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    Tesco's End - Farewell to a faithful old friend!

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    This week, I have finally said a fond farewell to my job at Tesco. After nearly five years, I emailed my letter of resignation on Friday, ending what was probably the most productive period of my life in Britain. This was the hardest decision I had to make, but the reality is, my lifestyle break had come to an end, when I started a full time job here in Australia. The contract dictates the steps I had to take under such circumstances and with a little bit of prompting from my now ex-boss Sammy, I handed in my notice with immediate effect. Sammy was instrumental in ensuring I was able to take such an important career break in the first place; after some deeply painful days in Britain before we left, she was there offering support when I needed it most. Without her, our success now, may well have ended very differently and for that I will always be grateful!

    The truth is, I hate goodbyes, and this was one I really didn't want to say. I understand I haven't been working in Fratton for five months now, but by holding on to the possibility, I may return to my job one day, I was somewhat comforted. You may well call it a safety net, or just not wanting to let go, but for me, it was about holding on to the good times and life enhancing memories that I made, everyday I went to work, behind the customer Service Desk. There were no bad shifts, although in reality there probably were, but nothing to speak of, and I always thoroughly enjoyed my time at Tesco; luckily for me, I will always look back at my time with fondness and there aren't many jobs you can say that about.

    I don't think I have every really worked somewhere quite like it; the people were the most generous, giving and open bunch I have ever met and all of them felt like the family I needed at that time. Most people spoke of the friendly atmosphere and just how well colleagues got on with one another, but it wasn't until I left in September 2022, at the beginning of my journey to Australia, that I realised just how much I was going to miss the place.

    I have to be honest now, and I know some of you won't appreciate it, but there isn't much I am going to miss about Fratton. I never enjoyed living there and would never want to live there again, but the friends I made, the generosity of spirit you see in the people from Tesco and indeed Fratton as a whole, is truly heart-warming. This was a community that treated everyone with respect and dignity, no matter what their background, and the enduring memories I made will stay with me for the rest of my life.

    When I look back to my departure and those last few weeks at Tesco, I don't think I have ever felt more loved in my life. These were my family in all but name, they gave me everything I needed - from a shoulder to cry on, advice and direction, or a place to crash if the worst came to the worst. My colleagues, no, my FRIENDS, were there encouraging me, every step of the way, and I will miss them all, especially now everything is so final!

    My time at Tesco coincided with some momentous events, not only in my life, but also in the history of the World. I started working there after returning from Spain, while Darrell was in Australia caring for his Mother. When I needed support, the team were there for me. It was never a chore going into work, in fact if you ask anyone who worked there, I was more often than not, early, so I could chat with friends. This was just what I needed, as I tried to build a life temporarily without my husband. This sense of belonging became even more crucial when the pandemic took hold in 2020; all of us bonded in a way that would have been unthinkable before.

    Working through the worst public health crisis in a hundred years was often scary, especially during the early days, when none of us knew just how bad things would get. I remember working on the desk, which looked more like a bunker, with fruit and veg crates piled in front, as a barrier between customers and us. There was no PPE or sanitizer initially, and Tesco did everything they could to ensure our safety; these were times of great anxiety and stress, but they were also days of comradeship, laughter and music.

    As shops closed, theatres were boarded up, pubs, music venues and places of entertainment shut their doors, Tesco remained open. Things were very different, of course, but we hosted events on those great occasions that would normally see people celebrating in the streets. From VE day to Christmas, we all did our best to make sure customers enjoyed their time; after all, we were the only stores open in this new dystopian World. Supermarkets were crucial as key workers like me made our way to work every day, through deserted, empty streets, to serve customers and hopefully brightening their day.

    Today I am lucky to include many customers as friends, born out of the pandemic and the respect we showed for one another. From the Fox Lady, Joanne and her multicoloured hair, and the dear late Mrs Fisher, who I talked with throughout the pandemic, until her death just over a year ago. Together with colleagues, Managers and all those on Front End Support, I had the best four and a half years of my life.

