I was sedated because of what I could have done to myself. I don't remember much about this period and it is only today, nearly three years later, that I am able to read this and other entries. The worst thing for me to come to terms with, as I reads this, is that I was unaware Oxfam were responsible for my then condition. I believed for many months afterwards that Oxfam were helping and supporting me, when all the time, they were making me worse. In time I would find out the truth and my situation would explode, beyond all comprehension, but that's for another day. At this point, I would like to thank all those who helped me through this difficult period in 2015, especially Jay Greaves and Natalee Michelle, two people I couldn't have survived without. I am lucky enough to have Natalee with me in Spain, which is a comfort. Sadly I don't speak to Jay anymore, but would hope to do so one day. He was a true pillar of support and a special part of my life.
Spain has given me a new lease of life and sense of purpose, as I navigate my way around a new country, career and opportunities. It has been bloody difficult at times, but today I am in a fantastic place, enjoying life, writing for a magazine, blogging everyday, running a bar in Gran Alacant and still helping others who have suffered at the hands of sociopaths, who could ask for more. The best way to recover from bullying, an attack by a sociopath and real trauma is to change your life for good, get out of the situation you find yourself in, don't look back and move as far away as possible, exactly what my partner and I have done. This blog entry serves as a reminder, to do better next time, choose friends wisely, recognise the signs of bullying and don't invite anyone into your life, without first doing your homework! Remembering is the first sign of recovery, forgetting is the last!
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I had a message from an avid reader of my blog, Bipolarcoaster yesterday; they had been reading about Verruca Almond, the first in a series of parodies, I had written about my ex boss, bully and sociopath, Vera Lynham. This was the woman, who I reported to on a daily basis, the person who I trusted and someone I looked up to, She had worked for Oxfam for about fifteen years and is still there today, in the same region I used to work for. By all accounts she is still up to her old tricks, bullying her way through peoples lives, left unchecked and confirmed in situ by the charity I used to work for.
Verruca Almond first appeared in my blog, Bipolarcoaster, on 20 July 2015, a little over two years ago now. I had recently found out that Vera was a sociopath, or to give it its medical term, she suffered from 'Anti Social Personality Disorder;' I needed a way of expressing my feelings about this person, who I had worked for, for five plus years, choosing to write a parody, referencing her role in my life, not as my employer, but as a carer, teaching me her sociopathic ways, helping me through a difficult time in my life. Of course Verruca, like my Manager wasn't helping me at all, nothing could be further from the truth.who is vera?
In order to understand Verruca, one first has to understand Vera, so I will try and explain what I know about her, through conversations with those who knew and worked with her, including her superiors and colleagues; as well as my own experiences.
Vera became my Area Manager in 2009, replacing a man I had always admired, someone who had helped me much during my time at Oxfam. At first I believed she was okay; she was friendly, personable and always fun to be around, at least to begin with. She had been moved from another region, for reasons none of us who worked in the South West, fully understood. Vera used to manage an area in West London, moving down south for dubious reasons, the truth covered up, buried, hidden away. She had always been a bully and was constantly moved from area to area, as her deviant nature became known and other victims stood up to her.
I was attending a 'New Products' meeting at Oxfam House, shortly after she had been installed as our new Commander in Chief, when her name first came up in conversation. I was sat on a table with other colleagues; all of us were discussing our jobs and managers, as part of an introduction, a team building process, as they call it. As soon as I mentioned my Manager, I was immediately confronted by sad, almost sorrowful faces. A lady took me to one side, someone who used to work with her and quietly gave me some advice. I was told to be very careful of her, she wasn't a nice person and I should watch my back.
I was a little confused at the time. Vera was great, she was doing what she could to help me and my career. She reminded me of Mary Poppins, very quietly spoken and always there offering advice; she did feel more like a friend, than an employer. At the time I dismissed comments made by others as just personal grudges from people who were jealous of her success; I didn't recognise this woman they were describing to me.
Vera reminded me of Lady Campanula Tottingham, the cartoon character from Wallace and Gromit, certainly in looks.
I had no reason to doubt her sincerity but then as I am frequently informed, I am a terrible judge of character; this woman was just another terrible person from a long list of bad people in my life, but she was more than that, she really was a deviant individual, working right at the heart of Oxfam. All along I should have been walking away from her, not being drawn in to her web of deceit.
