A little over a week ago, I was going through my youtube account checking messages when I came across one from someone at Oxfam, the charity I used to work for four years ago. I started blogging in 2015, because of my experiences working for them. As readers to all my blogs are well aware, my role in this organisation wasn't a happy one and ended in a 'traumatic time,' causing great anxiety and stress for my partner and I. My health and state of mind suffered and I took the decision to resign. The stories of my time are littered throughout this blog, detailing a period that I had until recently put on the back burner.
The correspondence I received was from a man called Lee, not his real name, but the alias I shall refer to him as during this entry. In one of my youtube videos, I discussed my thoughts and feelings towards the charity I used to be a part of and dedicated my life to. The video in question was taken whilst I was living in Spain, two years after I had left the UK, still dealing with the aftermath of this terrible chapter in my life.
Lee had worked for Oxfam just like me, in a different role, far higher than mine and had also suffered abuse in the same way and wanted to talk about his experiences. The one thing I have discovered from my years blogging, is it is good to offload ones problems, either through scribbling ones recollections down or chatting informally with family, friends and colleagues. For me writing has been a life saver, helping me out more than any other activity since I left Oxfam. Lee on the other hand wanted to talk to someone who had gone through the same distress and hardship as him; luckily he came across my story and we were able to chat on the phone for over an hour a few days ago.
Listening to other people, who have also suffered at Oxfam's hands has become a regular feature in my life. Even today, I get a few dozen emails a day from people either connected to Oxfam or from those who have left and restarted their lives. Lee was lucky, he chose to leave his position and follow a new career in the private sector, something he doesn't regret. Like Lee, I am happy to be working for my current employer, I feel valued and listened to, part of a team and rewarded for all my hard work, unlike the years I spent at Oxfam. I was pleased to hear another survivor was moving forwards and not letting terrible injustices get in the way of their future!
Lee and I discussed our respective encounters and the ordeal we both endured and were surprised at the similarities in our stories and the same names that kept cropping up during our conversation...The usual suspects were still running amok, unchecked and without conscience through Oxfam and people like Lee were getting badly hurt in the process. He also appealed for help on many occasions, but was sidelined, ignored and passed over, his pleas for understanding ridiculed by the very people who should have been there to help. This was indeed a similar account of life at this well known trust and one I was happy to recount again, in order to help someone else, who needs to find closure at the end of a very debilitating period.
Lee described in great detail, just what he went through, sociopathic behaviour in abundance, disgusting bullying abuses that I was very familiar with and all I could do was sympathise with this eloquent, sensitive and empathetic young man. There is very little I can do on the surface to help people like Lee, come to terms with what happened to them, but I can be there to listen and give advice, based on my experiences. The pain we both tolerated for too long is still very raw and will never go away. It does become easier to live with what transpired at Oxfam, but it will not be possible to move on and finally forget until all those responsible for the mistreatment of me and others are finally brought to justice.
Lee decided not to go down an official route and complain to Head Office directly, he chose to walk away and doesn't regret his decision. He does however want to do something to protect his fellow colleagues from what he went through and I have encouraged him to do what he can. Contacting the Charities Commission, Oxfam's Board of Trusties and his local MP is a great starting point. The more information all of these groups have against Oxfam, the easier it will be to prosecute those who destroyed peoples lives. I wish Lee well and hope he will also consider writing for Roaming Brit in the future!
Lee had worked for Oxfam just like me, in a different role, far higher than mine and had also suffered abuse in the same way and wanted to talk about his experiences. The one thing I have discovered from my years blogging, is it is good to offload ones problems, either through scribbling ones recollections down or chatting informally with family, friends and colleagues. For me writing has been a life saver, helping me out more than any other activity since I left Oxfam. Lee on the other hand wanted to talk to someone who had gone through the same distress and hardship as him; luckily he came across my story and we were able to chat on the phone for over an hour a few days ago.
Listening to other people, who have also suffered at Oxfam's hands has become a regular feature in my life. Even today, I get a few dozen emails a day from people either connected to Oxfam or from those who have left and restarted their lives. Lee was lucky, he chose to leave his position and follow a new career in the private sector, something he doesn't regret. Like Lee, I am happy to be working for my current employer, I feel valued and listened to, part of a team and rewarded for all my hard work, unlike the years I spent at Oxfam. I was pleased to hear another survivor was moving forwards and not letting terrible injustices get in the way of their future!
Lee and I discussed our respective encounters and the ordeal we both endured and were surprised at the similarities in our stories and the same names that kept cropping up during our conversation...The usual suspects were still running amok, unchecked and without conscience through Oxfam and people like Lee were getting badly hurt in the process. He also appealed for help on many occasions, but was sidelined, ignored and passed over, his pleas for understanding ridiculed by the very people who should have been there to help. This was indeed a similar account of life at this well known trust and one I was happy to recount again, in order to help someone else, who needs to find closure at the end of a very debilitating period.
Lee described in great detail, just what he went through, sociopathic behaviour in abundance, disgusting bullying abuses that I was very familiar with and all I could do was sympathise with this eloquent, sensitive and empathetic young man. There is very little I can do on the surface to help people like Lee, come to terms with what happened to them, but I can be there to listen and give advice, based on my experiences. The pain we both tolerated for too long is still very raw and will never go away. It does become easier to live with what transpired at Oxfam, but it will not be possible to move on and finally forget until all those responsible for the mistreatment of me and others are finally brought to justice.
Lee decided not to go down an official route and complain to Head Office directly, he chose to walk away and doesn't regret his decision. He does however want to do something to protect his fellow colleagues from what he went through and I have encouraged him to do what he can. Contacting the Charities Commission, Oxfam's Board of Trusties and his local MP is a great starting point. The more information all of these groups have against Oxfam, the easier it will be to prosecute those who destroyed peoples lives. I wish Lee well and hope he will also consider writing for Roaming Brit in the future!
