A Life Lived Differently!

I've actually had time off this Thursday, a rare thing these days; once again however I was up bright an early for a appointment with my GP at the Lake Road Practice. There was no waiting around unlike my experiences arranging appointments with a Doctor in Southampton and I was seen within five minutes of arriving. After an examination for an ongoing problem, I have been referred to St Mary's Hospital in Portsmouth for further tests. Since leaving Spain I have been on a mission to sort out health issues that took a back seat whilst living abroad. Although the local clinics are fantastic in Gran Alacant, I found the language barrier an issue, when speaking with practitioners; as a result I avoided attending appointments and ailments I should have dealt with were just left, resulting in further difficulties. Now I am home, I can at least start to look after my health again, important at my time of life.

Last night my old college friend Garry popped into the Newcome whilst I was working and we arranged to meet for coffee today. At just gone twelve, Garry took me for a tour of the local area in his camper van. Despite being back in the UK for three months now, I still haven't travelled too far from the Fratton area and know very little about the outskirts of the City where I now live. It was timely that Garry should suggest exploring outside of my comfort zone; it's something I have been meaning to do for a while, but with very little time and not having access to a car it has been difficult.

Garry used my blog to contact me a while back and still reads it as often as he can. Not only has blogging opened many doors for me, but it has also rekindled some old friendships. I am in contact with many people from the dim and distant past, only because of 'Roaming Brit' and that makes all the work I put in worth it; Eight hours a day writing is no mean task; blogging is a passion!

Today Garry wanted to introduce me to his life, driving me around his local neighbourhood and showing me the success he has become, since we last saw one another. Today he is somewhat of a property tycoon; after years of astute financial management, Garry can now reap the awards of his labours and I am pleased he can now take a step back and prepare for a more relaxing middle age. I am delighted to see family and friends doing well in their life; it is heartwarming to acknowledge just how far those I knew have come on their journey. As I sat reminiscing about days gone by I became aware that whilst my life has stood still in a financial sense, others have worked hard to attain success in their chosen field.

Garry was concerned that I felt rather downbeat about my own development and tried to put our differences into perspective. My voyage has gone backwards in a monetary sense, having lost more or less everything I used to own; the tangible assets, property and security have all but disappeared and I am left in a very precarious position, in stark contrast to a few years ago. Garry reminded me, that I shouldn't be measuring my accomplishments in a pecuniary sense; our conduct isn't just about how much money we have. He is right of course, both of us travelled in very different directions and without going into too much detail, I have enjoyed life, lived to the full in different countries and experienced far more than most; on that basis I agree with Garry. On the other hand, at my age, I should be thinking about winding down and taking it easy after years of working, yet I am barely making ends meet, living away from my husband, having to deal with some truly insurmountable complications. My journey has been a roller coaster ride of emotion and struggle, something that is certain to continue for many years.

I don't mind admitting how envious I am of other peoples success but I am mindful of my own failings that caused my current state of being. While my friends were forging careers, I was still far too busy enjoying life's excesses and paid little attention to the future; I took my eye off the ball and only have myself to blame. As someone far wiser than me once said, 'when you reach the bottom, your lowest point, there is only one way to go and that's up;' I agree wholeheartedly with this statement.

It is a privilege being home right now, I am able to once again enjoy relationships with people, I thought were long gone, so the reality is, my life has become all the richer for that. In away my biggest ability is connecting with people. My open, welcoming nature has always allowed me to form close and lasting affiliations that have stood the test of time. While others have lost contact with loved ones, I have managed to keep hold of links to the past, something I have always regarded as important. As an individual I am proud of my associations and do all I can to keep them alive. I have a diverse and varied network base, because I have gone out of my way to keep the attachments that matter most.

It is good to be in contact with Garry and others who played an important part in my youth once again, without them my continuance would have been far poorer. I am very philosophical about my place in the World now and am grateful I have a group of contacts who I can rely on for support, a friendly chat or a word or two of advice. Friendships are born from concurring circumstances at important milestones in our life, without their influences we would not have the awareness and understanding we have today. Memories are important, because they are a link to the past that sculpted and shaped our destiny. I am who I am, because of people like Garry and for that reason we should celebrate the closeness accorded to us through rewarding and enriching bonds. My past has once again become my future, for that I am truly grateful!

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