Blogging Power!

I have been blogging since 2015 after suffering from a traumatic experience at work, resulting in illness and depression. My blog entries since, have documented my journey through the United Kingdom, mine and Darrell's new life in Spain, travels throughout ASIA and my new life back home in Portsmouth. It has been a deeply personal experience, and it has allowed me to express myself in a way that I haven't been able to before. Like most people I have all forms of social media, but that only allows for one off banal comments, that mean very little on the scale of things. Blogging created a story, filled with detail - a narrative of my life during challenging times.

As a blogger, I have come into contact with many people. The great and good of the blogging World, readers from all corners of the planet and most importantly for me at least, old friends and people I have come into contact with during the course of my life. As a writer, I often explore my past, trying to recall events that brought me to where I am today. I like to reminisce about 'the good old days' and remember times, good and bad, that have been responsible for the memories I carry around; a reminder of who I was and who I am now. I am lucky to be able to write about circumstances that would otherwise be forgotten.

From time to time I hear from readers of 'Roaming Brit' and also others who have stumbled across my site through facebook or a Google search. Each of them send a message for different reasons. For some, an entry has resonated with their own lives and others are looking for advice, about moving to Spain, or how to deal with bullies, as I did in 2015. Whatever their motivation, they are all part of the community I have tried to create, and they are the reason I continue to write. My personal blogging venture started off as a way of recalling events, that I just couldn't understand at the time. The entries helped me  comprehend their significance, and unravel the confusion that surrounded my life. Looking back, it became an important tool in a fight for justice, that still exists today.

This week I heard from someone called David, who had stumbled across my blog in passing. His time during lockdown, like many of us, has allowed him to look back at his life and recall his formative years, studying in Southampton, where I lived between 1992 and 2015. David attended a different University to me, and after he sent a photograph of himself during the mid 1990s, I did remember a face I hadn't seen for a while. We didn't know each other well, but our paths had crossed at some point in the past, and he remembered certain people and occasions that had a nuance of preponderance to him. A blog should bring people together, through shared experiences and important milestones. Fortuities, twenty-five years ago, can open doors that have been closed until now. David recalled situations I had long since forgotten, triggering a multitude of emotions, about a time, growing up gay two decades ago.

A friend once asked me, how I had so much to say, and I mentioned quite simply, 'because I never said it at the time.' You know the episodes, where you are sat in a room full of people and really want to say something, but are afraid to stand up and be counted, for fear of ridicule? Well those are the occasions I document today. Twenty odd years ago I wasn't the person I am now. I was particularly shy, rarely said diddly-squat and tended to keep myself to myself. There is so much I wish I had done and aforementioned back then, that just can't be intimated today. However, blogging gives me the opportunity to redress the balance and take back control of poignant moments that left me speechless at the time.

This pandemic has given many people like David some extra valuable time to sit and think about the past, in a way they wouldn't otherwise have done. I have rekindled many friendships and connections during this traumatic year and for that reason, it has been a positive experience for me. When times are tough we do tend to look back towards note worthier periods, the best days of our life, when we were young, devoid of responsibility and starting our transmigration into adult life. I yearn for those carefree days, despite the difficulties I encountered. Discovering our true selves, our sense of identity and our right of self-determination are important building blocks in our enduring story. Analysing the signposts, markers of divergence and defining moments in our personal history, is an important process, as I look back and discover just want went wrong and appreciate much that what went right.

Over the last six years, I have ascertained more about myself, than I have done in my entire life. Through blogging, self deconstruction and critical expression, I am more in tune with my psyche than ever before. Roaming Brit has become a catalyst for assertiveness and creativity, not only for me, but also for others around me. There are days I just don’t want to say anything and would rather curl up in a ball, but I know, when I reach the end of my latest entry, I will be satisfied that I have offloaded my innermost feelings and emotions for another week. The power to unite scattered events, with no apparent connection and relate their relevance to my own circumstances, remains the cornerstone and linchpin of Roaming Brit. The influences that surround me today are the memories of tomorrow, learning and understanding their importance today will help determine my direction tomorrow.

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