Happy Holidays Everyone!!!!! Hey everyone thanks again for checking out my latest blog post and the last one of 2018. What a year 2018 has been – some good stuff has happened and some not so good stuff. I’ve decided not to focus on it too much and instead focus on 2019 instead. I’m really excited for 2019 already and some of the possibilities and challenges (good ones) that I will face. I think the last few years have proved how resilient I can be and how I can adapt quickly. Going forwards this is going to be key for 2019 and especially when I tackle the ultra in August – I know there are going to be some really tough moments during the event where I question my ability, question my reasoning, and question my inner-strength to carry on. I also know that I can overcome those tough moments and get through them and get to that finish line. As I’ve said in previous blogs if the ultra goes ok, I remain injury free, and the motivation is still high then in 2020 I’ll do a 100km (62 miles) event!! With some time off over the festive period I am hoping to get in some decent training runs which are a bit longer than I’ve already been doing – it’ll also give me a good reason to eat a few more mince pies!!!! I’m hoping to get back into the hills and mountains again next year. There is nothing I like more than being in that kind of terrain – I just love the vastness and the tranquillity of it. One trip already spoken about is a trip to Snowdon to tackle Snowdonia. It’d be great if I had some time to do at least one long trail run there as well. I have unfinished business on Ben Nevis and am considering heading up to Scotland to tackle that. I have spent time in the past on the Brecon Beacons and the Lake District and am also considering some time in either area (or both). With the South Downs and New Forest nearby as well I need to take advantage of those areas as well – both would be fantastic places to train on. I’m also looking forward to the usual stuff as well – going to football with my cousin and friends, spending time with family and friends, seeing The Specials at Victorious festival, and just enjoying the things I enjoy doing away from training and working. I’m determined to make 2019 a memorable one and for good reasons. This time next year I want to be able to look back and have no regrets and feel that I couldn’t have given it anymore. Happy holidays and see you in 2019.
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As we approach the end of the year I always find that it is a good time to reflect on what I have achieved and what I want to achieve in the forthcoming year. I have had to do a lot of soul searching this year and there have been some really tough moments. There have been times when I have felt that I was not good enough in certain situations or where I have been really hard on myself, beaten myself up over things, and dragged myself down quite a bit. I hit a downward spiral this year and it hit me really hard. I think it was the culmination of a few tough years and suddenly I became overwhelmed with things and events. I think it has made me a stronger person but not always a better person though. I still feel that I let people down at times and also let myself down. There are times when I seem unapproachable and ‘prickly’ though I do not intend to be that way. I’ve thought about this over the last few weeks and I think it is because I have a habit of putting the barriers up as I try and figure out how I am feeling about things. When I do this I have a habit of completely shutting people out and that is not always a good thing. A couple of months ago I was on the verge of moving away and starting again somewhere else – I don’t think that it would have changed much though. Same issues, different location. Quite a few people told me I was making the wrong decision and I can see that now. I have lived in Portsmouth since last August and have made some really good friends down here – they know who they are and I appreciate them being part of my life and my world. I’m looking forward to 2019. I’m not placing any expectations on myself or what the year will bring. Instead I am seeing it as a totally blank page and I am determined to fill that blank page with achievements that I will be proud of and finish the year feeling I couldn’t have given any more. I achieve my best when I am pushing myself well outside of my comfort zone and I am determined to push myself a lot in 2019. It isn’t just about running the ultra in August. Although that is really important it is just one goal I have next year and is an important part of the overall journey. I need to challenge myself professionally and push my career onwards. I enjoy my job and I am good at what I do but I need to progress in order to grow. I need to challenge myself personally. I can be a bit of a creature of habit a lot of the time – part of that is due to being organised and liking a routine. I don’t want to get to the finish line of the ultra next year and be thinking ‘now what?’ which is why it is important that I have other goals to work towards. As I reflect on 2018 and how some of it has been tough going I do feel I needed to go through that so I could look deep inside of myself and ask myself some tough questions and see what I am really made of.
It has been a couple of weeks since my last blog entry and things have been ok-ish I guess. A heavy cold a couple of weeks ago put paid to any ideas I had about training which was frustrating after 4 weeks of making really good progress. The problem was the motivation to do anything else went out of the window as well and the focused routine I had got myself into went to pieces and I spent the best part of the week being really hard on myself, as I wasn’t really doing the things I should have been! I have this habit of being hard on myself when I am not doing the things that I feel I should be doing. I missed one week of training – now in reflection was this a bad thing? Probably not as had I forced myself out the door my performance would have been below-par and it would have lengthened my recovery. The frustration was not being able to train but I need to be well in order to train. My routine went out of the window and I spent a few days playing catch up afterwards – was this such a bad thing? I did get things done – some decorating and I did some batch cooking as well and the freezer is full of stuff ready to go when time is a bit more limited. I think the problem lies more with my motivation being good and then I am thrown a bit of a curve ball which is somewhat unexpected at the time and it can sometimes throw me off course and that is the point at which my routine goes out of the window a bit and the frustrations with myself creep in. Am I sometimes being too hard on myself? Are my expectations outweighing my capacity at times? I need to realise that sometimes I will not be able to follow the routine I expect – there are going to be challenges and issues – everyday life, work, feeling run down or tired (meaning that resting up will actually benefit me in the long run(!) rather than pushing myself to breaking point), having niggles or injuries, or the weather is such that it is just not practical to get out and train (though I am hoping we don’t get any snow!) One of the things I need to start doing is not reflecting on what I haven’t done but rather than reflecting on what I have done – it may not have been what I planned but at least something is better than nothing at times. Once I got back out running the one thing I noticed was I was absolutely chomping at the bit to get out there again – the motivation has not dropped which is fantastic. My focus when I am training is really good – ear-phones in and listening to music, switched off from the rest of the world and just focusing on putting one foot in front of the other. Not caring about time or distance – just being out there and enjoying what I am doing. My run on Saturday wasn’t in the greatest of weather – running along a coastal path into a headwind with the rain in my face – and I actually enjoyed every second of it. I know over the next couple of months the weather is going to change (at the moment it is unbelievably mild for the time of year) and the training sessions are going to get longer so I need to keep that focus high on every session. As the sessions get longer I am finding newer parts of the route to run on and I find this really motivating – what is around the next corner? Where does this part of the path lead to? Every step is part of this journey and quite a lot of that is unknown – this is something I should learn to embrace and adapt with and move forwards with – not just with my training but also other aspects of my life as well.
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AuthorRichard Guy, 47 years of age, born and grew up in London and have lived in Portsmouth since 2017. Archives
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