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    Congratulations To The Stewardsons!

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    I would like to wish two fantastic friends, Katie and Andy Stewardson, huge congratulations on the birth of their new baby son Sebastián, born on 28th August 2019. It has been a while since I saw these two, but they are both very much in my thoughts as I write this entry today!

    Katie, husband Andy and their little daughter Lexi, became close, during mine and Darrell's time living in Gran Alacant, especially Katie and I. Both our husbands were away quite a lot during the time I lived here, consequently Katie and I became inseparable and enjoyed a fruitful friendship, despite the ups and downs of Spanish life.

    Andy and Katie have found happiness and prosperity in Spain and now enjoy a productive and vigorous life, living in the country they love. Sebastián will be brought up alongside his Spanish peers and will become part of continental life, in a way many of us can only dream of. I hope to return to Spain one day soon and rekindle our friendship by starting where we left off. Whether or not Darrell and I decide to live there long term, as we did three years ago is anyone's guess, but in the meantime we are delighted to observe from the sidelines, watching this family grow and flourish in their new chosen home!

    As Brexit turmoil continues to engulf British sensibility, it is heartwarming to see young people taking the plunge and forging a new life abroad. Whether you support Britain's withdrawal from the EU or want to remain, all of us should agree that our destiny lies at the heart of Europe. It would be a travesty if future generations were stopped from moving to pastures new because of policies that are designed to isolate Britain from the rest of the World. Katie and Andy are an example to us all, in how we can proliferate in new, untested, untried corners of the globe!

    Congratulations to you all!
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    Life On The Ocean Waves!

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    On Sunday I made the short trip to Southsea Marina to have a look at a small yacht. I had been speaking to a colleague at work, someone I always call Mrs M, (so will continue to do so, for the purpose of this entry) and discovered her interest in boating; something I had never considered myself, but a way of life that really interests me and she invited me along to have a look at a boat that is currently for sale.

    In reality, I know nothing about boats, but the sea and sailing is certainly in my blood. My Grandfather was a Merchant Seaman, my Uncle was in the Navy and coming from the South Coast of England, you can’t help but have an interest in all things nautical. I felt completely at home visiting this beautiful marina, with fantastic facilities, lovely views and well maintained piers and was really taken aback by this little boat; it would be an ideal second home for Darrell and I.

    Not only do I no nothing about boats, but I can’t even swim - ‘You must be bloody mad!’ I here you cry and maybe I am, but I have got to an age in my life, where I want to do something different. Moving to Spain was part of that ‘doing something different’ process and it didn’t work out, but that doesn’t mean I should just give up and do nothing. I can learn to swim and sail, it can’t be that difficult, or I could just keep the yacht moored, visiting it on weekends as a sort of retreat; a place to relax, unwind and write!

    The boat is small – Entering the cabin, there are two upholstered benches, various items of boating equipment and a television set. There is a small kitchen, opposite is a toilet and finally a bedroom with double bed. It wasn’t at all what I was expecting, but I absolutely loved it, instantly falling in love, which is normally a bad sign for me, but this time, I have my feet firmly on the ground and not in the clouds.

    I spent a lovely afternoon chatting about life living on a boat and the pros and cons of surviving in such a confined space, but at the end of it all, I was more in love with this yacht than ever. A few beers in the Marina restaurant, a walk around this peaceful location and a discussion about finance and I was ready to buy, well not literally there and then, but I am as smitten with ‘Sea Crystal’ now as I was yesterday. This could be the start of something new, exciting and very different to what I have done before!

    Could I really be suited to a life on the ocean waves? Well yes, maybe I could!

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    Gay Grandma, Kirsty and Imogen!

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    On Thursday I met an old friend, someone I haven’t seen since 2015 and someone who played an important part in mine and Darrell’s life – Kirsty, a young lady with a heart of gold and a person who was always there for me, when times got rough, as they often did. I have very little time to see anyone these days, so for me it was fantastic meeting with Kirsty after so long. Since returning to the UK, I have started a process of reconnecting with many of those I was closest to and relaying the foundations of friendship, in a way I never did before.

    In 2015, Kirsty gave birth to a lovely baby girl, after what I can only describe as a traumatic, upsetting and stressful time. We can’t choose who we ultimately fall in love with and Kirsty just got involved with the wrong guy. On the positive side she was now the Mother to Imogen, who became integral to all our lives.

    For the next five months we all became close, spending as much time together as we could, before Darrell and I left for our new life in Spain in January 2016. Kirsty called us gay Grandma and Grandad and her and Imogen often stayed over at our home in Southampton, as we packed up our lives and sold our possessions before our date of departure. Imogen was the first child in my life; I had never been around children before, even though I was an Uncle. Family issues and a break down in communication had prevented me from fulfilling a role that in reality I would have cherished.

    During Imogen’s first few weeks, I was reluctant to hold her at all, as I still am with any child. My lack of experience was always a barrier to bonding with any baby, let alone one so young and fragile, so I looked in from the outside, as others played their part. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t feel left out, I just didn’t want the responsibility of cradling a new born. In time that changed and I soon became able to hold imogen, eventually becoming very attached to this little girl, sadly just in time for us to move abroad.

