OXFAM - Remembering Events Three Years Ago!

Today has been another difficult day for Oxfam, as they try and limit the damage, done in their name. I have spoken much about the events of the last few days, but very little about how Darrell and I are feeling ourselves; today I want to change that. As you might expect, a lot of bad memories have surfaced, as we both once again deal with the fallout from Oxfam; it really does feel, like I have been transported back three years, the day after I was attacked and bullied by a member of the Oxfam team.

Darrell and I have been talking about current events, every minute of every day. From the moment we get up in the morning, until last thing at night, Oxfam is firmly on our mind. Sky news is constantly on the television and I am spending my time answering emails and correspondence, from ex Oxfam employees, friends and well wishers, offering support at this time. Whilst all of this concern is appreciated, it isn't always helpful, especially when you are trying to forget the difficulties of the past. It does seem that this scandal isn't going to go away quickly; we will be living with this for sometime, something I am preparing for.

Before falling asleep, whilst laying in bed, we have been reliving our own experiences, trying to once again work out, just what did happen in 2015. We were told this would be a period in our life, we would always remember and not for the right reasons. Our recollections, as difficult as they are, do at least keep a connection with the past, that we will have to eventually deal with. Closure will come at some point, of that we have no doubt, we just do not know when. The scandal will open up many more deep wounds, not only for us, but also for others who were at the wrong end of Oxfam's bullying. These are injuries that have never healed in any case and need to be redressed once again.

As Darrell and I enter our third year living in Spain, we have become far more grateful for the life we have, away from the trauma we experienced at Oxfam. Until recently I was thinking about them less and less, maybe once a month or so. This also reflected in my writing. I haven't blogged about Oxfam this much, for countless months. I had adapted to my new life in Spain and was slowly forgetting the stress of the past. I suppose I took my eye off the ball for a bit and started to relax, letting my guard down; the drama always tends to resurface at moments like this. Again I will have to pick up the pieces, from where I last left off.

A lot has happened, since the debacle at Oxfam. I arrived in Spain emotionally and physically exhausted; it took a long time to feel comfortable in my new surroundings. However Spain did what the UK and medication couldn't, make me feel alive again; able to walk down a street unaided, live the life I've always wanted and begin the process of forgetting. Today, every bad, adverse and inconsolable detail has come tumbling back into my World. Both Darrell and I have to start the process of remembering once more; even those issues we never wanted to recall again. It is important for us to end this cycle of strife, drawing a line under this episode, in order to move forwards in a positive way.

It has been a lovely day here in Gran Alacant, so we have both been out enjoying the sun, getting some fresh air and avoiding the news. During the three days I have had off work, I have just been stuck in front of the TV, digesting the unfolding events, as astonished and dismayed as everyone else. I never expected the circumstances of Oxfam's unraveling to be this obnoxious, despite what I went through; only time will tell, just how this charade plays out. Until then, we shall be keeping up with our daily walking, keeping occupied and staying well away from the fray!

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