Eventually, I began to realise who she really was, but just couldn't bring myself to quite believe it. Vera Lynham had given me the responsibility of interviewing new Managers with her, helping to employ many. On one occasion, we had to travel to my old home town of Fareham, sitting in a cafe in the shopping centre preparing questions, when she asked for my opinion on a position that had just arose in the area, that of mentor for new Managers. Three people had applied for the position; Dan and Hayley from Hythe and Petula from our Romsey shop; she asked me who I would choose. Immediately I mentioned Hayley; I had heard good reports about her and thought she would be perfect for the job. As soon as I communicated her name, Vera looked up from her notes, scowling at me. 'I would never employ her, she has too many issues, that rule her out. Not even in the running!' I was so shocked at how she spoke about a colleague, stopping all discussion in its tracks, informing me of sensitive information, that I certainly can't print on my blog. As I know now, these two feisty women were at logger heads, constantly, battling one another, working against each other, trying to ruin reputations. These two were very similar individuals; it was likely they were both sociopathic in their behaviour.
As I became ill, through the negligence of Oxfam and growing attacks by Vera, I was signed off work. I was persuaded to take action against Mrs Lynham by Head Office and of course Hayley, who helped myself and my partner draft a series of complaints against this woman, speaking up on our behalf when she could. Hayley was put in place to help me and Darrell, because she was a thorn in Vera's side, a person who was her equal and match and like her had no morals when trying to destroy another person. They both had no conscience, they were both sociopaths, used by Oxfam to try and discredit each other, in order to remove Vera from the organisation she worked for; after all the only match for a sociopath is another sociopath. At the time I found it all very odd, confusing behaviour; today I can understand why everything happened as it did.
The photograph above is a depiction of Vera, as I saw her in my dreams. When I became aware of who or rather what she was, I frequently experienced nightmares and still do to some extent, This 'BLOODY WOMAN' would haunt me day and night. She was a dangerous individual, who had complete control over me, for many years and I never knew it, she will always be there, waiting to finish the job she started.
Writing about my experiences with Vera at the time, when I was removed from work was a difficult undertaking, to say the least. I was still employed by Oxfam and didn't know whether or not I would continue working for them in the future; what I was doing, was a sackable offence. I came up with the name Verruca Almond, the carer, who cared a little too much. just like Vera had claimed, looking out for me, attentive towards my needs. Vera became a great tool for offloading my anger and frustration, putting a lighthearted spin on a situation that was horrendous and horrific in nature.
My housemate at the time, Jay, who also worked for Oxfam would dress up in a ginger wig and thick glasses, he was the spitting image of my nemesis and we would come up with the most bizarre stories associated with this wicked woman. Anyone who knew her, would be under no illusion about whom we were referring.
Many people from our region did read my first and second blog, many still do, following my life, living in Spain away from the ghosts of the past. I was contacted by numerous colleagues who understood just who Vera was, through my muses, stories and recollections. I was a person who had suffered at her hands, but used my writing and Vera to overcome my difficulties.
Vera still pops up from time to time, contacting me when she can; you can of course read all about her, in the Verruca Almond section of this blog. Vera Lynham, my sociopathic boss, will always be in my life because of the crimes she committed. Vera, helps ease the trauma and deal with the pain she caused, because we still need each other; everyone needs someone like Vera in their life; she and others like her are a warning to all of us, to pick those we associate with wisely!
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I had a message from an avid reader of my blog, Bipolarcoaster yesterday; they had been reading about Verruca Almond, the first in a series of parodies, I had written about my ex boss, bully and sociopath, Vera Lynham. This was the woman, who I reported to on a daily basis, the person who I trusted and someone I looked up to, She had worked for Oxfam for about fifteen years and is still there today, in the same region I used to work for. By all accounts she is still up to her old tricks, bullying her way through peoples lives, left unchecked and confirmed in situ by the charity I used to work for.
Verruca Almond first appeared in my blog, Bipolarcoaster, on 20 July 2015, a little over two years ago now. I had recently found out that Vera was a sociopath, or to give it its medical term, she suffered from 'Anti Social Personality Disorder;' I needed a way of expressing my feelings about this person, who I had worked for, for five plus years, choosing to write a parody, referencing her role in my life, not as my employer, but as a carer, teaching me her sociopathic ways, helping me through a difficult time in my life. Of course Verruca, like my Manager wasn't helping me at all, nothing could be further from the truth.Who is Vera?
In order to understand Verruca, one first has to understand Vera, so I will try and explain what I know about her, through conversations with those who knew and worked with her, including her superiors and colleagues; as well as my own experiences.
Vera became my Area Manager in 2009, replacing a man I had always admired, someone who had helped me much during my time at Oxfam. At first I believed she was okay; she was friendly, personable and always fun to be around, at least to begin with. She had been moved from another region, for reasons none of us who worked in the South West, fully understood. Vera used to manage an area in West London, moving down south for dubious reasons, the truth covered up, buried, hidden away. She had always been a bully and was constantly moved from area to area, as her deviant nature became known and other victims stood up to her.