    I have shed a tear or two, as I moved across the World, which is only natural. Things will never really be the same again. I am, however, aware of where my future lies, but I am also mindful of where my journey began. The World was just a little bit sweeter at Tesco and I laughed just a little bit more; I hugged so much better (even throughout the pandemic, naughty I know) and I was just a little bit, yes just a little bit happier, in a job I loved more than any other that had gone before.

    I leave behind people I love and always will, the memories of a special time in my life, friends like you wouldn't believe and of course my biggest, bestest, loveliest friend of all - Jules, my big Brother, forever, and someone I wish I'd got to know better. Nevertheless, we will always be there for each other, as much as we can, and when the time is right I'll be back in Fratton, sharing the love; picking up from where I left off, the day I closed my locker door, rekindling the nostalgia I will always feel!

    Dedicated to Jules, my Brother from another Mother!


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    The Dreaded Form 80!

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    January 2023 has been a month filled with paperwork. I don't think I have ever had so much form filling to do in all my life. Not that long ago, I used to think the bureaucracy in Spain was bad, when we moved there in 2018, but Australia beats it by a mile. I have always been mindful of just how difficult it is to move here, which is why I have constantly avoided making the decision to live in Perth full-time. After everything Darrell and I have been through over the years, it just wasn't something we really wanted to go through. However, circumstances change, and it has become a necessary evil; we have had to bite the bullet and do what is necessary.

    From Medicare, the tax office, work related documents and now the dreaded 'form 80,' my life is just drowning in paperwork and there doesn't seem to be an end in sight quite yet. This week, my Immigration lawyer contacted me, saying I would need to fill in a form to assess my character. This isn't usual practice with a partner visa application, but because of several minor infringements when I was young, it is something I have to do.

    To be honest, I never really imagined I would have to fill in such a form, since the convictions are twenty-five years old and committed as a rash, young twenty-year-old, after a rather intoxicating night out - that will teach me, never to act in such an impulsive manner again. A small altercation in 1997, is enough for the Department of Home Affairs in Australia, to delve deeper into my life. When I say deeper, I literally mean, as deep as it can get; it isn't, no laughing matter.

    Providing job and address history since the year of my birth is no mean feat; I am lucky however to have documented my life over many years, and hold much of that information on my laptop. Going through all of that data has proved rather time-consuming, nevertheless. My computer filing system isn't the most logical, and the biggest challenge has been hunting down the important files. Thankfully, I have found the majority of what I need, and was able to submit the form to my lawyer yesterday.

    I was always warned how difficult moving to Australia would be, so was aware such difficulties were bound to arise. Despite this, Darrell and I are very committed to this country and being close to his Mother at what is a crucial time. We are also lucky, to have the luxury, of time on our side. Both of us have been together for nearly twenty-seven years now, so proving our relationship together isn't difficult. The events and milestones that make up our time together, annoyingly, aren't always consistent in the same way, as a heterosexual couple, which can prove problematic. As gay men growing up in the eighties and nineties, our life was very much dictated by circumstances beyond our control. A lack of support, no access to help and advice, and the stigma of homosexuality imposed by successive Governments and less than desirable people, has always tried to thwart our relationship at every turn.

    We are well-used to having to fight to stay together, forging a way through the red tape and despite the heartache and pain this causes, we have always managed to come back stronger than ever before. I understand how important it is for Australia to check our commitment together and my background as an individual. I personally have nothing to hide and have always been open and transparent with the authorities here. It is always best to be honest, tell the truth and admit your failings in life. A momentary indiscretion twenty-five years ago, may not be a reason to bar me from settling with my husband down under, but lying about it, certainly is.

