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It was the first day of the new Football season on Saturday and Portsmouth were at home to Tranmere, another football Club apparently. I jest, of course I know they are a team, but 'The Beautiful Game,' just isn't my favourite sport, actually no sport is my favourite sport, so it is no better or worse than anything else. However I have been in Pompey now for a little over a year, so I am getting used to the locals love of all things sporty, Working in a football mad  bar, I don't really have a choice, I have to get involved to a certain extent and I am learning much about this sport from the fans who frequent the Newcome Arms where I work!

As a child my Father always tried to get me interested in football, taking me to the park, playing kick about, just like all the other Dads on a Saturday afternoon, but I wasn't having any of it. By all accounts, I hated kicking a ball about so much, I would just sit there on a park bench crying, unwilling to move, having a tantrum at the mere thought of it!

When I attended school, things weren't any better and I would often bunk off from Physical Education lessons, to smoke a cigarette or five behind the bike sheds. Rather than getting involved in the undignified effort of playing a game that would make me dirty, sweaty and probably suffer from some kind of injury; I would puff my way through a packet of ten JPS...Cigarette smoke was far safer!

Even when I did have to play football, I was always the last one chosen; I would hang around the goalposts, trying to avoid the ball. On the rare occasion a football headed in my direction, I would flinch, put my hands over my face and hope it would just go away. I'm sure you are all well aware by now, of just how much I loathed this manly, filthy sport; it's only saving grace, men wearing tight white shorts and the homoerotic visions that promoted.

On the one any only time I went to a football match, with a friend called Denise, during my time at University, I was helping her write an assignment on Southampton Football Club. Sat near the front, I was awestruck by Nicky Banger's good looks and able to get an eye full when he headed in my direction. All well and good until I cheered at the wrong moment, when the other team scored...The rest is history as they say.

Despite my dislike of football, I was glad to be back at The Newcome on a football day. The regulars at the packed pub were generally in good spirits, drunk and overly affectionate, wanting photographs and enjoying the attention from the staff. I have grown fond of many of the lads who turn up on a Saturday afternoon and really do feel like I am part of the furniture now. They seem happy to see me and we are able to have a laugh and joke about my lack of football knowledge. It was great to be behind the bar again on such a busy day and yes, I look forward to the next time Portsmouth play at home!
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