I was attending a 'New Products' meeting at Oxfam House, shortly after she had been installed as our new Commander in Chief, when her name first came up in conversation. I was sat on a table with other colleagues; all of us were discussing our jobs and managers, as part of an introduction, a team building process, as they call it. As soon as I mentioned my Manager, I was immediately confronted by sad, almost sorrowful faces. A lady took me to one side, someone who used to work with her and quietly gave me some advice. I was told to be very careful of her, she wasn't a nice person and I should watch my back.
I was a little confused at the time. Vera was great, she was doing what she could to help me and my career. She reminded me of Mary Poppins, very quietly spoken and always there offering advice; she did feel more like a friend, than an employer. At the time I dismissed comments made by others as just personal grudges from people who were jealous of her success; I didn't recognise this woman they were describing to me.
Vera reminded me of Lady Campanula Tottingham, the cartoon character from Wallace and Gromit, certainly in looks.
I had no reason to doubt her sincerity but then as I am frequently informed, I am a terrible judge of character; this woman was just another terrible person from a long list of bad people in my life, but she was more than that, she really was a deviant individual, working right at the heart of Oxfam. All along I should have been walking away from her, not being drawn in to her web of deceit.
Eventually, I began to realise who she really was, but just couldn't bring myself to quite believe it. Vera Lynham had given me the responsibility of interviewing new Managers with her, helping to employ many. On one occasion, we had to travel to my old home town of Fareham, sitting in a cafe in the shopping centre preparing questions, when she asked for my opinion on a position that had just arose in the area, that of mentor for new Managers. Three people had applied for the position; Dan and Hayley from Hythe and Petula from our Romsey shop; she asked me who I would choose. Immediately I mentioned Hayley; I had heard good reports about her and thought she would be perfect for the job. As soon as I communicated her name, Vera looked up from her notes, scowling at me. 'I would never employ her, she has too many issues, that rule her out. Not even in the running!' I was so shocked at how she spoke about a colleague, stopping all discussion in its tracks, informing me of sensitive information, that I certainly can't print on my blog. As I know now, these two feisty women were at logger heads, constantly, battling one another, working against each other, trying to ruin reputations. These two were very similar individuals; it was likely they were both sociopathic in their behaviour.
As I became ill, through the negligence of Oxfam and growing attacks by Vera, I was signed off work. I was persuaded to take action against Mrs Lynham by Head Office and of course Hayley, who helped myself and my partner draft a series of complaints against this woman, speaking up on our behalf when she could. Hayley was put in place to help me and Darrell, because she was a thorn in Vera's side, a person who was her equal and match and like her had no morals when trying to destroy another person. They both had no conscience, they were both sociopaths, used by Oxfam to try and discredit each other, in order to remove Vera from the organisation she worked for; after all the only match for a sociopath is another sociopath. At the time I found it all very odd, confusing behaviour; today I can understand why everything happened as it did.
The photograph above is a depiction of Vera, as I saw her in my dreams. When I became aware of who or rather what she was, I frequently experienced nightmares and still do to some extent, This 'BLOODY WOMAN' would haunt me day and night. She was a dangerous individual, who had complete control over me, for many years and I never knew it, she will always be there, waiting to finish the job she started.
Writing about my experiences with Vera at the time, when I was removed from work was a difficult undertaking, to say the least. I was still employed by Oxfam and didn't know whether or not I would continue working for them in the future; what I was doing, was a sackable offence. I came up with the name Verruca Almond, the carer, who cared a little too much. just like Vera had claimed, looking out for me, attentive towards my needs. Vera became a great tool for offloading my anger and frustration, putting a lighthearted spin on a situation that was horrendous and horrific in nature.
My housemate at the time, Jay, who also worked for Oxfam would dress up in a ginger wig and thick glasses, he was the spitting image of my nemesis and we would come up with the most bizarre stories associated with this wicked woman. Anyone who knew her, would be under no illusion about whom we were referring.
Many people from our region did read my first and second blog, many still do, following my life, living in Spain away from the ghosts of the past. I was contacted by numerous colleagues who understood just who Vera was, through my muses, stories and recollections. I was a person who had suffered at her hands, but used my writing and Vera to overcome my difficulties.
Vera still pops up from time to time, contacting me when she can; you can of course read all about her, in the Verruca Almond section of this blog. Vera Lynham, my sociopathic boss, will always be in my life because of the crimes she committed. Vera, helps ease the trauma and deal with the pain she caused, because we still need each other; everyone needs someone like Vera in their life; she and others like her are a warning to all of us, to pick those we associate with wisely!