    Seeing ‘not so little’ imogen on Thursday, I was amazed by how grown up she was. Unbelieveably, she is only four years old, but extremely intelligent and able to hold an almost adult conversation. As a Mum, Kirsty has done an amazing job bringing her up on her own. She is polite, respectful and clearly loves her Mum with all her heart. It was wonderful to see these two, so close and happy together, especially after the difficulties of the past.

    All of us spent a perfect day together, beginning with lunch at the Ship Anson, along the coast near Portsmouth’s Historic Dockyard. With a bottle of Australian Chardonnay, we chatted about the past and looked forward to the future. Kirsty has grown as a person in all respects, her life although not the easiest, shows just how far she has come and as we ate our pub lunch I was aware of just how much I had changed to, becoming a much better person than I once was and far happier now than ever.

    Imogen gripped hold of mine and her Mothers hand tightly, as we left the pub, walking the short distance to the sea front, funfair and beach. Kirsty and Imogen went on the Waltzer, while I happily stood to one side taking photographs. I was never a fan of this ride and like me, when I first went on this dreaded whirligig, Kirsty was a little sick, running to the toilets to get changed and try and regain a little composure...There is a reason I don’t do fairgrounds as a rule!

    Finally we took a short walk along the stony beach, watching the Hovercraft fly in from the Isle of Wight, collecting stones and breathing in the sea air, followed by a few hours in the arcades playing on the coin pushers, just like I used to, with my family forty or so years ago. I felt like I had travelled back in time, for a short period and enjoyed dipping into my childhood, even if it was brief. Suitably tired we left, walking along the city castle walls in time to catch the train back home!

    It wont be too long before I see Kirsty and Imogen again; I hope they will remain as close as they can from now onwards. It is true we all lead busy lives, but as we all get older it is important to cherish the friendships we have and make time for each other. All of us have changed during the intervening years, whilst Darrell and I were living in Spain, but it was great to pick up from where we left off and begin our journey once again!
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    Queen at The Queens!

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    The August Bank Holiday Monday was hot and I was spending the day at The Queens Hotel in Southsea, at a garden party in the sun! The tribute act 'Forever Queen' were playing to a packed audience in this plush Portsmouth hotel.

    I arrived with some friends from work and spent an enjoyable time, relaxing after another busy week. There were many people at this holiday event and it was fantastic to just let ones hair down for a few hours, drinking, dancing and chatting with those who play a significant role in my life.
    What could be better, after sitting in the hot sun for the afternoon, but a civilized meal with more colleagues and friends at the John Jacques in Fratton. For me, a few pints of orange juice and lemonade and a rather diet busting, calorific all day brunch, followed by cake and ice cream; comfort food, to end the perfect day!
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    Getting Healthy!

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    Keeping fit and trying to lose weight, has always been an activity, I have had difficulty with. I have spent my whole life dieting in one way or another, so it is natural I have reached another crossroads in my life, where I need to do something to get healthy once again. To be honest, I did consider another strict calorie controlled diet, but soon realised it wouldn't work. Why wont it work? Well I have tried that approach many times before and I have always failed somewhere down the line, usually just a few days into it!

    This time I wanted to do something different and really start to eat healthier, without restricting myself too much. As an all or nothing person, I have never chosen the middle ground; extremes are my forte. During the times when I did rigorously eat an uncompromising diet, it felt like a prison sentence and I soon got fed up with the austere nature of what I was doing. All I did was crave the things I liked and eat the things I didn't. This was a sure fire way to fail and it wasn't long before I got fed up with the whole palaver and just continued down a self destructive path of binge eating, even in secret.

    So today I am cutting down, choosing healthier alternatives and most importantly reducing the size of the meals I eat. On top of this sensible eating plan, I have also decided to reduce the carbohydrates in my diet dramatically, but not altogether. If I stop eating carbs completely, I will crave them all the more and surely fail at the first hurdle. Buying food that is lower in carbohydrates is a good start for me; low carb bread as well as fresh fruit and vegetables and more salads should help me lose weight. Yesterday I also made some Cauliflower Rice, by blending the vegetable up into grain size pieces and quickly frying it in olive oil; served with Chili, it tasted delicious. It worked surprisingly well, despite my initial apprehension and didn't taste of cauliflower at all.

    So it's back to healthy eating for me, not a bad thing when one considers the amount of walking I do a day and the cigarettes I no longer smoke. It is about time I took charge of my own destiny, and as I drift towards my fiftieth year, I am fully aware of what I need to do in order to live a longer, healthier life. My body no longer feels and acts like the twenty year old, who used to drink, smoke  and party hard; today it is in need of an MOT and an overhaul, accepting what it can and can't do. Realising ones age and changing ones lifestyle is an important part of maintaining the perfect balance between body and mind. My mind is as healthy as it has ever been, my body, well, just needs work...Could do better as they say. Hopefully this time, I will succeed where I have failed in the past!
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