    This week, will end in the same way it began. With our completion date only days away now, it is important to focus on the end goals and not dwell on things I have no control over. I hope things turn out for the best, but I am always a realist at heart; if the worst comes to the worst, we will head back to the UK and restart where we left off. For now, that is a long way off; let's hope my honesty will pay dividends, and we can finally begin to live the rest of our life together.

    Happy Australia Day
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    On a much lighter note, today is Australia Day, and a national holiday here in Australia. Unlike Darrell, I have had the day off and spent it relaxing, something I don't do very often at the moment. Australia Day is a controversial date; it marks the landing of the First Fleet at Sydney Cove and the raising of the Union Flag by Arthur Phillip in 1788. This is therefore a white settler holiday and, for the aboriginal community, marks the destruction of their way of life and the culture they hold dear. Everyone who celebrates this day, should be conscious of that fact!

    I have not celebrated today in the traditional sense, but I have followed events closely on television, purely out of curiosity.  It is important for me to immerse myself in all aspects of Australian culture, and today is just a part of that process!

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    Cor Blimey, It's been a Scorcher!

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    Cor Blimey, Governor, it's been a hot one. Today has been the hottest day in Perth, so far this year and considering 2023 has only just started, I bet there are a few more days like this to come. The temperature in Midland reached a top of 43 degrees earlier today; well, that's what it registered on my Fitbit anyway, but luckily I was working in a lovely air-conditioned shop. I'm really not used to these extreme temperatures, coming from the UK, but having lived in Spain I am more used to the heat than most. Surprisingly, however, there is very little humidity here, so you don't really sweat in the same way you would during a humid UK summer.

    Today is also the end of the second week in my new job, and I am looking forward to a few days well-earned rest. The last couple of weeks have been particularly stressful because of everything that has been going on. The house sale is progressing well, after Darrell and I had the mortgage confirmed by Commonwealth bank, and we are looking to move very soon; everything is just so fast here. When the Home loan was confirmed, we were given a fifteen-day settlement date, and we should be in our new villa by the middle of February. Thankfully for us, there will be no stamp duty to pay. Under normal circumstances, we would have been liable for a bill of $8000, but because we are first time buyers here, Western Australia has waved that fee.

    On Monday we have a surveyor checking the house, and always up for a bargain, I am shopping around for the cheapest settlement solicitor in Perth. So far I have been quoted $1000 less than the original price I was given. Darrell is worrying about letting the other firm down, but I am of the opinion, why should we pay more for the same service? Yes I may be tight, but in all honesty, I have to be. Saving the cents is important for me now, especially with mortgage repayments of $1300 a month.

    We decided to take out a variable rate mortgage, in order to pay it off as quickly as possible. We want to repay it within ten years, which is doable, as long as interest rates start to stabilise. Furthermore, we are both lucky to be earning a very good wage, so can afford to double our repayments each month and pay it back in record time. Of course, only time will tell if that actually happens or not. I am confident, that as long as we continue on the same path we are on now, we won't have too much to worry about.

    The paperwork trail this week has been astronomical, we just haven't stopped filling in forms. However, most of this has been done remotely and with the help of our amazing mortgage broker at the bank, we have managed to get this done and dusted relatively quickly. Yes, I am stressed and sleeping less, but I am also working and able to concentrate my efforts elsewhere, thus avoiding worrying about moving, every day.

    When all is said and done, we have achieved our goals in superfast time. Not only do we both have well paid jobs, but we are also buying a house, new car and looking forward to the rest of our life together. It really has been a long road getting here, but I can finally say, without a shadow of a doubt, we made the right decision. Putting the past behind us is our overriding priority now. Those who have played an important role in our future are welcome with open arms, as for the rest, well, they are just a warning to do better in future. This isn't the first new start we have had, but it is the most successful to date; for that reason it is important to stay focused, and remain positive as this new year progresses. This is the life we have both craved for so long, the success we have dreamed of, and the break we both need; finally contentment it's only a heartbeat away!

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    New Year, New Home!

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    This month is turning out to be busy, beyond busy to be more accurate. Not only did I start a new job last week, but Darrell and I have finally found a home; everything seems to be coming together at once. As stressed as I am, I understand just how important it is for me to relax. I came to Australia for a change in pace, not to inadvertently increase my blood pressure (which is perfectly fine at the moment) and have absolutely no time to myself. Nevertheless, I have to accept just how fast the pieces are falling into place and, for once, embrace the possibilities that are coming in thick and fast. To think I used to hate this place and never saw Western Australia as a land of opportunity nor a long term solution to our ambitions and aspirations, when actually, currently, it is!

    The house is a three-bedroom villa in a small community of six dwellings, just off Morrison Road in Perth. Interestingly, it was built the same year Darrell and I got together, in 1995 and is a typical Australian home. It has a large kitchen and family room, a laundry and separate toilet and a formal lounge at the front of the property. The house is also air-conditioned throughout and is in relatively good decorative order.

    There is a very small courtyard garden at the side of the property, which, although small, suits us perfectly; neither of us want the responsibility of a garden. We don't have the time or desire to be outside gardening, especially in the Australian climate.

    Having said that, there is work to do outside; the boundary fence is coming down, and it will need to be replaced or fixed. I also want to repave the outside areas and shade part of the outlook at the back, so we don't have to look directly onto the highway at the rear of the house. Some people would be put off by the proximity to a major road, but for us, city dwellers at heart, it is perfectly fine. We will be a five-minute walk to Midland Gate shopping Centre and a twenty-minute walk to my place of work. The set-up works for us, but it wouldn't be to everyones taste. I like being close to local amenities and although there are aesthetics to sort out, I am happy to get to grips with that in time. After all, if you had seen some of the places I have lived in the past, you'd understand why!

    With the offer accepted, now comes the hard bit. We have arrived in Australia without a stick of furniture, so that is now on a priority list. For now, we will get what we desperately require, and the rest can wait. What it does mean, however, is we will have to put a lower deposit down on the villa, so we have some spare cash to buy what we need. Luckily furniture and electrical goods are a lot cheaper here, so I have worked out we will have to pay out $13,000 initially, which is achievable in the short term, especially with us both working. We also need to buy a car, especially now I want to start my driving lessons again, and I personally want a contingency left for maintenance and any eventualities that may occur.

    I have also discussed getting a mortgage where I can repay far more than I have to. I want to pay it off in record time. The only way I can do this, is by getting a variable rate home loan, which is a bit scary at the moment, with interest rates continuing to rise in Australia. It is either that or have a fixed rate mortgage, which restricts payments; that isn't something I am contemplating, but will discuss the possibilities with Rob, our wonderful Mortgage Broker at The Commonwealth Bank, over the next few weeks.

    All being well, we should be in the house within a maximum of eight weeks; in fact, it could be a lot sooner than that. The current owner, who is in Queensland, has already said we can move in before completion, once the Mortgage has gone through. The whole process here is far more relaxed and laid back, which is actually a bonus for me, especially having started a new job at the same time. The easier this period is, the better.

    So Darrell and I have reached yet another milestone in record time, and we are both delighted. On the surface at least, for now, Australia seems to have been the best move we have made. Of course part of me thinks we should have done it years ago, but the other half remembers the memories we made in between, principally in Spain. We can always look back in hindsight and imagine, 'what if?' The important thing today, however, is to move forward with our life and try to build a future, once again, from scratch; luckily that doesn't phase me one bit. Neither of us are young any more, but age aside, this is just another steppingstone on our journey together. Australia will be our home for now, where we hope to make even more happy memories to share with all of you.

    A little bit of retail therapy to stay positive this afternoon, as we wait for the final stage of the mortgage. As long as the house is OK, and the bank think it's worth the money, then we are good to go. In the meantime, I've got shopping to do!... Thank God for Kmart; I'll always be a pikey at heart.
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